Day 109 Stomach Investigation

Day 109 Stomach Investigation

 

Inside the Stomach is the brewing of emotions and feelings. I’m making the connection that I’ve been obsessed and possessed by brewing emotions and feelings within my stomach and that the fact that I have been self conscious about the appearance of my stomach exposes the fact that I have been self conscious about brewing emotions and feelings within my stomach as I see that the outer experience of my stomach reflects the inner relationship with and as my stomach.

I recognize that I have waited to apply myself at times as like procrastination within myself with regards to facing accepted and allowed emotions and feelings.

I realise procrastination as waiting to apply/express self as unfortunate self suppression.

I realise the fortune in facing self suppression as the realisation of alleviation of and as self suppression.

I realise the accepted and allowed missed opportunities as consequences of manifested procrastination.

I realise the practicality of moment to moment self application as all as one as equal as self responsibility as self trust as radical and brutal self honesty.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having justified procrastination of daily tasks/chores as a result of and as emotional possession as manifested deviations/derivatives of fear.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for suppressing the daily practical self application as all as one as equal as self responsibility as self trust as radical and brutal self honesty.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for avoiding self direction as moment to moment self application as all as one as equal.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to postpone self responsibilities.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for suppressing myself as result of consequence of postponing self responsibilities.

I forgive myself for not realising that postponing activities/events/tasks/chores as reaction to thoughts/emotions/feelings is absurd ridiculousness and hilarious because it exposes accepted and allowed possession...and like allowing yourself to be possessed exposes point of passiveness...as like possessiveness is passiveness and like wow that’s fucked.

When and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself to avoid directing myself as walking through and into completion tasks/chores/events/activities as practical living self responsibilities...I stop and I breathe and I allow  myself to move as self responsibility as all as one as equal as what is best for everyone.

Day 108 Stomach

Day 108 Stomach

 

Ok, so i’ve been self conscious about my stomach and the fatness of my stomach/belly/gut. Ive written about this point before...and it’s like I didn’t get all the roots connected to this point out.  Why? Childhood relations and highschool relations.  What do I am remember in relation to self consciousness about my stomach? Tv commercials for abdominal products...watching Baywatch and dudes had ripped lean stomach’s...babes like dudes with ripped lean stomachs...getting teased/chirped about my stomach...reacting to getting chirped/teased about my stomach...looking in the mirror at my stomach...wishing it would just shrink and i’d have exposed ripped lean abbs...when i’d have my shirt off i’d be somewhat focused on looking at my stomach...self conscious of my stomach in change room...would compare my stomach to other people’s stomach.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being self conscious about my stomach/gut/belly.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not allowing myself to let go of emphasis on shape of my stomach and giving more attention to the stomach then the rest of my body parts...and therefore I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for separating myself from and as my stomach.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having looked and viewed my stomach as separate from myself from and as the perspective of hope and belief that my stomach has got a mind of its own.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for desiring a ripped lean stomach so that babes will flock to touch my stomach.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for comparing my stomach against other people’s stomach.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having gotten frustrated and emotionally hurt as sad and depressed as a result of people chirping/making fun of my stomach.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for getting emotional about body types and sizes and placing emphasis on the stomach as being one of the most important body parts.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have a polarity relationship of friction with and as my stomach.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising how ridiculous ive been as being self conscious about my stomach.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing people to know that Ive been self conscious about my stomach and it’s been a point i’ve mindfucked within  myself for years and years.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having such resistance for going deep within this point to make sure I get all the roots.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having been embarrassed about my stomach.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for worrying about people’s approval of my stomach.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being disappointed with myself for having not approved my stomach and therefore accepted and allowed an abusive relationship with and as my stomach.

I forgive myself for not unconditionally accepting and allowing my stomach to exist as me equal and one.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing feelings of positivity about my stomach and I forgive myself for accepting and allowing emotions of negativity about my stomach.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having reacted to my stomach as positive feelings or negative emotions based on my accepted and allowed self judgement of and as my stomach based upon the picture presentation I see of my stomach.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having suppressed my appetite as a way to make my stomach look smaller.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for obsessing about my stomach within the mirror.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being self conscious about my stomach while in the change room

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being self conscious about my stomach when my shirt is off.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being and having been possessed by my stomach as feelings/emotions and the appearance of and as my stomach.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for disregarding myself as my stomach.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having thought about not writing this point out fully.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for thinking I will just write a little bit about my stomach and then there that’s it,..all done.

I realise the ridiculousness of mindfucking myself about my stomach

I realise the funny in mindfucking myself about my stomach.

I realise the hilariousness of mindfucking myself about my stomach.

I realise the wow absurdity of mindfucking myself about my stomach.

I realise my stomach is me.

I realise I had accepted and allowed a polarity relationship to exist with and as my stomach

I realise the ridiculousness of being self conscious about my stomach as accepted and allowed mind fucking.

I realise i conditioned and programmed my relationships as definitions/perceptions/ideas about my stomach 

from television/peers/porn

When and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself to obsess about and look at my stomach with judgement as either being positive or negative...when and as I take my shirt off...I stop and I breathe and I allow myself a laugh/giggle/smile at this running joke of absolute ridiculousness i have accepted and allowed to exist within as a total mindfuck

I will expand on this point in my next blog.

Cheeers.

Day 107 Morning's

Day 107 Morning's

 

So I’ve noticed that recently I’ve been creating future projections early in the morning as consequence/reaction to emotions that come up within myself after getting up and feeling kind of tired...like I have committed to fully be awake and moving myself about my day...it’s like I’m up and I’m moving..But...I’m moving with some resistance with the thought in mind that I wouldn’t be getting up right now if I wasn’t going to work right now...like if I didn’t have an obligation, I would still be sleeping. So as a result...ive said to myself in response to the emotions of tiredness and accepted and allowed resistance to waking up,.. that I should go to bed earlier. And then at the end of the day...I think about what I was projecting in the morning...but always want to stay up as late as I possibly can and max out my evening as much as possible...to the point where I look at the time and it’s like ok I should try and get at least 4hrs of sleep. Sometimes I get less than 4 hours and other times I get more.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to react to emotions in the morning of being displeased with the fact that I am awake and that due to accepted and allowed obligation I am unable to go back to sleep.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having been emotional about waking up in the morning 

and not being able to sleep more.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having been addicted to sleep and not wanting to get up and move myself about when I naturally wake up from my sleep.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to create resistance to being awake when I am required to get up for work.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have a shitty attitude about beginning my day when I am required to begin my day.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having suppressed the principle that gratitude is a great attitude with specific regards to and as appreciation and gratefulness for being awake and present when I get up and begin my day.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having suppressed the awesomeness of the beginning/starting of a new day.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having not stood as gratitude as a great attitude as the beginning of my day and being awake.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for coping with being unsatisfied when waking up in the morning to go to work.

I forgive myself for not realising the simple step I can take in the morning when waking up to accelerate my movement as appreciation and gratitude as great attitude and let go of emotional disarray...by enjoying my morning process’s...like playing some music in the morning while I prepare myself for work...like allow myself to flow with and as the music while I move about...like effortless waltzing as I allow myself to freestyle my movements as effortless flow.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having suppressed self enjoyment within and as the morning.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for wanting more time to wake up in the morning...and I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having resisted waking up in the morning...and I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having dwelled within and as emotional disarray within and as the morning as like being stubborn about moving myself as a result of accepting and allowing myself for not pushing point of resistance to moving myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to  mind fuck myself in the morning as a result of accepting and allowing resistance to self directed e movement as self enjoyment/self fulfillment as like the pinnacle of fun.

I realise I am responsible for having a great morning.

I realise I am capable of having a great morning every day as the decision is mine.

I realise I wasn’t capitalizing on my opportunities to play as self enjoyment/self movement within and as every morning.

I realise I am responsible for my enjoyment of myself within and as the morning.

I realise the simple step I can take in the morning when waking up to accelerate my movement as appreciation and gratitude as a great attitude and let go of emotional disarray...by enjoying my morning process’s...like playing some music in the morning while I prepare myself for work...like allow myself to flow with and as the music while I move about...like an effortless waltz as I allow myself to freestyle my movements as effortless flow.

I realise the ridiculousness of accepting and allowing a shitty attitude about getting up in the morning.

I realise the absurd stupidity of accepting and allowing the justification of shitty attitude about getting up in the morning and being awake in the morning.

I realise I had allowed a ridiculously absurdly stupid attitude about getting up in the morning and starting a new day.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for bringing the previous day to today from and as a starting point of regret...like thinking about the previous day and creating judgements about not liking things I did and then reacting to my thinking with emotion and allowing myself to fuck myself with self induced energy buzz as a result of accepting and allowing to give attention and brew polarity friction within myself as emotional/feeling judgements of pure bullshit that just kind of resulted as mind automation.

I realise I am capable of beginning each day fresh and with a total release of the previous day.  I realise when I go to sleep at night that I let go of everything from that day as total self forgiveness so that I am clear in the morning and therefore no regret as no accepted and allowed self judgements about the day before because I totally release the past from and as any and all judgements as the past is gone and I give my attention and focus to the present as the present I am receiving and playing with and as.

When and as I see myself accepting and allowing emotional disarray within and as the morning as like resistance to being awake and being agitated, angered annoyed that I am awake...I stop...I breathe...I realise the fuckedness of what I was allowing and I allow myself to play as I move as an effortless  flow of and as self direction as I waltz my way through my morning as gratitude being a great attitude in which I am grateful for.

Day 106 Chores

Day 106 Chores

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting and avoiding chores.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing an energetic buzz of negativity towards chores and completing chores when they become available to be completed as a result of accepting and allowing excuses/justification like , ‘I’ll do it later, not right,..i’m tired...i just want to relax.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that doing chores is stressful.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having surpressed self enjoyement as self directed movement while completing chores.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having created a stressful relationship with chores.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having hated doing chores.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having been mad at my parents when they would ask me to do chores.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having viewed chores as like being a punishment...like a prison sentence...like as a result of this crime/bad behaviour...I am required to do so many chores.

I forgive myself for having accepted and allowed myself to have a bad attitude about doing chores as a means of self support and stability.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having avoided the daily support of doing daily chores as a means of staying organized and efficient with my time.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to procrastinate with chores.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to neglect chores as self responsibilities

I realise I developed and designed a poor relationship with and as chores when I was a young child when my parents introduced chores to me.

I realise completing chores as means of self support as a result of self directed physical movement as the result of and as self will.

I realise daily chores as a point of assistance and support to encourage stability as equality and oneness in and as everyday practical physical living here.

I realise relationship with chores reflects organization and efficiency and that completing chores when they become available to do so assists and supports the development and enhancement of organization and efficiency as life process.

When and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself to resist doing chores that are required to be completed...I stop and I breathe and I push through accepted and allowed manifested resistance and I do the chore in the moment.

When and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself to get emotional about completing chores...I stop and I breathe and I laugh at the ridiculousness of getting emotional about chores.

When and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from and as the chore that is required to be completed...I stop and I breathe and I face myself as the chore/task at hand that is required to be completed as a means of self nourishment.

I commit myself to enjoying self directed physical movement as I complete chores.

I commit myself to stay on top of my chores and not allow myself to get way behind on my chores as a result of accepted and allowed self abdication.

I commit myself to enjoying the experience of myself while completing chores.

I commit myself to enhancing my organizational and efficiency skills as I continue to do my chores as self willed physical movement.

I commit myself to sharing the self realisation within and as self support as completing daily chores as a point of assistance and support as equality and oneness.

Day 105 Setting Goals

Day 105 Setting Goals

 

Goal is completed specifics as like scoring achievement success. Scoring achievement success is determined by WILL.  WILL is self commitment as self direction as equality and oneness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have suppressed WILL as self commitment as self direction as equality and oneness as setting goals and scoring achievement success.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for reacting to scoring achievement success as completed specifics as goals by accepting and allowing myself to create judgement within myself as doubting myself as accepted and allowed separation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself as separation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the justification of separation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create separation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising how easy and how much fun it is to flow as WILL.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having quit/dropped goals as a result of feelings of resistance as accepted and allowed train of thought

I realise setting goals is first move in scoring and achieving success as Self Willed Movement.

I realise goals as self directed physical movements.

I realise the abundant amount of opportunity as ways to play as self directed physical movements.

I realise I am grateful for having given myself the time to write to myself as assistance and support as self reflection of and as living words.

I realise awesomeness as self directed physical movements.

When and as I see myself considering giving up and let go of set goals...I stop and breathe and allow and accept myself as pushing through resistance as self willed movement.

When and as I see myself accepting and allowing creating the justification of dropping goals/plans as consequence of following train of thought, I stop and I breath and I face myself with brutal self honesty.

When and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself to avoid setting goals....I stop and I breathe and I realise the ridiculousness of avoiding scoring goals as like avoiding self responsibilities.

I commit myself to scoring goals I set for myself to score