tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25950169030210854082024-03-19T03:14:44.420-07:00Mike McDonald's Journey to LifeI am engaging myself in a 7 year journey to Nothingness. Meaning I am writing myself here...all the way through my mind, birthing my Life Potential within and as my physical body and Being Here. I re-structure myself within and as words. I am sharing my process of self-forgiveness, self-corrective statements and self-realizations as I walk my journey to life. Cheers and Enjoy.Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.comBlogger861125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-89407843668705607302022-04-01T12:00:00.001-07:002022-04-01T12:00:58.924-07:00Picking Up the Pieces. Day 815.Blog Day 814 was about Popularity..<div><br></div><div>I was reflecting last night...how I've caused myself the experience of much grief within acting foolish and making miss-takes.</div><div><br></div><div>I've been fighting against the point of Popularity, while at the same time seeking it. It's been a Suppression Reflection Status of UGLY.</div><div><br></div><div>I've had a hard time with Peer Pressure since i was a small child. Desiring and Seeking Attention in the form of Praise + (k)not wanting any criticism/negative feedback + really really feeling vitimized when and as I am criticized. And its bothered me so much.</div><div><br></div><div>My rebellious thinking has been to stop seeking praise and attention + to actually seek criticism/negative feedback..so that i can practice Humbleness and Humility in self-reflection.</div><div><br></div><div>The HUM in Humble has been supportive for me in recent days, as a point of Slowing Down and Breath Support as Patience to Pause for a Moment and Stop + See Here.</div><div><br></div><div>I forgive myself for not realizing and understanding how self-compromising it is to Seek attention and praise.....that actually...that experience is coming from a starting point of being 'less than worthy'...like k(not) realizing Self/Source/StartingPoint/Creation from Within to Without. The bond being our Oneness and Equality as the simplicity in existing here.</div><div><br></div><div>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to self-compromise and degrade myself worth in desiring to accommodate others and win their approval ratings.</div><div><br></div><div>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing how the Grudge is always the Judge...and that self-honesty in experiencing my Vulnerability is actually the means to dispute resolution.</div><div><br></div><div>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist as a secret judge that holds grudges. </div><div><br></div><div>I realize, understand and know the ridiculousness of holding onto stress/strain/pain...</div><div><br></div><div>I commit myself to processing my stress/strain/pain as it presents itself here...I realize in embracing what is here...what comes up...is the practical way to easily work through discomforts, uncertainty, fears and doubt.</div><div><br></div><div><br></div>Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-32642325748921277972021-03-05T20:29:00.002-08:002021-03-05T20:29:40.486-08:00How to grow microgreens right in the ground - Field Micros<iframe frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://youtube.com/embed/5qAuS4p80Mo" width="480"></iframe>Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-60808362985681599062021-01-02T10:21:00.000-08:002021-01-02T10:21:02.819-08:00Day 764 - Small Bits of Movement, Is this the Key?Every Creation begins with the first Action.... Process of 1 million steps begins by taking the 1st step. A process of 1 million stretches begins with making the first stretch. To create a lot of movement is a series of small bits of movement. Bit by bit.<br />
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I bring attention to the awareness of little bits of movement, because I have noticed at different times where i have justified not participating within things...because it seems like too much.....and there is a resistance to moving into it. I have noticed i have created limitation for myself and actually prevented myself from doing things that I would ultimately like to create/build...because i have allowed myself to get discouraged by the end goal I see in my mind...and seeing myself as so far away from that point...and then mindfucking about the time it will take to get there...<div><br /></div><div>To be Continued:</div><div><br /></div><div>****Continuing****</div><div><br /></div><div>02/01/2016 - - - - - - - - - - ------ ------ - --- - - ---------------- ------------- - ---------- - ----- > > > 01/01/2016</div><div>
<br /></div><div><br /></div><div> I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how easy it is to change my mind when and as I am holding onto something in my mind that I see - I realize it's fine to see things - and that seeing everything here as it is without a filter is suppose to be normal for everyone - I realize it's quite silly of me for being ashamed of myself for being able to see so much.</div><div><br /></div><div>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold onto the experience of 'discouraged'.</div><div><br /></div><div>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding 'how' I left some of my Journey to Life Blogs, "undone" so to speak. I realize, understand and know - the fact that I created a solid base for myself here - made it really possible for me to simply traverse into a sweet line here.</div><div><br /></div><div>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold onto a discouraged experience as a result/consequence of being lame.</div><div><br /></div><div>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding every single way in which I could be lame - I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not totally realizing what it means to be lame.</div><div><br />I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for making a big deal about making some simple self-corrections - I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to Expect a Much Higher Level of Standard of Excellence in terms of what it means to Live Words as a Consistent and Constant Voice of Support as Life Itself Here.</div><div><br /></div><div>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding that I've used others for my own benefit - where really I always felt like I had to be even better than I am because I couldn't see hardly anyone ever really being committed to doing anything all that much.</div><div><br /></div><div>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I was SHORTING Myself as like this TRADE AGAINST MYSELF....Like my Life BANK HERE is a LONG as FUCK TRADE - and self-compromise became the potential profit from and as an 'opportunity splurge' for a 'quick gain' a real 'win'. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for suppressing the LOSS within and as a Win/Loss Equation and the consequences of supporting a Traitor War Mentality.</div><div><br /></div><div>I commit myself to correcting the Traitor War Mentality.</div><div><br /></div><div>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to encourage people fighting me as my way of developing a tremendous ability and capacity for profound response ability.</div><div><br /></div><div>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to get caught up at times within and as expectations - specifically when and as I would 'Expect Better' of a Mate. </div><div><br /></div><div>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to take it personally when and as a Mate 'Just doesn't seem to understand me'.</div><div><br /></div><div>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to experience heartache/sorrow/sadness/anger/irritation/frustration/disappointment/agony/disbelief/depression when and as I realize I am being judged by a Mate and they're not seeing their blind spot and they're mirroring it back to me - telling me I am fucked.</div><div><br /></div><div>I commit myself to stopping to pity people.</div><div>I commit myself to simply have the balls to tell people what's what - when and as I see What's What/</div><div>I commit myself for accepting and allowing myself for "taking it easier on others than I would on myself" - I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give less than my best support to my mates because I think sometimes that my mates are to weak and soft for me to speak so directly.</div><div><br /></div><div>I commit myself to speaking direct.</div><div><br /></div><div>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame my mates for my ability/inability to speak so directly the best support and assistance as life itself here.</div><div><br /></div><div>I commit myself to giving the best life support as the living words here.</div><div><br /></div><div>I commit myself to share my process journey of SPEAKING UP - and SPEAKING OUT - </div><div>I commit myself to share the Dangers of STAYING QUIET When One NEEDS TO SPEAK UP.</div><div><br /></div><div>I Commit myself to myself first and foremost here - I commit myself to considering others only when and as I have effectively cared for myself first - I realize I co-exist here and that for me to be effective in co-existing here - it's important to me that I regard myself as my very own personal responsibility.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-6742070732406686492019-03-05T20:53:00.004-08:002019-03-05T20:55:04.058-08:00DAY 814 - PopularityI forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having resistance towards Popularity.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating a resistance towards Popularity.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that life is easier to simple not be Popular and rather just be quiet and not draw attention to myself.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having a preference towards keeping quiet and being more internal and less external.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create a polarized relationship within myself where i prefer to be very internal and less external in terms of sharing myself.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating a belief that it is safer from a perspective of survival to simply be less vocal of myself in existence.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the interconnectedness within and as my internal and external realities and that my self-expression as who I really am here is beyond the the justification and excuses of survival system constructs.<br />
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I realize, understand and know the ridiculousness of allowing myself to be swayed by survival systems of control and suppression.<br />
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I commit myself to sharing myself and the processes walk as what it means to give as I like to receive.<br />
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I commit myself to let go of any resistance towards popularity.<br />
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I commit myself to stop self-censoring myself from a perspective of not wanting to draw attention to myself and the process of self-change I am in fact walking and have been walking for a very long time.<br />
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I commit myself to practice the living of giving as i like to receive as a way for me to birth my internal processes outward into the world as what it means to speak up, stand up and share myself as what it means to give as i like to realize - i realize, understand and know this is an extension and follow through of the giving i am first for gving to and as myself here and so from here to each one as a 'you is me' in another life here.<br />
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I commit myself to the awareness of the point, 'I got this 1 life - this one opportunity to exercise the best development and maturity of my utmost potential.<br />
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I commit myself to investigate all things and keep that which is good.Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-72504771129936419632019-03-04T07:51:00.001-08:002019-03-04T07:51:35.848-08:00DAY 813 - EXPLAIN NATION EXPLANATION
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I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself for becoming conflicted within and as the point of
explanation – where it's like i am frustrated when and as another
in my remaility demands an explanation of me. Within this – I
forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to BLAME another for
acting as a trigger point for a deeper point within and as myself
that i am not seeing clearly – and I forgive myself for accepting
and allowing myself to go into SPITE as like the fuck you – you're
fucked out flow of blame and spite together as taking a stance of
fighting/war where it's a disagreement in and as word and world
regards here – not realizing – the very basic point of it always
comes back to myself here – and that where there is even the
smallest of movements in me – and i perceive it to be as a result
of another's actions/reactions – there's a point a major point of
self-accountability that requires immediate direction and
self-correction.</div>
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I realize that when I experience a
trigger – my reality will continue to pulsate the point untill I
infact substantiate the best self-correction within myself. I
realize this is quite cool in fact and really showcases the equality
and oneness of process in fact here for each and every one because we
are alll here to assist and support one another – wheter we realize
it or not is somewhat irrelevant, because the process of fine tuning
structural alignment as life itself here – is a 24/7 thing and so –
Life is always Unconditional Here – and it's a very grounding
experience in recognizing ourselves all together here – always all
ways as what is our best in the moment response ability.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself for not realizing and understanding that when I am
demeanding an explanation from another in my reality it generally
reflects a point of misalignment within myself and that my
effectiveness in receiving the support and assist from another as 'me
in another life' results in and as my standing awareness one and
equal – where i am not so demanding and or persuassive per se – I
am simply here and in that the words flow easily – i realize and
understand that when i speak with any sort of charge onto another in
my reality – it creates and permeates a sort of dissonance and war
like construction and constriction of best complimentary
relationships – i realize that there's a tremendous responsibility
to myself and so to all life here – within and as the very standing
awareness of 'oneness and equality' here.</div>
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I realize and understand that there's a
process of self-realization that takes place where each one here must
stand alone in and as their self-realization of what it in facts
means to exist all together here Alone One and Equal. I realize
within and as this process – each one here is in the process of
facing face so to speak as all of our faces and that sometimes for a
moment, we require to let go of holding on to certain faces, spaces
and places in order to fine tune the walking of our world here
together as our words within and as the very life itself blueprint
design – oneness and equality.</div>
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I realize there are so many dimensions
to ourselves here as life itself in fact as the process structural
alignment here as life birthed from and as the physical. I realize a
way of simply placing perspective on the magnitude of the purity of
the physical here in and as the sound body creation here – is in
and as our word and so to our world regards as the sounds/words are
housed inside and so to outside ourselves as an outflowing expression
of our innerstanding and care taking of who we are in fact here. I
realize this is an extensive process of fine tuning and
re-organization in fact as like each one will always have work to do
so to speak as work is the visible expression of love in fact –
work is life as our ability to respond - and so much so the balance
and harmony to in fact living our best life as the love in and as the
work we do – is the art of play itself here – where as the words
oneness and equality are recognized and substantiated as a
bond/marriage fusion together – so to are the words - “work and
play”.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the various
conflicting definitions within and as words – where for example –
a word means one thing to one person and means another thing to
another person – within this – i see realize and understand there
is a sharing process in and as the expression of “explanation” –
where an explanation is in fact the solution as “living words in
fact here” it is the 'who i am statement of accurate account and
detail'. I realize, understand and know there's many ways in which
to share the standing awareness of myself as who I am as the 'living
words in fact here.' I realize the fun within and as the work and
play in showcasing my very best regards as my in the moment – from
moment to moment - statement of accurate detail and accounting –
As Who I am Here.
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I realize the word Explanation has much
creative usage – I Realize and understand there is both a positive
and a negative aspect possible within and as “explanation” itself
– I realize, understand and know this to be an individual and
collective process unfolding together at the same time – where
first the process is on self-awareness and unfolding our word and
world regards as what it in fact means to live the, “who I am –
as the Living Words – In Fact Here.” I realize this is an
extensive process of physical work and play and that My very work and
play will be challenged and criticized extensively as this is the
best way to support my continued development as what it means to In
Fact – Work and Play – Here Together.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself for not realizing how in some moments of my process
of structural ressonance alignment i've fucked with myself by
becomming possessed within and as a physical addiction to energy –
where I resort back into the early genesis of myself within and as an
inferior behavior pattern/system and thus there is a process of
self-correction required in order to actually in fact substantiate my
best growth, development, maturity, expansion and structural
creativity as Who I am Here as the Living Words. I realize so much
so this is once again a matter of word and world regards – and that
after a time – the process of exercising best response ability in
substantiating the creation of substantial change as the very
substance of myself that i substantiate – One bit at a time – as
it is as simple as one breath at a time – one word at a time - the
beauty of course coming in and as the very recognizing and regarding
myself as the world itself here – One and Equal.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself for being indecisive within me at times in terms of
how i will utilize my words – i forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself to doubt myself within and as my usage of words. I
realize, understand and know it's a mind fuck of sorts when i become
too fixated on the 'how' of myself here – it's a point of fun and
funny in fact – because it's the very point of knowing the 'flip'
as the 'who i am here as the flip in fact – what it means to rotate
myself in and as my very outlook and perspective and realize the
interconnectiedness...the very in fact multi-dimensional nature of
myself as the 'who I am In Fact Here as the Living Words – as it's
so much so in ReMembering myself here as all the bits/words/parts of
me here that enable the How of Myself here in and as the outflowing
expressions and this is so much so a process of Self-Trust as the How
comes through as the outflowing expression of and as the Inner
Standing of the Who I am in and as Thought, Word and Deed.</div>
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To express the above in a similar way
is to recognize that How I am in thought, word and deed is a
reflection of WHO I am within and as my thoughts, words and deeds –
and it's a fun and funny thing because each is here in Compliment as
One and Equal Here to dish out the best Assists and Goals as what it
really means to live life as our best reponsibility here – I am
talk about being the best sport – as all is always fully engaged!
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Whether I like the weather or not is so
much so a point of self-honesty in accounting for my likes and my
dislikes and so much so it is a process of learning to like that
which i dislike – which sounds like a strange and peculiar thing
because this requires the humbleness and the humility to stand One
and Equal Here as Life Itself here – and to really know all of
myself here – the good and the bad of everything Here. I mean –
“Investigate all things and keep what is good. This practically
means to really get to know and understand the 'bad' and to actually
walk the self-correction process for real in fact – the very who I
am as a Best Life Creator Here – One and Equal.”</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself to limit myself within and as my usage and standing
awareness of words.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the seemingly
infinite possibilities within and as the very limitations of myself
in and as the usage and standing awareness of my words – within
this – I realize, understand and know that it's about – Quality
of my Words – not so much about Quantity – in and as the
simplicity of and as Word and World Expressions here – I realize
the art of simplicity is one and equal with the art of
sophistication. I realize and understand that by saying less –
it's equal and one to saying more. I realize, understand and know
that this is like a basic parenting and patience process we each walk
with ourselves in returning to source so to speak as what it means to
learn and walk for real as one word at a time – as it is one step
at a time – as it is – one breath at a time.</div>
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I realize a day is a lifetime and then
sum/some because the day consists always all ways as the sum total of
my sharings/givings as the very what it in fact means to live, Pro
For Giving Here as a Life Broadcaster – Realizing, Understanding
and Knowing that the Life Broadcast, the Playwright In Fact is always
Accounting as It is the very who I am as what it means to live –
Self-Accountability – and So the very process of Me Here in Fact as
the Real ...and Royal 'We' Here is in Fact Always All Ways Expansive
as What is in fact Best for All. This is In Deed the Science as the
Signs of Awe So Me as the who I am as Awesome in Fact Here. My very
living and loving as the harmony infact as the best regards creative
collaboration here of and as the what it means to live the who and
how of Oneness and Equality.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself for having resisted to see words for the words and
rather shift and shape the words to my particular preferred way of
looking at words. I realize, understand and know words to be
mulitidimensional with a variety of usages, meanings, expressions,
contexts, implications, infererrences, assumptions, conclusions...and
really that 'words' in and of themselves are simply an
extenstion/reflection of physical life substance here – and in
fact are in many ways very/vary maleable and formable and
complimentary.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the extensive
nature of words as the inner manifestation of substance in fact here
as our outflowing expressions here as the very physical substance
building blocks here. I reaalize, understand and know the very purity
of essence of my physical substance here ...this physical reality
here – there's a real maleability and flexibility in and as the
very flow that works/plays in compliment with the firmness and
rigiidity of structure. I realize, understand and know this to be an
interesting and fascinating dynamic of life substance in fact here as
it's the marriage in standing awareness of 'oneness and equality'
together here as what it means to bond together in unision as
complimentary support – the very 1+1 equation in fact = basic math
and common sense.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the extensive
nature into and as the world as war where there is a fighting for
position and a sort of arguing that transpires as like this battle
for supremacy and how it is rooted within and as conflicting word and
world relationships within and as the very substance of the physical
in fact here.</div>
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I realize, understand and know the
tragic comedy of the commons here – as the suppression of common
sense in fact – where there's a propensity to in fact fearing to
stand alone – yet together as all as one as life in fact here –
it's a tragic comedy of sorts because it's in the very questioning
and conflicts that arise where an in fact Panic sets in as an
outflowing justification to worry as like the perpetuated Rush
experience that again is excused as like the addictiion and possesion
to physical energy is a self-consumption activity in fact and it's
ironicaly tragic because it's all too common to not/knot real eyes to
see how we are in fact always all ways fucking ourselves within and
as the positions we hold in relationship to others here when and as
there's a dissonance in structural resonances alignment as 'defense'
or 'offense' because in fact life is not 'sided' as one side or the
other side in fact – no that is the 'art' of war so to speak as
like the very game/sport of war itself here – where it's about
taking and moving from position to position to strategize both a
strong offense and and a strong defense – it's fascinatingly funny
in fact because it's an ongoing play and work – and it continues
untill One Stands Up and Recognizes the Absurd Ridiculousness in a
Way where it becomes an Obvious Assist in Seeing the Point and so to
sharing in the enjoyment of seeing here together clearly and having a
momentary laugh of the release of suppression as like the beast of
burden becoming undone...unwound in fact as like there's nothing left
to hold onto in fact when and as we effectively breathe and let go in
and as the very one moment of change in fact here – the very
constant and continous dance of life itself here – Change. The In
Fact – thought, word and deed – Weather of our Time – The
Experience is Indeed Timeless.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the physical
structural resonance alignment in fact as the very word and world
sound equation here as the basic math in and as the marriage/bond of
and as sound itself here as the purity and essence of physicality
here.</div>
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I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself for deceiving myself in making a believing of things
to be outside of myself, not fully realizing the gravity of my inner
reality as the space and place - water holder of and as my sound body
alignment here – the in fact process of my structural resonance
aligment. I realize, understand and know this is the matter – the
life responsibility to/for physical substance in fact here – my
physical body – the very answer to the question as the 'Why”...flip
side of My...The very in fact Expression of Best Word and World
Regards Here.</div>
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I commit myself to continue
working/playing the living/loving of substance itself in fact here as
the very answer and solution to “WHAT” it in Fact Means to Live
as a Self-Responsible Human Being.</div>
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I commit myself to showcase the “WHO”
I am as the Living Words Here – as Life In fact Birthed from and as
the Physical.</div>
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I commit myself to showcase the “How”
I am In fact Here as the detail and explanation into the Creative
Arts of Myself Here.</div>
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I commit myself to sharing my Art Work
and Playwrights as my Best Regards in Standing Awareness of what it
in fact means to live as The AuthorShip Here.</div>
Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-7469205968646532902019-03-03T08:48:00.001-08:002019-03-03T08:50:16.448-08:00DAY 812 - PLAY As the Fight for Change ItSelf HereI Forgive Myself for Accepting and Allowing Myself for not Realizing and Understanding that Play Itself May Be Experienced as a Sort of "Fight" In and As "The Moves" Through the Energetic 'Firewalls' of Self-Impossed Limitation/Suppression.<br />
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I Forgive Myself for Accepting and Allowing Myself for Not Realizing and Understanding that In Order to Crush My Resistance....My Suppression....My Very Suppression In Fact....I Require to In Fact Do Something - To Move - To Act - To Take a Stance - To Stand Up Within Myself - to Play/Fight in a Way as the Exercising Way of Self-Direction. This can also be Referred to as the "Inner-Ninja of Change Itself." I Realize, Understand and Know this is a Living Application - the Very Nature Being 'In-Tune Here' as 'Word Regards' and it's a Physical Movement - a Very Way to Break On Free from the Chains of Self-Imposed Non-Movement. #CrushingIT<br />
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I Forgive Myself for Accepting and Allowing Myself for Not Realizing and Understanding the Extensive Energetic Physical Addiction to the Experience of 'Boredom' as a Means to Keeping Me in a State of Lock Down where there's a sort of a General "Dol Drum" to my Everyday Living as like this burried point of "Self-Defeat" in a way - Burdened by the Knowledge I Have...Perpetuating the Very Suppressed Thinking that this is all there is - Not Realizing and or Understanding my "Explosive Nature" In and as the Moment of Movement as Life Burst from and as my Physicality Here.<br />
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I Forgive Myself for Accepting and Allowing Myself for Having Resisted to Be Honest with Myself About My in the Moment Experience of Myself. I Realize, Understand and Know the Consequence of Neglectng the Practicality of My in the Moment Word/World Regards and Specificity. I Realize the Absurd Ridiculousness of Chooosing to rather 'Hold Myself Together in a State of Physical Suppression' as my 'Default Normal Operating State' - Totally Fronting the Living Effectiveness of Myself Here - Not Realizing, Nor Understanding the Propensity to Accept and Allow Less of Myself Here. I Reaize, Understand and Know - How I am in Fact Able to Move as a Result of Understanding and Knowing "WHO" I am - In and as the Very Living Awareness of Myself Here- #worldclassplayer.<br />
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I Realize, Understand and Know - All Words are Alive Here - And it's a process of Word and World Regards Here - and that it's to Recognize, Understand and SPECIFICALLY Define the Very Moment to Moment Experience of Myself Here as this is #Critical to My Living Change from Moment to Moment as the very Constant and Consistency Here as Change Itself Made Manifest. #worldclassplayer<br />
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I Commit Myself to Explore What It Means to PLAY FIGHT My Way Through Any and All Firewalls I experience. I Realize there is Indeed a Humbleness and Humility in and as the Very Nature and Dichotomy of what it means to PLAY FIGHT.<br />
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A Practical Physical Example is TICKLING and How One Responds/Reacts - Another Example is Laughter - How One Shares in and as a Joke/Funny Moment - If there is Much Suppression and Firewalls - One will Simply Decline Participation as the very Suppressed Stance of Self in Fact Living a Resistance and Refusual to SHARE PLAY Itself Here. <br />
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A Practical Alone Physical Example of Play - is to Do something so Deliberately Out of Character - like for Instance to Yell Out Loud for No Apparent Reason - To Make Some Silly Sounds - To Get up from your desk and do 30 pushups right now - to Periodically throughout your day Decide to Flex Your Quads - to Perdiodically Throughout our day flex the Pecs - ...flex the feet pressure points - Play with physical pressure points - explore small movement pattens - there's so many movement patterns one can explore within and as the infinite moment of breath - the potential is indeed extraordinary - Suggest to Explore what is Possible within and as One Breath.<br />
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Also - Perhaps an Obvious - Yet Overlooked Example of Physical Play and Outpouring Self-Expression as the In the Moment Share of Who We Are - Freestyle-Self-Expression-Flow - as the very speaking in the moment beyond thinking- where it's a self-trust in and as our very self-movement here - the experience is extraordinary and the results are incredible as it's a way to exercise and account for our Balance in and as our Word/World Base Here - Because Our World and Living Effectiveness is In and as Word Play . So Dare to Communicate In the Moment without the Hesitation to Doubt Yourself and Lock Yourself Into a Self-Contained Box Of Shitty Nasty Suppression.<br />
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The Inner Ninja is a Real Experience I Highly Reccomend as it can also be described as Dope as Fuck and the Camaraderie of it is in Recognizing and Regarding that we have #worlclassplayer Here as All is Part of the Group and it's the expression as Word Play Itself here as #worldclassplayer. #onenessandequality<br />
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Pleasse Note that Creation in and of Itself is Very Fun and Funny and Creatively Collaborative and There's Room for Many Words of Regard to describe/depict the Very Dance of Life Itself Here.<br />
#Abundance. <br />
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To Be Continued with, "Dope As Fuck"<br />
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<br />Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-43509461696638271842019-03-03T05:19:00.002-08:002019-03-03T05:19:48.745-08:00DAY 811 - PEER INFLUENCEI forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to suppress myself out of a concern for my peers.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that I am doing the best for the greater good if i simply shut up and avoid speaking about that which is regarded as contentious and or not well understood.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe and or think that if more than one of my peers makes judgement or is inquistive on my character it is necessary for me to assume a position of defense where i must entertain an inquisition into the overall character of myself here.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to get caught up in the debate of right and wrong and what is and isn't permitted as acceptable behavior for myself as so defined by my peers review of and as my character in a very selective limited view of my overal reality here.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having taking the bait of debate in feeling like I owe an explanation of sorts as like to explain myself in a way to put at bay the judgements and assumptions onto and perceived as my character assasination.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to get caught up in the entertainment of my mates thinking - where it's like ok - i must take my mates by the hand and walk through the door of change itself here when i can see all is not clear.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for playing along with less than stellar thinking and assumption as like a sort of whatevers - it is what it is - untill it's stopped - who am i to judge another for the very practice in thinking. I realize thinking can be utilized as as tool to support effective navigations as the Life Waters Here - I realize this is a practice made perfect and it's a fine art of vocabulary recognition, remediation and elongation.<br />
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I commit myself to check myself when and as I see myself simply following allong with the thinking of others in my environment.<br />
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I commit myself to check myself when and as I resist speaking up because a position and stance has been created as a sort of resistance to my inner awareness and standing position.<br />
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I realize, understand and know - every single time - my reality presents me a test and challenge of my utmost potential and i waver in doubt as to the substantial nature of my best character response ability here - i fall in my shame as the undertainty in me to move as the trust from the core of me as who i am here as life itself - -blueprint design in fact. I realize i will have various moments of engagement where i am tested full on in a variety of wayss as to the effectiveness of my common sense standing here as the very epitome of equality and oneness made manifest.<br />
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I commit myself here as the very epitome of equality and oneness made manifest.<br />
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I commit myself to expose systematic flaws of inferior natures.<br />
I realize, understand and know that systems in and of themselves are not inherettently evil and that it is a matter of standing awareness of what is good and what is bad and making the labored effort to create and substantiate what systems are best in terms of providing opptimum support here - as i realize, understand and know the transition from consciousness to awareness is extensive and the best system supports will facilitate the process journey to life here.<br />
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I commit myself to continue sharing my process journey as life itself here - i realize this is an ongoing exposure and sharing into and as the nature of Play itself Here.<br />
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I commit myself to sharing Play in fact as what it means to live for real beyond the suppression state of being like a stoned system into a state of inferior acceptance and allowance - not realizing and understanding the 'keep it simple stupid' nature of change itself here - and the very How and Who I am as the very Player that Creates myself Here as the Experience of Myself Here in and as My Very Applications - I realize, understand and know the simplicity of the learning process as How I as a child like player Learns in Real Time as the very Interaction as Life Itself Here - I remember the very beginnin'gs of my process of Language Integration as the Very Elementary Humble Beginning's of Play Itself Here.<br />
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I commit myself to contnue to Play as my word and world regards Here.<br />
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I commit myself to showcase how One Word can Assist and Support Any-One to Unlock the very Suppressions and Suspicions in Word and World Regards Here.<br />
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<br />Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-57291440061907088172019-02-28T07:18:00.001-08:002019-02-28T07:23:23.251-08:00DAY 810 - STANDING SUPPORT as 4 BASE CONTACT POINTSI forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the physicality of what it means to support myself in and as every here moment as the regards for my base 4 contact points in and as every here moment as my hands and my feet.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing, understanding and knowing that my hands and my feet are critical to the awareness of myself here as Life Itself.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the grounding awareness effects of commiting myself to move within and as the standing base awareness from within and as the hands and the toes as a way to practically test myself in and as every here moment as what it means to be present in and as my physical body.<br />
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I realize my effectiveness in and as my moment to moment participation is profundly here beyond the limitiations of mind as i commit myself to live from and as my base 4 contact points within and as my physical body.<br />
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I realize there is such extroardinary room and space to play with the very getting to know myself in and as every here moment within the simple awareness of myself in and as my hands and my feet.<br />
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I realize, understand and know that utilizing the hands and the feet as baseline contact support in every here moment supports and expands the awareness of the rest of my body.<br />
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I realize my effectiveness in playing with my hands and my feet as a point of and as physical self-direction and commitment to living here as the physical - I am capable of more than i could have ever imagined.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the gravity of and as my very arch support. Meaning that in heel of myself hear there is both the inside and outside arching of my feet here.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having resisted to extensively investigate the extensive amount of pressure points in and asa the very reflexology of my human physical body that stems from and as the feet itself here.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing, nor really understanding the significance of the support within and as my hands and feet.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize and understand that the awareness of my feet is not dependent upon whether or not i am wearing socks, sandals, shoes, and or are barefoot. I realize I am in fact always barefoot - as i am barefoot within and as my socks, shoes and sandals.<br />
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I commit myself to playing with my awareness and challenging the very play of my awareness within and as the physical.<br />
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I commit myself to making it simple to play with and as the awareness of my hands and feet in and as every here moment.<br />
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I commit myself to share support as what it means to really tune into the experience of ourselves in moving with awareness as both the hands and the feet here.<br />
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I commit myself to express the standing awareness of what it means to in fact regard my physical body.<br />
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I commit myself to continue to express my regards for injury as support in transcending through accepted and allowed suppression as the inner jury manifested an external injury when and as there's been an accumulation of blatant disregeard in and as my physical body.<br />
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I commit myself to supporting my peers with standing awareness in and as every here moment.<br />
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I commit myself to showcase how easy it is to simply commit to utilizing play as a fun and funny way to work with expanding within and as physical awareness/presense Here.<br />
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I commit myself to showcase the continued self-directive movement as what it means to in fact walk the destonian process here.<br />
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Please Take an Additional Moment to Utilize this Document in Combination with my Support Article:<br />
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http://desteni.org/desteni-material/blog/veno-structural-resonance-part-2-phase-9<br /><br />Suggestion - Read Each atleast twice.<br />
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Added Note of Support - The Structural Resonance Documents by Veno are a great way to structure self in living Application when and as there's a specific physical point that is especially noticeable as needing Direct Support.<br />
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It is also generally a good idea to walk through the structual resonance documents as a point of opening up awareness into and as our physicality here - the point of practicality here will be in grounding the information within and as the very creation of our word play applications.<br />
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To Be Continued<br />
<br />Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-35065629252179331542019-02-27T13:48:00.000-08:002019-02-27T13:48:17.231-08:00DAY 809 - Creation is In Word Play Application(s)I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing, understanding, and knowing what it means to create living word Applications - where I In real time - play with my words and test out various applications as myself here in the moment - I realize, understand and know that in testing/experimenting my Living Word Applications, it's an in the moment thing in terms of me moving and speaking as the expressions of myself here. I realize, understand, and know the expression of me comes from a place of silence. I realize, understand and know how to flow within and as the infinite moment of Breath.<br />
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I realize, understand and know that word and world regards is a point of self-movement. I realize, understand and know that my effectiveness in and as my self-movement here is a result of and as the very effectiveness in knowing, understanding, testing, experimenting WITH the very playing and working with and as my words.<br />
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I realize, understand and know that as I investigate my word and word relationships - I am able to see these relationships more clearly - i realize, understand and know that I cannot judge anyone's word and world relationships - I realize, my ability to assist and support myself and so to Life Itself Here - Stems from and as the point of Keep It Simple Stupid. <br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the cryptography of word and world regards - where it's like my words are locked up and are suppressing me untill i in-fact unlock my access to my words in fact - as, Creative Real Time Application(s).<br />
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I realize my ability to communicate effectively and move efficiently in terms of my participation within myself wherever I am in Reality is a result of my self-standing here as Who I am Here as the Living Words and so too my Application Effectiveness. <br />
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I realize, understand and know that my Word Applications are Self-Created as an outflow of my artistic expressions as how I experiment and play with my Words. I realize, understand and know this to be a point of self-movement - to have the self-trust - the knowing inner confidence of Who I am Here. <br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how firewalls work as like behaviour system viruses - specifically when and as I encounter words in my world that are being used in a way that is beyond my current standing, comprehension, ability. <br />
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I realize the self-honesty of myself to ask questions when and as I am uncertain on the point being expressed by another. <br />
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I realize, understand and know - when I speculate on the starting point of another's word usage that I am in fact separating myself from and as myself here and I am for a moment lost in and as self-judgement.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to utilize my words in a a policing type of way where i am demanding and speaking in a way where it's like I am playing authority over another so to speak - I realize I am only every the Authority of myself here - I realize I am Both a Teacher and Student through and through.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to at times get caught up in exploring the depths of myself in word and world regards that I am somewhat inconsiderate of those in my world who do not seem to be interested in challenging their very Living Word and World Regards.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be resistant to humoring those who I see are judging me.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having a tendency to want to deliberately fuck with people I percieve to be judging me in some shape or form. <br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for getting frustrated with myself at times for pushing so hard to engage with others I know are judging me and do not in fact see me for who I am - but only through the mind of limitation as knowledge and information.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding that when I become frustrated with communicating with a peer - it is revealing to me a point of suppression - where it's like I need to simply dumb down the language i am using - and be more simple stupid in a way as like just use a few words and be as direct as possible without getting caught up in the antedote of minsing words so to speak by using many words to say very little -<br />
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I commit myself to be rather substantiat in my each and every communication.<br />
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I commit myself to exersing my capacity to play with my words.<br />
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I commit myself to daily playing as the love in and as my work made visisble.<br />
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I commit myself to sharing my awareness as what it means to create applications as the very answer and solution to the question - 'what it in fact means to play with your words'<br />
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I commit myself to sharing my awareness of how in fact our best work is always inside our best plays - and how with this Regard - The Inverse is also True - That Our Best Plays are within and as The Work We Do.<br />
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I commit myself to share the Equality and Onensss - the Balance as Work and Play Here together as Who we are in fact - beyond the limitations of consciousness.<br />
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I commit myself to utilizing my experiences as examples to show the processes i've walked in fleshing out substantial changes within myself.<br />
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I commit myself to stop expecting people to simply see what is super obvious to me - i realize there's a parent patience process here - the humbleness and humility to walk with someone and not berate them in a way when in fact they are already in a very fragile state and too much intensity can simply crush their spirits<br />
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I commit myself to sharing regard and awareness for the fact that out real potential and life force cannot in fact be crushed - only mind ego bullshit can in fact be crushed and destroyed. I commit myself to exercise both intensity and delicacey in crushing through mind system programming. <br />
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I commit myself to walk my mates to the door of self-change as change itself here.<br />
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I commit myself to letting go of ever 'feeeling the need to explain myself to someone when they come at me with blatant disregard' - I realize sometimes there's a transition process where time alone is required in order to flesh out best case standing alignment here.<br />
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Bonus Shares of Reflection for Today:<br />
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EQAFE - EVERY QUESTION ANSWERED FOR ALL OF EXISTENCE<br /><br />https://eqafe.com/p/brandon-lee-part-1-life-review<br />
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https://eqafe.com/p/brandon-lee-part-2-life-review<br /><br />https://eqafe.com/p/brandon-lee-part-3-life-review<br />
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To Be Continued<br />
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<br />Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-12931357308169970112019-02-26T08:00:00.002-08:002019-02-26T08:00:26.427-08:00DAY 808 - I ENVY YOU CHARACTER SYSTEMLet's Start with Some Basic Definition Regards for Envy from Commonly Sourced Dictionaries:<br />
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ENVY as a Noun (person, place or thing):<br />
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1. A Feeling of Discontented or Resentful Longing Aroused by Someon Else's Possession's, Qualities of Luck.<br />
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Synonyms (similar words):<br />
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Spite, Jealousy, Desire, Resentment, Biterness, Discontent, Enviousness.<br />
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2. A Person or Thing that Inspires Envy<br />
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Synonyms:<br />
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Best, Finest, Pride, Top, Cream, Pick, Choice, Elite, Prize, Jewel, Jewel in the Crown, Flower, Paragon (A person or thing regarded as a Perfect Example of a Particular Quality - Viewed as a Model of Excellence), Leading Light, Glory, <span data-log-string="synonyms-more-click"><span>The Crème de la Crème</span></span><br />
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ENVY as a Verb (action word):<br />
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1. Desire to have a Quality, Possession, Or Other Desirable Attribute Belonging (to someone else)<br />
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Synonyms:<br />
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Begrudge, Grudge<br />
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2. Desire for Oneself (Something possessed or enjoyed by Another)<br />
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Synonyms:<br />
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Covet, Be Covetous Of, Desire, Aspire to, Wish For, Want, Long For, Hanker After/For, Be Consumed with Desire For, Crave, Have One's Heart Set On,<br />
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Informal: "Have the Hots For"<br />
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BASIC SELF-FORGIVENESS to Support Purity of Word and World Regards as Our Best Regards:<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing, understanding and knowing both sides of Envy as the Positive Attributes and the Negative Attributes.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to get caught up in Envy without realizing it when and as I become 'sided'.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the care taking in particular with Envy as a point of utmost regards otherwise it's easy to slip into the field of battle so to speak as less than my living of my Best Regards.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become offended when and as someone tells me that they are envious of me and my lifestyle.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become burdened within Envy.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the Similiarity and Same Difference within and as the Energetic Physical Addiction to Envy as Both a Positive Energy Addiction and a Negative Energy Addiction. I realize, understand, and know that if I am Charged within the word in any way - there's a point of cognitive dissonance within myself that requires effective remediation to fine tune my standing in awareness as the Living Word Itself Here as Always Best - Structurally Sound - Well Built - Harmonious Clarity.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the ridiculousness of getting caught up within and as positive and negative word Regards from the perspective of Feeling and Emotion Experiences Based on My Interpretation of the Words themselves Here. I realize, understand and know this to be a point of personal self-accountability as the what it meanns to be a responsible human as the care taking regards for our Words In Fact - as Our Words Create and Shape the World as a Whole Here.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the propensity to go into Attack Mode when and as I am Frustrated within and as a Point of Envy.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing, understanding and knowing the deeper dimensions of Envy.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to beat myself up when and as I experience friction in my reality where my reality is showcasing to me a clear dissonance in terms of standing awareness in and as the Living Words. I realize, understand and know my personal responsibility as a care taker in this world to the purity of word and world regards.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to daily practice the fine tuning of my vocabulary as what it means to live words as the showcassing of my very regards for the world as what is best for all life in all ways here. I realize the personal responsibility to daily investigate, play with, test - as i realize it is in the Testing as my showcasing Application Effectiveness or Ineffectiveness that I am able to Fine Tune and or Expand or Contract on and as the very self-created Application In Fact.<br />
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I commit myself to utilizing Envy as an Example to Support Myself and My Peers as I realize I share a world and word body with my Peers. I realize All Life Here is my Peer - Equal and One as Life Itself here in this One World/Word Class of Play as what it means to Love as Our Work is Made Visible.<br />
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I commit myself to utilize Envy as a template living example to asssist and support the expansion of my living effectiveness in terms of taking the time in space to open up my standing awareness within each and every word I have not substantiated and in fact tested effectively over time and space - i realize Envy also to be a tool of refinement for the words I have in fact created cool Applications for and as The Living of Myself Here - I realize within the Outlook and Regard, "A Day is Lifetime and Then Sum/Some"...That new life opportunities/presents emerge always to assist and support the process play and working of Fine Tuning Our best Structural Alignment.<br />
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I commit myself to opening up and exploring the humor within and as my darkness as the less than talked about finer points of humanity as the detective willing to investigate all things here and Share the Best Regards.<br />
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I realize my self-responsibility in Opening Up and Sharing Standing Awareness not only for First Myself - But So to All My Peers as the Gift of Giving - The Very Epitome of Live to Give and Treat my Mates with my Best Treats. I realize the Best Treatment so to Speak is in Sharing and Showcasing My Best Regards.<br />
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I realize, understand and know that my Best Regards are rather extensive in terms of abilities, skills, and talents and within this there is also a delicate balance of tenderness, gentlenss, humility, humbleness and humor as what it means to walk with another unconditionally...regardless of where they are at in and as the process of word and world purification Here. <br />
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I realize, understand and know that sometimes there becomes misunderstanding in the very living and sharing of our best regards and that sometimes it's best to let things go for a moment as one part of multiple parties requires time and space to flesh out new found realizations alone so to speak as the very point of self-inestigation sometimes requires a step back in order to take two or more steps forward as the coming all together standing awareness Here.<br />
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<br />Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-25974527497056045972019-02-25T08:58:00.002-08:002019-02-26T07:01:20.875-08:00DAY 807 - TAKING OFFENSE AS THE ULTIMATE DEFENSEI forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the extent to which I've become a masterful defensman in that I can defend any position I am In for Better or for Worse as I've battled tested myself countless times and I always come back from Battle with More Strength, Ability and Agility in the ways in which I am able to Know Myself Here.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to manipulate myself without fear of consequence into every position i could and couldn't conceive possible.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the extent to which I've literarly got the attitude of fuck fear in that I will fight through any and all self-imposed limitations - even if that means momentairly making a real ass hat out of myself.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to for moments in time get caught up in the corss fires of my physical addiction to inner friction where it's like I can super charge a flying high inpentrable defense as like the ultimate defense and basically take myself to the breaking point - where i eventually must quite literarly piece myself back together again.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for taking the approach of 'the ultimate fighter' to heart where it's in mean to beat the bullshit out of myself no matter what - and if it gets messy than that is just par for the course.<br />
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the gravity of the intensitify of myself as i've literaly walked a process of crushing every point of bother within myself into oblivion.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the extent of my stamina and endurance as the very propensity and patience to keep going into a point whern all seems lost, unknown and unfamiliar - I realize that in many ways this has been my saving grace - the flip side of the coin so to speak - that my weakness has in fact being my greatest strength - the willingness to fight for my standing, walking, living awareness of what it means to stand up for myself no matter what - no matter what i face i will surivive and thrive - and that like a fine wine i only become stronger as like I am Here as strength and conditioning as what it means to give myself everything I got.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not totally understanding the extent to which I've been throwing my weight around and just how extensively intsensively i've been pressing upon myself in order to crush my suppression and birth myself a new - that do to the extensive nature of physical addiction within and as the very susbtance of myself here - i've literarly been breaking myself down from the inside out as a way to flesh out and change - spiting my spite in fact and killing my ego as any ideas and perceptions i have about myself as any concern for protecting myself in survival mode here - taking a thrashing somewhat perhaps reckless approach of literally diving head first into what ever is at hand - coming from a place of knowing deep down that I am willing to face whatever it is no matter what.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for using all of existence in a way as like sort of with me but also against me from the perspective that each is in the process of preventing crash landing here on earth as playground planet awesome - within this outlook and regard as one of the many space ships here - I realize it's not a race to the bottom so to speak - and that it is in fact in my best and so to all of life itself here - the best interest of all - to humor myself here - as to like chirp the shit literally out of myself and sharing the gold that i've created from and as the planting and rebirthing of myself a new - here.<br />
<br />
I realize understand that in many ways my propensity towards competing and competition and making sport in so many ways my religion as like a life religion as sport itself here - i've created a playing field of Best Regards - and within this - I am walking a process of standing in Physical Awareness Here as what it means to Be a Team Player as the Captain of My Own Ship and a Mate to All Other Ships Here. I Realize the Grounding Physical Birthing Process isn't so much a competition of sorts as like some make it and some don't with the race of the human race limitted type initial thinking of winners and losers - no that is the grave error of the epitome of an amazing disgrace - in fact the matter of reality here is a sort of tag team assist and support as like making the golden parachute real in fact as all together here we slow down as we approach the ground - literally forming the 'eye' of the needle together as what it means to hold hands and walk this world together - all here - in and as part of the life circle and cycle itsel here - facing each other as all the faces of existence here as the formless form - like the eggman/woman....beyond sex.....simply eggs here.<br />
<br />
I realize the extensive nature in which I've been willing to challenge the living application of myself to the point where i've literally taken myself to the edge of standing to the point of tragic fall - only to everytime realize my footing and standing and the specificty in growing pains as the very labor pains in doing the work necessary to flesh out my best standing here.<br />
<br />
I realize I've been a real beast of sorts in my living both for better and for worse - depending on the moment of sorts as i've been a fighter through and through as the very process of walking understanding as my inferior position to all life here as equal and one - into and and as the standing awareness of what it in fact means to stand here as life physical susbtance in fact - substantially living and creating myself here - fine tuning my effectiveness in communications as my very way of expressing effectiveness in application.<br />
<br />
I commit myself to the Best Regards of Myself and So to Everyone Here as an Extension and External Version of MySelf Here.<br />
<br />
I commit myself to Humoring Myself as I realize and in fact know without a shadow of a doubt that I got to the core of me the real gift of humor and humility in what it means to take response ability for myself and my environment and walk the corrections necessary in order to substantiate our best rewards as the very icing on the cake as the celeberated just desert as the recognition and regards for our very best regards here as the epitome of the awe in awesome.<br />
<br />
I commit myself to sharing my standing as the beast of burden here - the ultimate fighter - and so to the ultimate problem solver as the dude willing to crack the code - the very encryption to my programmed software and hardware here - realizing and standing in awareness as the words of life itself here man as what it means to flesh out and change the very nature and fabric of life itself here.<br />
<br />
I realize, understand and know that this is the eye of the needle for real in fact as the stopping and preventing of the crash landing...the crash and burn calamity of to tail spin out of control beyond measure where all is lost as like the giving up on oneself - I realize, understand and know that failure is not an option because I will quite literarlly left in the face of pain when and as I am faced with the point of being poked and pricked to my very core - as I've created a way to play in releasing myself from the suffering i've done onto myself as the very pains and trauma's i've self-manifested as my very missed standing.<br />
<br />
I commit myself to finetuning the living effectiveness of my best sharing communications.<br />
<br />
I commit myself to sharing my best regards as what it means to humor myself and so to my mates - with the dignity and grace as the very living of my utmost potential here.<br />
<br />
I commit myself to honoring myself as the work made visible here as what it means to in fact live for real without hesitattion - the courage and honor of my very best self-regards - a real pleasure to share Here.<br />
<br />
I commit myself to sharing the humor in humoring myself as You is Me in Another Life Here as we are all in this together as Individual Parts of The Same Substance/Fabric of Existence/Life Here Man.<br />
<br />
<br />
To Be ContinuedMike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-54828490702010597652019-02-24T19:08:00.001-08:002019-02-24T19:08:42.267-08:00DAY 806 - PHYSICAL ENERGY ADDICTION - DEEPER DIMENSIONSI forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing nor ever really investigating the extent to which i exist in and as physical addiction to energy by virtue of the fact that i have a physical body.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for discounting the very physical substance of myself Here.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself fro accepting and allowing myself to excuse the extent to which I have neglected to investigate my physical substance.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding that all physical substance Here is an extenstion/reflection of my physical substance here - one and equal as life itself here.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for never really questioning my early formative years as to how my relationship with my physical substance was in fact Informed.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not really understanding the dynamics of consciousness energy onto my physical substance as like a 'sucking experience'.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing the emotional pain and trauma i experienced in my formative years that was suppressed/repressed because i did not have the vocabulary to specifically define the experience and I in fact trusted in my parents and everyone who entered my environment without even really understanding the nature and design of Permission to accept and allow abuse.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing how I created a victim mentality in my formative years as self-defeated and that I just buried the burdens of my a'parent misfortunes.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the extent to which Sugar was one of the most prominent sooothers for me in terms of easing my discomforts and burried suppression/repression.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for never really investigating why it is that it is so accepted as common as simply not being able to remember too much of my existence here in reality before the age of 5 or 6 years of age.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not really investigating the extent to which everything in this physical reality influences the substance of my physicality here.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to suppress myself to such a great extent that I made myself numb to experiencing the gravity of pain and discomfort in which i carry as burden on a daily basis as the consequence of untapped potential wasting away day by day due to my own neglect.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to polarize myself to such an extent that i didn't even know i was existing in polarity within myself on a physical level where my experiences are perceptions are tainted within and as the physical addiction to energy as my very substance here.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the extent to which I exist Here as Physical Substance.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for never really questioning, 'what does it mean to substantiate and best care for my physical substance here.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for never really questioning my vocabulary to the extent to which the words I apparently know might in fact be tainted within and as my addiction to physical energy.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not really ever considering that deeper dimension of my mind...as my mind being my software to my body physical hardware could influence and perpeutate a sort of closed cycle feedback loop within and as the consumption of myself as the junkie being junked over the years as my physicality is depleted as a result of the very beast of burden that lives within me.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I've been addicted on a physical level to the low, medium and high energy experiences of myself to such an extent that it's all par for the course in terms of coping with the suppression that exists as my univestigated earliy formative year traumas where i did not in fact have an adequate vocabulary developped.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for never ever really considering the consequences of not taking the time to make sure each and every single letter of myself is refined...fine tuned....remediated and in fact stands as a specifically programmed into the flesh sound alignment here. I realize this world is a physically sound reality and that my every word...my every move influences the very nature and design of physical substance here. I realize, understand that abuse cannot exist unless I allow it within myself - that the substance of life itself cannot be abused - only mindconsciousness sytems can be abused in fact.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have the audacity to judge another in any way whatsoever - thining i know better based on the knowledge and information i have within my body as a physical energy addiction system that the mind consciousness system utilizes the ineffective vocabulary of myself to accelerate the feeding frenzy.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that i am better than I am.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to project shit onto others who are in fact expressing their raw in the moment freestyle expressions as the infinite here moment of breath - the very inbetween moment as the - timeless time between consciousness of fear here.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the source of physical energy addiction as fear itself here.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist in a form of self-denial where i've been blissfully ignorant of my own in house keeping as the very garden i tend to.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the extent to which i make sense of things from a corrupted way of thinking - that 'my way' of thinking isn't even in fact my own - because i never took the time to in fact make sure every letter of the alphabet and so too every word of my vocabulary is in fact aligned as structurally sound support here.<br />
<br />
I realize and understand that this is a process of self-realization an ong going day by day fine tuning of sorts as i purify the substance of myself here as life itself here - fleshed out in and as the physical here - the epitome of birthing/grounding myself here as life in fact - matter of fact - as the very matter to the core - the source here.<br />
<br />
I realize the experience of panic comes up often on a deeper dimension of mind as my way of going into the physical energy addiction that i justify as necessary in order to read effectively my environment because my reading ability is tainted within and as an inferior vocabulary. <br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to dismiss the critical nature of vocabulary in terms of my effectiveness as what it in fact means to live as a self-responsible human being.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to half ass my words to the extent that i will believe others who demonstrate a far superior vocabulary and capacity to process here to me - to be in fact fucked and the real abuser here - when in fact the inverse is true. I realize this isn't a point of self-defeat but simply a point of recognition as to where I am at within and as my process journey to life here.<br />
<br />
I realize that like breath - process is a bit byb bit process here - as i purify myself in and as thought, word and deed. I realize, understand and know that there's no time off of process so to speak - that process is a 24/7 playwright as the very self-love here as my work is made visible in the sharing expressions of myself as what it means to flesh out - birth - my best response abilities.<br />
<br />
I realize as I am first responsible for tending to my own nest...my own burdens before i can in fact really assist or tell anyone effectively what it is in fact they must do - i realize that so long as i have unresolves issues inside myself - my effectiveness in supporting others here is limitted. I realize that even though my effectiveness may be limitted it is not in vain - as process is always a 24/7 self reflection here and it's a matter of fact playwright as the author of and as my creation here. <br />
<br />
I realize that within and as the recognition of my creation here - that extends outward as the flowing expression from within myself as the process goes from without to within and from within to without as the very follow through swing of sorts as what it means to live and move here s as the infinite moment of breath.<br />
<br />
I realize, understand that my physical capacity for work is much greater than i give myself credit for - that as the mind is understood, known and in fact utilize as optimum software support to assist the best running / working of and as my physical body/substance here - i am operating in a sort of superior way to the way i previously existed here - and within this there's a responsibility to share the gold so to speak as the standing awareness to best support each one to unlock their utmost potential as what it in fact means to be physically grounded in and as the physical here.<br />
<br />
I realize, understand and know that if I haven't in fact taken the time to develop and refine my vocabulary for me alone - and so to check and re-check my vocabular for any and all necessary remediations - my words to a certain extent are tainted - and I am simply in the process of daily correcting my missalignments as flaws within and as my best word regards.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the similarities to the experience of sex from a mind perspective and the way in which the physical addiction to energy in fact works. I realize, understand and know this to be an eventual moment of 'shortage of breath' where there's even in many instances what seems like a delivberate shortage of breath - where I recogonize i am going into a yawn and i do nothing about it - i realize when and as i go into a yawn...it's an indicator that i haven't been breathing effectively and my mindconsciousness system is about to do a reset - rebooting - which is a compounding of system integration as the very feeding off my physical susbtance here.<br />
<br />
I realize, understand and know that when and as I have difficulty focusing myself effectively and efficiently i am in fact in a physical energy addiction. I realize my ability to focus and listen and reflect attentively is critical. <br />
<br />
<br />
To be Continued <br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-23386281143054210452019-02-23T17:57:00.001-08:002019-02-23T17:57:31.517-08:00Nastyness CharacterNasty Definitions:<br />
<br />
1. Highly Unpleasant, especially to the senses.<br />
2. Behaving in an Unpleasant or Spiteful way.<br />
3. Physically or Mentally Damaging or Harmful<br />
<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be Nasty.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having justified participation within and as Nasty.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having excused participation within and as Nastiness.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to tolerate Nastiness.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react to Nasty with Nasty.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing, understanding the gravity of Nastiness.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for never ever really considering the design of Nastiness within myself and the demonic playout of nastiness as like the forming a relationship in mind in holding onto thoughts about another person - where it's Nasty.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having been Nasty in thought, word and deed.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for perpetuating and feeding the Nastyness Character.<br />
<br />
I realize each and every thought we have forms relationships within ourselves and each one is responsible for the care taking of our inner house as the outter house is a reflection of the inner and so to the greater world here -<br />
<br />
I realize, understand and know that one nasty thought not accounted for spirals out and manifests into more nastiness.<br />
<br />
I realize, understand and know my personal responsiblity for dropping...forgiving...correcting any and all nasty thoughts.<br />
<br />
I realize, understand and know that we do not collectively create anything substantial when and as nastiness is tolerated within ourselves.<br />
<br />
I realize, understand and know the shame within being Nasty.<br />
<br />
I commit myself to being self-accountable for all of my thoughts...realizing that their are dire consequences in beig neglectful for one or a few thoughts. I realize that our thoughts are not excusable and or justifiable...and that if excuse or justification comes up...that is a deeper indication of more self-correction required...more thoughts that need to be accounted for that are currently not being accounted for.<br />
<br />
I realize, understand and know that our thoughts not only influence ourselves but the world as a whole and that there's a real personal integrity and dignity in taking care to correct ourselves for our mistakes.<br />
<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having dismissed...overlooked accountability for myself within and as Nasty.<br />
<br />
I realize, understand and know the ridiculousness within and as Nasty.<br />
<br />
I commit myself to stopping any and all participations within Nastyness.<br />
<br />
Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-54663134131665220282019-02-23T16:36:00.002-08:002019-02-23T16:36:29.625-08:00The Ridiculousness of Being A JerkI forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing the ridiculousness of being a Jerk.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the gravity of Oneness and Equality from and as the Starting point of the Physical. I realize there is an extensive difference from perceiveing Oneness and Equality from a frame of Mind. I realize any and all frames of Mind are in fact limited and can perpetuate a Mind Dissonance in seeing clearly here.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing a warped sense of humor at times where I am playing against everyone and the joke/funny isn't best for all it's a sort of manipulated debt based thing where it's at the expesne of others - I realize, understand and know that this isn't in fact 'real' funny and it's a twisted and manipulated form of abuse. <br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being quick to cut down an individual's character.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being quick to publicly another.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing the finger pointing nature of being a jerk where it's a form of deflection of personal responsibility.<br />
<br />
I forgve myself for accepting and allowing myself for validating/justifying/excusing Jerk like behavior.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to perpetuate Jerk Like behavior by playing copy cat when and as i see and experience something I don't like.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think being a jerk is ok if the people you are engaging are also jerks - I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating stupid reasoning as a way to think myself into being a jerk...as like not wanting to miss out on the action.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to get caught up in the energy of being a Jerk.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to jerk off with my words. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing the personal responsibility in care taking for every word that comes out of my mouth - I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to excuse jerk like behavior.<br />
<br />
When and as I see myself going into Jerk Mode - I stop and breathe - I realize the ridiculousness of being a Jerk - it's really a deeper point of self-neglect...self-sabotage and that there's a point of self-reflection to see in and as the point of what the Jerk represents as a the triger. I commit myself to investigating and being clear on my triggers before any and all responses come from me...I realize sloppy speak is a recipe for diastor and is a real jerk off way to live that isn't helpful to anyone or anything here.<br />
<br />
I commit myself to correcting my misfortunes as my misstakes. <br />
<br />
I commit myself letting go of any apparent need to be a Jerk.Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-32544538492011627962019-02-23T16:16:00.002-08:002019-02-23T16:17:15.906-08:00PHYSICAL ADDICTION – WAR As INNER FRICTION<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
PHYSICAL ADDICTION
– WAR As INNER FRICTION</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to not realizing and understand the
extent to which i've created suppression within my physical body.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to perpetuate a state of war in the
world as an outflow of my very words and inner frictions.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing the extent to
which i've been feeding off my physicality and maintiaing a high like
status of sorts where i am sepearated from being grounded as life
itself Here.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to diminish my best expressions as
a result of becoming preoccupied with the addiction to inner
friction.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to not realize, understand and know
I got caught up in my own mind possession of the manifestation and
play out of my very physical addiction to inner friction.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to welcome fighting and feuding and
attacking and defenses...and all forms of war.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding
the very gravity of my words within myself and how there's been an
extensive addiction within myself to creating friction...where it's
like I am always seeking out ways to squeeze myself from the inside
out ...not realizing the gravity of such behaviours and the
consequence of such a nature.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for looking to pick fights with
anyone and everyone who disagrees with my thinking in some shape or
form.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to make a game out of war.....war
games where it's like i stategize my words in particular way where i
am always right and the other is always wrong if i am engaged in
battle so to speak.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding
the difference of looking through my physical eyes veruss looking
through the eyes of mind as me me me i am so great and better than
the rest.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing my own stupidity
within and as the very fighting within myself and so to the world as
a whole.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to speak abusive language to my
peers.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to justify abusive language as a
result of accepting and allowing it within myself and within this –
i forgive myself for accepting and allowing an attitude of seek and
destroy...and crushing it....crushing whatever i do not agree with as
like the very being addicted to the positve energy experience that is
extracted from the negative energy of myself within my physical
body.....the experience is like that of a squeezing and sucking..</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to jump at the war games
opportunity to talk shit about weed as a way to invoke reactions in
others....thinking weed needs to be defended as a point that is
overly misrepresented as being evil.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for wanting to make weed out to be
like a hero sort of thing – not realizing my own games within
myself.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to consume myself within fighting
and putting other people down.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing the extent to
which i put myself down...and then retaliate by taking it out onto
existence as a whole...not realizing the gravity of my misconduct.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to get caught up in my own neglect.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to discount the extent to which
i've become addicted to fighting...especially as form of
chirping....also known as talking shit. I forgive myself for
accepting and allowing myself to talk so much shit to myself and so
to all of existence.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to resist listening.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing the
ridiculousness of resisting to listen.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to take great offense to the war on
drugs and within this...i forgive myself for accepting and allowing
myself for not realizing and understanding the Physical Addiction
manifestation...the very war maching of the world system in
fact....the very money printing press of heinous abuse that is both
justified and excused as being logical.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to believe and buy into the
thinking ....the very war game thinking ...that i simply need to
channel friction outward so to speak...as like the very belief that
my creativity comes from a place of friction...and that if i do not
have some sort of frcition within myself...than i cannot in fact move
very easily and or be effctive in speaking and or communicating.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing to disregard Life Itself Here.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to isolate myself from Life Itself
Here.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing how important it
is to walk as a group and not be a solo missionary fighter so to
speak – because in going it alone solo styles...where there's like
this disregard from needing anybody's help....it's a point of
suppression in fact...it's a point of fighting....the very creation
of friction and war in and as the world here.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding
how the world system of consciousness in fact functions as the war
machine for profit. <br />
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to become lost for a moment within
walking alone the world system of money.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to have an attitude that nobody can
really help me like i can help myself...and that the only way to
really flesh things out is through consequence.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to create an extensive relationship
of suppression within my physical body to such an extent where it's
like this addiction to pain and suffering and it's mostly glossed
over to such an extent that even when i experience such great
pains...i look to self medicate myself with laughter.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I do realize that
laughter as a medicine is very effective in letting go and forgiving
onself. I do realize that my awareness into comedy has come from the
serious investigations into my own in house
fighting...pains...frustrations...difficulties.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I realize the
funny and the comedy is so much so the flip side of seriousness and
the two are intinsically related. I realize i've had a real tendency
to take things too far in terms of Not
Stopping...earthing...grounding myself here through breath. I
realize this is the physical addiction to positive energy.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I realize i've
been experimenting a great deal in a variety of ways...and that i've
made some mistakes in terms of giving/gifting/sharing my best with
reality.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing the gravity of my
inner reality and so to my outter reality to such an extent that it
is shameful to see that i could be so careless.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to abuse my physical body and so to
the body of all life here as the phsyical substance made manifest.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to think it cool to hevaily
attack...and call out people's weaknesses. I forgive myself for
accepting and allowing myself to jusitfy attacking people in what i
perceive as weaknesses...not realizing and understanding the full
gravity of my own weaknesses in standing as life itself here.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to justify and excuse a physical
addiction to inner conflict and friction....thinking that suppression
in any form or shape is valid way of existing. I forgive myself for
accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the
extent to which I've been able to wrestle with myself mostly into
submission of various positions...while still holding myself in and
as a state of 'in house fighting'.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for thinking that process should
become more about fighting as a way to create change that is best in
the world. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to
derive positive eneregy experiences from fighting.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding
this positive energy addiction to friction itself has been a survival
system within myself...as like how to fight for my right to exist
here in this world system.....i forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself for not realizing the extent to which I have been a
prolific abuser that preys upon others.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding
the extent of my physical addiction to friction.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to exist like a pirate of
sorts...where it's like i just go around and dont think too much
about what i say or do and just kind of in the moment let things
happen....within this i forgive myself for accepting and allowing
myself for not realizing the extent to which the world system of
money has been somewhat automated within myself as like the war for
profits so to speak.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to neglect consideration for all
the suffering in the world...and especially so for the children
throughout the world.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to create a disgraceful display of
my behavior to my peers and acquaintances.
</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to spit in the face of life itself
here – by talking and spewing so much bullshit.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to momentairly throw my whole
process journey out the window so to speak as like becomming so
possesed in my addiction to inner friction...and becomming so
obsessed with engagement as a point of friction that i was having a
feeding friendzy of sorts. I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself to tolerate such heinous abuse in myself and so to
the world. I realize this playout to be supportive in allowing me to
see the gravity of my programming in the physical....where it's like
it's some work for me to flesh out best change in terms of actually
matter of fact grounding and walking myself here consistently step by
step without wavering in any way shape of form in terms of my in the
moment breath awareness regards and stand.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I realize this is
a wake up call for me – and a crash landing prevention as i've
received the memo from all my peers who have been so increible in
support and assistance to aid me in standing up within and as my
mind/body addcition to friction.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I reaalize,
understand and know the point – till here no further – as i will
not accept and allow myself to be so callous in and as my word
pariticpations.
</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I realize i simply
cannot justify the talking of some seriously abusive shit...i realize
that form of conduct is exactly what proliferates hell on earth.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I realize it is my
responsibility to remeidate the consequences of my actions...and that
it is an ongoing process play as this is quite a serious point of
regard as this fighting is why the world is the way it is as a
whole...in terms of all of us humans here and how we are in fact
co-existing. I realize i have a responsibility to live and express
that which is best for all life and that does not mean cherry
picking who i will abuse and fight...that it is simply unacceptable
to be abusve with our words.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for misusing my words and
consequnetly millitarizing my words as weapons so to speak and bombs
of confusion and delusion.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I realize it's
actually in fact so ridiculous to be addicted to fighting and
feuding...becuase what that means is
destruction/abuse/violence/suppression to living my utmost potential
</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive mself
for accepting and allowing myself to carry a burden as what it means
to walk the process journey to life – a burden in that it's like
believing that i just got to keep fighting my way here – not
realiing that is a really stupid starting point – like 'just got to
fight my way here – i mean think of every human saying that...as
their starting point of being here – i mean we get a situation
where everyone is like a chicken with their head cut off...and going
arund with abslutely no self-direction whatsoever in any way shape or
form.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for attempting to superimpose
self-direction for myself as like getitng opportunities as a result
of pressing buttons and causing frictions...as a way to advertise and
market myself....i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself
for not realizing and undertsanding how lame i've been within
attacking my peers.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I realize
regardless of whether someone is my 'peer' or not....attacking anyone
isn't really cool. I realize that 'putting people down'' who are in
fact living here – is an abussive point of suppression and a verbal
form of violence and is not a matter to be taken lightly as our words
determine and in fact create the very status of our shared world
here.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
slowing down in breath moment by moment -
</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
stopping the physical addiction to inner friction.
</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
stop abusing myself for an energetic experience.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
stopping in one moment when and as i see my mind kick in as a form of
possession.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
understanding, knowing, and stopping a physical dependency upon the
creation of friction within and as my body.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
grounding myself within and as my body.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
letting go of the fight as the very war on drugs.
</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
taking care to share my best regards.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
the continued practice of best response ability.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
fine tuning my misstakes into substantial self-corrections.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
standing as an example of what it in fact means to live my best word
and world regards as physically grounded here as life itself.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
utilizing my resources effectively to support in the creation of a
world that is best for all life.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
living words as the expression of who I am Here as Life Itself.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
being studious in living my self-corrections.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
making ammends with my mistakes.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
the 'seriousness' of practicality in living self-corrections.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
work and play daily to refine my best living of words as what it in
fact means to live words as life itself here.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
listening.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
taking my time in crafting my best response abilities – realizing,
understanding and knowinig when i move too quick in the moment...that
i become sloppy as it is an opportunity for the mind to step in...and
for lack of a better phrasing...'muck barn'.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
Blame as a Form of
Spite and Justification for Abusive Action:</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to perpetuate abuse in the forms of
blame, spite and justification – where the outflow is a sort of
misdirected blame that comes across as spite that is justified as
acceptable.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I realize the
ridiculousness of creating any sort of reasoning to speak poorly
about another person – i realize it reflects not so much on the
others as it does with my own poor care taking and responsibility
best practiced management.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
When and as I see
myself making a mistake in my words – I grant myself the courtesy
and grace to make necessary corrections. I realize that the sooner i
take action in making self-corrections for my misplaced actions –
the sooner i begin the healing process for the consequnces of abuse
done onto myself and so the world as my words are one and equal a
manifestation of the world.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
stopping any and all forms of blame, spite, and justification.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
learning from my mistakes, recognizing the shame in my erros and
utilizing that to support me in preventing unnecessary compunding
repetition of the same grave error.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
Money:</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to justify abusive language onto
another as a result of feeling wronged, betrayed and or cheated out
of money.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to support fighting for money.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for holding onto a belief that in
order to create substantial amounts of money in this world one must
be an agitator and a disruptor of sorts in order to stir the
pot...and therefore creating momentum of energy.
</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to sabotaging my body for money.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
When and as I see
myself going into conflict with someone about money – i stop and
breathe, i realize that perpetuating war doesn't in fact support best
case solutions. I commit myself to challenging myself to speak with
the grace of forgiveness and from the heart.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
Sorrow:</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to beat myself up momentairly upon
realizing the error in my ways/actions.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to talk shit to myself.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing others to talk shit to me.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to think that the best response to
shit talking is more shit talking.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to deflect from self-reflection
when I experience immediate sorrow in realizing the errors of my
actions. I realize that it is not acceptable and till here no futher
can i allow even a moment of wallowing as a result of realizing my
mistakes. I realize it is a waste of time to have a pity party in
any way for any amount of time.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to utilize sorrow as a means and
justification for fighting in my environment..most specifically with
the way i engage my words with others.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding
the pains within my body.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to distract myself from the pains i
experience in my body.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I forgive myself
for accepting and allowing myself to cope with discomforts...fighting
so to speak...as like just kicking my own ass into movement.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
When and as I
experience Sorrow – I stop and breathe – I look and see the
specifics of the sorrow – I forgive myself and move onward without
the baggage/limitation.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
I commit myself to
taking immediate action in recognizing when and as I experience
sorrow. I realize my best action is self-corrective action. I
realize the process play is a matter of fine tuning my best regards.</div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="background: #ffffff; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-17176038412705172722019-02-19T10:21:00.000-08:002019-02-19T10:22:06.768-08:00DAY 802 - THE FLOW as KEY To CREATING Through Effective APPLICATION<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHPkdobqyA52z5IgjfkN1455EBK-mvKOlZfov0SqKkiby7YMW2S5EVUHc2WqGPkdK6HR6bM6VB-C3s9hF-T11qdG8vO939H-lljSsgPM09APtQERJxNDb5UiEuamJPZygMk__GOqXJnQ2n/s1600/capoeira.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="487" data-original-width="720" height="216" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHPkdobqyA52z5IgjfkN1455EBK-mvKOlZfov0SqKkiby7YMW2S5EVUHc2WqGPkdK6HR6bM6VB-C3s9hF-T11qdG8vO939H-lljSsgPM09APtQERJxNDb5UiEuamJPZygMk__GOqXJnQ2n/s320/capoeira.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
It's Easy to Get Caught in a "Hiccup" and Spiral into a Panic as a Sort of LackLuster Self-Indulgent form of Being Like "Stoned"..."Like a Stone" within Yourself in Terms of Being a "Control Freak" as Like on "Total Lock Down Suppression". It's Fascinating Because to Hold onto Knowledge and Not Live Words as the Sollution and Applications Here is Riiiiiiiiiiiiiidiculous. I mean how many Dicks do You NEED to Fuck Yourself With?<br />
<br />
Seriously - The Vulgarity is a Bit Necessary.<br />
<br />
It's Like We Live in a Collective Shit Storm and Everyone is Mostly Afraid of Getting Shit On. And It's like Holding onto Bullshit is a Sort of Accepted Defense Mechanism of Coping with..and is a Lame Playing of the World's Smallest Violin as like Creating an Illusion that It is Cool to Moan and Groan about One's Suppressed Agony - Not Real Eyes To See the Narrative the Actual In Fact - Matter of Fact - Self-Creation Here as the Very Doctor who Doctored the Script - I mean Self-Reflection ...Self-Recognition 101.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not Realizing what it In fact Means to Live "FLOW as KEY to CREATING through Effective APPLICATION".<br />
<br />
I Realize as the Real Eyes to See and Know as the very Living Experience that I flesh Me Out as Life Itself Here - Birthed from the Physical - In and As Every Here Moment of Movement.<br />
<br />
AKA - THE FLOW.<br />
<br />
I commit myself to The ReMarkAbility of SLOW FLOW.<br />
<br />
I Know without a MotherFuckingDoubt My Speed and Agility in and as My Stellar Respons Ability Has Emerged as a Continuous Labored Effort of Birthing Myself as Life from the Physical - Literally, Physically - Fleshing Out - Every Single Day - One Sound Bite At a Time - One Breath at a Time.<br />
<br />
AKA - Renaissance Man<br />
<br />
I commit myself to Demonstrating What it In Fact Means to be a #worldclassplayer Here as the Answer and Solution to the Question: "What does It Mean to Be a Responsible Human Being?"<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to Become Like this Stoner Who Doesn't Even Smoke Weed But Simply Becomes Stoned Within My Mind of Inferior Thinking Programs - Not Realizing How In Fact I Create Refractions as that Which I use to Bind Myself as Like my Body the Substance Being Bound to Inferior Word Regards as the Spewing and Parroting of Lame ASS Bullshit.<br />
<br />
I Real Eyes To See My Personal Response Ability to Self-Accounting In and as My Every Word.<br />
<br />
I Commit Myself to Educate and Support People Who Have No Standing Awareness as How to Utilize Marijuanna as a Process Point of Support in Substantiating Oneself as the Living Flesh Here Man - Deliberately Working With Every Supression and Investigating Every Ounce of Weakness and Self-Imposed Limitation to the Point where Fear No Longer Becomes this Conditioned Lame Ass Bullshit and the PAINS of Self-Accepted Inferiority Stoner Like Bullshit Can Be Forgiven and Forgotten Once and For All.<br />
<br />
AKA - wordlclassplayer<br />
<br />
AKA - Renaissance Man<br />
<br />
AKA - Destonian Original Gangster<br />
<br />
I Real Eyes to SEE that this In FACT - Practically Means My WORDS are MY STEPS - My VERY Embodiment of LIVING ACTION - as The WHO I AM HERE MAN - The Very Epitome of Me as the Living Flesh Word Man - Also Known as a WordSMITH - A Man, A Real Dude WHO Gives a Fuck about the World as a Whole and the Classification of Everyone Here in the One Class together as the Eventual Follow Through Realization that the Party Is Here - Heaven on Earth Man - and that Each is the GateKeeper and the Custodian to the Kindgom of Heaven as Earth Itself Here - Fleshed Out as Our Movement from the Pulse as the Grace of Living out BPM's as the Beats Per Minute Performance Vibing from Our MotherFucking HEART,<br />
<br />
SEE HE ART as the Very wordclassplayer HERE<br />
<br />
#Increible As The very In FACT AweSoMe Amazing as the I am Singing within and as my Sound as the very Expression and Example of what it Means to Live the Solution as the FLOW.<br />
<br />
I commit myself to Sharing my Art as What it Means to In Fact Move as Life Itself Here - One and Equal as The Living Flesh - The Dude Who Adventures and Journey's Always All Ways Here Man - as The VeryBest Living of, "BEST REGARDS"<br />
<br />
I mean,<br />
<br />
Common Sense.<br />
<br />
lololololol.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bonus Shares:<br />
<br />
<a href="https://steemit.com/philosophy/@research-mind/finacial-scarcity-is-artificially-created-times-are-a-changing">Financial Scarcity Is Artifically Created - Times are a Changing</a><br />
<br />
<a href="https://steemit.com/philosophy/@worldclassplayer/natural-flow-is-sometimes-forgotten-and-or-neglected-oooops">Natural Flow Is Sometimes Forgotten and or Neglected - Oooops</a><br />
<br />
<a href="http://desteniiprocess.com/">desteniiprocessPro</a><br />
<br />
<a href="https://eqafe.com/">EveryQuestionAnsweredForEveryone</a><br />
<br />
<br />
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<br />
<br />Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-31320218663923422202019-02-18T09:26:00.001-08:002019-02-19T08:25:25.745-08:00DAY 801 - FOLLOW THROUGH - The What It Means to Go Back to Basics and Flesh Out and Substantiate Living ChangeThe Living of Words is a Back and Forth Re: Our Action the Very Best Play Working Together as the Regard to Our Moment to Moment Best Response Ability - An OnGoing Flowing Work of Art as the Artist Here - The Within and Without as the Very Art Through the I Am Creator Here.<br />
<br />
It's Easy and Hard - depending on the Narrative broadcast.<br />
<br />
We are Always All ways Playing the Narrative Broadcaster - The Man/Woman of SPIN. The Ball Spins and We Be Ballers whether We Like It or Not. I was Once Gifted with a Suggestion. That Suggestion Being to: "Learn to Like that Which I Don't Like".<br />
<br />
Within the Investigations of, "Learn to Like that Which I Don't Like" - I learned Many New Things About Myself - Worked through the Design of 'Self-Defeat' as a Form of 'Self-Suppression'. It's fascinating to SEE How We Compartmentalize Things/Words within Ourselves/OurCells. It's a Vocab Vocation of Sorts in Making the Decision to be A Living Word Playing Participant Here. It's the Best Way to Live, "Self-Accountability"....which, is the Epitome of "Self-Honesty" the very ability to COUNT...the Mathematics of Our Vocabulary...Our Words as How We Stand/Sit/Lie Within and Without - the Very Throughout Existence as Existence Itself Broadcasting Live Here Man.<br />
<br />
Giving Credit:<br />
<br />
Carlton Tedford - A Real Destonian OG - He May Say He Came a Little Bit Late to the Party...But Whatever...He's A Real Lyrical Dancer that Has Supported Me Greatly with His Blogging Dedication and Consistency to the 7 Year Journey to Life Process as the 'I am Living Words Here'.<br />
<br />
The Timing is Epic.<br />
<br />
We've Reached a ProFound Point of Structual Alignment - Sound Here -<br />
<br />
Suggest Hit Pause for a Moment - Take a Stretch - Do some Capoetta - and Return Here to:<br />
<br />
DAY 800, 'The Sanctification of Investigation' <a href="https://carltontedford.wordpress.com/2019/02/17/day-800-the-sanctification-of-investigation/">DAY 800, 'The Sanctification of Investigation'</a><br />
<br />
I ForGive MySelf for Accepting and ALLowing MySelf to Not Realize Very Specifically What it in Matter of Fact Means for Me to Go Back to Basics in and as my Journey to Life Process Here Man.<br />
<br />
I Real Eyes for Me it is to FINE TUNE the Living of My Words as the Structures and Foundations I have Created for MySelf Here - to ReInvestigate the Very Scripts I Crafted for MySelf as the very Golden Treasure of Word Regards to Care for the Whole World as One and Equal Here Man.<br />
<br />
I Real Eyes to SEE the Work I've Put into My Flesh as the Living Words I Am.<br />
<br />
I Real Eyes to SEE the PROOF of WORK as the I am the 7 Year Journey to Life Man.<br />
<br />
I Real Eyese to SEE I am FLESHING OUT from Within as the Very Life Process Living, 'As Within and So Without'.<br />
<br />
I Real Eyes to SEE How I Create from the FLESH as the LIVING WORDS I AM.<br />
<br />
I am Here with Real Eyes to See Reality Here - Continuous Precocious Fleshing Out the Abundant Potential Here - So Much So Mining the Life Golden Nuggets as the 'Pure Gold Expression' of All Together Here Man - Oneness and Equality - The Epitome of Living Words.<br />
<br />
I Realize the Pace of Play and Work - One and Equal, Always All Ways Together Here - Is the Grace As Breathing with Ease As the Easy Play to Make As the Best Response Ability In the Moment As the Very Game Time Decision to Stand Up and Make a Play Working Out of Regard for the Play In Working Ourselves Out Here - As Within and So Without.<br />
<br />
I Real Eyes to See How My Playing Creation Here Stem and Branch Out from the Depth of My Core which is Rooted in My Heart as Where I am Planted Here Firm and Solid as Life Itself Birthed Here Man - The Living Words Made Manifest - The Epitome of What It Means to Self-Actualize as the very Self-Made Version of My Utmost Potential Here - The willingness to Do My Best 24/7 Always All Ways - The Commitment as the Very Living Understanding into Awareness as the Science and Philosophy of AweSoMe.<br />
<br />
I Real Eyes to See the Extraordinary within and as the Infinite Moment Between Breaths Here - As Within and So Without as the HOLD is the BeHolder of Life Itself Here Man<br />
<br />
I Realize the Process Playwright of Gestation as an Ongoing Fleshing Out So to Speak as the Very Process Play of the Integrity and Dignity within Sharing Our Best Support.<br />
<br />
I Real Eyes to See the Role of Influence in Walking With and Supporting my Fellow Mates as a Team Player in the Group of worldclassplayers Here - I Real Eyes to See the Individual Expressions within and as the Group Dynamics Here - The Very ALONE and Together Here as ALL ONE MAN.<br />
<br />
I Real Eyes to See and Explain the Various Veils of Separation - The FireWalls that Activate a Psychosis of Mind Consciousness Systems. I Real Eyes to See How the Codification of Consciousness Works as the Imprinting of Fine Polarizations as the Self-Defeatist System Weakness and Vulnerability.<br />
<br />
I Real Eyes to See How the Imprinting of Fine Polarization as the Self-Defeatist System Weakness and Vulnerability - Is Actually a Hidden in Plain Sight, Bitcoin Like Golden Nugget of Support - a Key to Substantial Investigations - Creating an Optimum Structure to Work With in Terms of Word and World Regards as the Very Harmonizing of Ourselves Here - Living Words.<br />
<br />
The Funny and Fun Thing about 'Self-Defeat' is in and as the Process of STANDING SOLID AND FIRM ON OUR FEET.<br />
<br />
OUR FEET is an Indicator and Cross Reference of Our WALK...Our Very Talk as the Living Words Here Man. The 'Feat' in DeFeat is quite the Feat as it is a 'Feature Presentation' of Sorts as the Very Ways to Work the Sanctification of Investigation of the Get Down, Got Down, Digging DEEP All the Way to The Core of Myself Here.<br />
<br />
See it's never so much about good or bad as this "versus" way of thinking where there's a sort of 'war' in the Versus - it's more of a Duet of Sorts as the 'Verses" Always All Ways be Complimentary Support Here as What is Always Best for Life.<br />
<br />
There's Only Ever One Real Broadcast Here and it is the Heaven On Earth as Life Itself Here Man Always Always Broadcasting the Equal Money System as the Very Epitome of What it Means to Live Words Here as the Unification of Man - Oneness and Equality Styles.<br />
<br />
HAHA<br />
<br />
lolololololol.<br />
<br />
There's a tendency at times to want to go overboard with explanations to sort of 'proove it' it's a compensation of 'over explanation' in playing into the rhetoric of 'justification'...the very, 'another minds justification theory..won't you join in and take the bait of the debate...the circle jerk...knee jerk reaction as the fight for a side at the table - not reallizing it's the Life Round Table Here as the Multi-Dimensional Beingness Here Man.<br />
<br />
One and Equal is the Abundant Access to Our Best Playing Potential as we are All It - The Very "i" and "t" - Cross Your Eyese and Dot your Tees for it's Our Gift to SHARE the Process Playwright - the very Oneness and Equality to the Tag You're It #worldclassplayer<br />
<br />
<br />Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-74351510682636918012017-04-17T19:31:00.000-07:002017-04-17T19:31:05.407-07:00day 800 - Integrity of SharingSee the full share here:<br />
<br />
https://steemit.com/life/@worldclassplayer/integrity-of-sharing<br />
<br />
<br />
Note: If You are Not in Fact familiar with Steemit, You should! There's a lot of reasons why. At the very least...it can change your life for the better.Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-70961997643062624822017-04-17T19:26:00.000-07:002017-04-17T19:26:31.408-07:00Day 799 - Desteni and Dignity See the whole story here:<br />
<br />
<span>https://steemit.com/desteni/@worldclassplayer/dignity-and-desteni-my-vistit-to-the-desteni-farm-and-my-potential</span><br />
<span><br /></span>
<span><br /></span>Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-29838597372221567832017-03-22T01:03:00.000-07:002017-03-22T01:03:09.254-07:00Day 798 - SteemitSteemit, a new blogging, social networking platform that is connected to a crypto currency. Get paid to play in sharing your best posts. Fascinating structure with steemit...it is still very early stages of development. My best suggestion is check it out and start playing with it.<br />
<br />
https://steemit.com/desteni/@worldclassplayer/steemit-allow-me-to-introduce-myself-mikedestonianmcdonaldMike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-47724918364721784572017-03-17T20:11:00.000-07:002017-03-17T20:11:09.513-07:00Day 797 - Work, PhysicalI forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize nor really question or in any way investigate the nature and expression of "Work".<br />
<br />
Do I like work, Yes.<br />
<br />
Work has been a point of sloppiness within myself in so many ways because Discipline has been a point of weakness within myself in relation to living "Work, Physical".<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize this 'go with the flow automation of my mind' has not been supporting me to be physical and work here in ways that are great. I realize i've been too flexible within my mind in the sense that Discipline has been lacking as my best discernment. <br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resist the work required in exercising a plan effectively - where for example i make a plan the night before as a physical support in how i can best participate and support myself through my day....and then when the day is here, go into an experience of emotional discomfort and preoccupation that comes up in me where I am willing to give priority to this 'breaking news story' that has just aired inside myself as the networked consciousness channeling of myself as fear/energy.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize and understand how I polarized discipline within myself to be preferenced based according to my consciousness energy definition...where the mind is dictator in that the discipline...or lack there of real living Discipline is biased towards getting the positive energy high. I realize this is a distraction, and for myself has been a preoccupation i did not fully understand.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize and understand how for the most part, I've feared myself here as Resistance. Meaning, it's always been that part of me that i havent wanted to give credence to - 'the bad, the darker parts of self'. I realize the experience of myself as Resistance has been mostly Inferiority, with little bits of superiority glossed on top from time to time to keep me fueled in and as mind automation - running, without regard for the implications, stress, strain, pressure, tension onto and into me as my physical body.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to Resist myself.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize and understand myself as 'Resistance'.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to suppress the best expression of Resistance within and as myself here.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to Fight Resistance within and as a point of good versus bad. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have limited my definition and understanding of the experience of Resistance inside my physical body. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to neglect reflection into and as my relationship with Resistance.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realizing and understand the harmony in body and mind with Resistance. Where it's the point of force within and as our movement...it's a point of will...like that of breath. The resistance does not require to be intense pressure...however it can be. I realize i created much intense pressure within my body as a result of not understanding the dynamics of myself within and as Resistance.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to mindfuck myself in relation to Resistance where I accept and allow myself to be Inferior to Resistance, while hiding in delusions of grandeur in my mind as the sort of distraction/preoccupation logic of making sense of non sense to superimpose excuses and justifications on to myself and others. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize and understand how ive fueled the dissonance resistance movement within myself. I realize in attempting to understand and live my best potential - An important emphasis in accounting specifically for my daily living words - specifically the Regard within and as Word. I realize my strategy of understanding and learning has been through the consequence of suppression. I realize this is an inferior approach to Life. Less than. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to justify suppression of myself in thinking that i always need to challenge myself in decision making....meaning i must always choose that which is difficult.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to justify
suppression of myself in thinking that i always need to challenge myself
in decision making....meaning i must always choose that which is
difficult.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize nor understand the stress and strain i have built up within me about decision making...where i've created a relied upon dependency on getting whipped by myself into movement/action.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to negate the best expression of myself as Work, Physical.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize and understand how my best Play has suffered from inconsistency as a result of having constricting conditions on my ability to best manage and direct Work, Physical here.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to suppress the best of myself in daily living myself in my physical body, Working.<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not really understand nor realize the effort within and as myself as Work and Will. I realize growth and maturity are the harvesting results of effectively cultivating the best expressions of resistance...meaning the words we give and gift to our selves as how we create solutions as our very own Instruction Manuals to share with others in how we moved,/breathed through a point of challenge and change<br />
<br />
to be continued<br />
<br />
<br />Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-3939744897792978892017-02-24T16:29:00.000-08:002017-02-24T16:29:33.843-08:00Day 796 - Rigidity Nature and FlexibilityI noticed upon waking up this morning i was a bit stiff and rigid. I experienced a tightness and even a bit of a soreness and stiffness within the middle of the small of my lower back....and also a lot more intensively so in my thighs. Yes, my recent physical activities play a role in my physical body self-reflection and investigations.<br />
<br />
Ironically, i've noticed that my ability to move within physical activities is so much so rooted in the deep psychology of myself here. Meaning, my words....the vocabulary i speak....and how I say what i say...and the outlook I hold as my insight about the particularities of the relationships within and as the activities i engage within.<br />
<br />
What is also very fascinating, is the fact that, I have a whole history of physical impressions layered in me over time on a cellular level as my words imprinted in me since childhood...and in so many ways...what i am realizing and investigating....and working on, is Identifying and correcting my cognitive dissonances. The Interesting thing i have realized is that my cognitive dissonances have manifested in me over time as my reactionary play outs in my movements throughout my days. Meaning, where I would react in a way of Offense or Defense. I noticed I created these offenses and defenses in my behavior conditioning as forms of protection as a result of not really understanding points of conflict/trauma early in my life.<br />
<br />
Ive recently started playing with a structured process of Accountability in my, 'thoughts, words, and deeds.' How this Playing works, is:<br />
<br />
I wake up in the morning...for my new Today.<br />
<br />
I look within my body to see what i am experiencing.<br />
<br />
I challenge myself to be Specific with Identifying a Word to explain and summarize the experience of myself.<br />
<br />
I go into the specifics of the experience within my body...as how i am physically experiencing myself within particular parts of my body.<br />
<br />
From here, I ask myself what word can I gift myself today as a complimentary support for my physical body investigations into the Initial Word I have given Focus to.<br />
<br />
From Here, I see how this complimentary word/action exists within me as a physical body experience. I play around for a moment and realizing myself within and as the physical movement of the particular word I have given focus to.<br />
<br />
I am now set, in and as my structure for my daily living of word and world investigations. What happens from here, is so much so an adventure and undertaking of unpredictable explanations. Meaning, 'it's like setting the table for a meal...you've prepared the lab for a scientific investigation and exploratory journey into yourself that you are going to walk/run in real time as Today. To further clarify: as a result of giving attention to the first word I bring forth, (example: rigidity)...I get to know and understand myself within and as Rigidity throughout my day...I become aware of my acceptances and allowances as this point of Rigidity on a deep level. Memories come to the surface throughout the day as support in showcasing to me how I substantiated the specifics of my behavior patterns.<br />
<br />
I find it supportive to play with both words and get to know myself and even fine tune my definitions as i go with the words I work with in and as my word/world play and participation's from day to day.. <br />
<br />Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-89437992898514328692017-02-11T13:24:00.000-08:002017-02-11T13:24:21.495-08:00Day 795 - I Manipulate with Justification
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to manipulate
myself in my world through Justification where I am existing in and
as a sort of Ignorance of my living of and as the word JUSTIFICATION.<br />
<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to
self-sabotage myself and my participation within my world within and
as the execution of JUSTIFICATION to make sense of my accepted and
allowed abdications of my best potential living here as Life made
manifest as the realization of myself as All as One as Equal.<br />
<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize
and understand how I create JUSTIFICATION as a form of Defense and
Offense I administer regularly to aggressively hold myself within a
state of Suppression. I realize this shows to me how deceptive I am,
because within this I play dumb as a point of Inferiority, pretending
I do not know what I am really doing to myself and others as I use
and abuse my words specifically for a sort of reactionary play out of
the truth of myself acceptances and allowances.<br />
<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resist
slowing down within and as Vulnerability and Patience to investigate
the usage of my words to be sure that I am standing clear in and as
the meaning and the specificity of my share.<br />
<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be so
careless within and as JUSTIFICATION.<br />
<br />
<br />
I realize the shame within and as the way I have lived Justification.<br />
<br />
<br />
I realize the travesty of my living and understanding of how to
best express Justification.<br />
<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to Weaponize
Justification within myself where it's always been used from the
starting point of me existing here on the field of battle, playing
out my inner conflict and superimposing my suppression/depression
onto the world as how I manipulate myself and others into the point
of Inferiority.<br />
<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize
and understand the fear within and as my usage of Justification,
where it has been my accepted and allowed, Inferiority and Inadequacy
in me that has kept me Justifying....where I created this Need within
myself to Explain my Reactions as my actions, to Justify my
self-righteousness as someone who is ok, or even better than ok,
someone who is good and is even in fact admirable.<br />
<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to superimpose
deceit within my structuring of words.<br />
<br />
<br />
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize
and understand the origins of the trauma from my childhood as the
source memories of myself physically integrating/learning how to
Defend and Attack myself with Justification.<br />
<br /><br />
<br />
I commit myself to exposing the ridiculousness of Justification
used from the starting point of making sense and rationalizing the
explanations of failure without being asked and or questioned about
such things.<br />
<br /><br />
<br />
I commit myself to question myself and others in and as the usage
of Justification.<br />
<br />
<br />
I commit myself to show how Justification is an effective tool in
and as Manipulation.<br />
<br />
<br />
I commit myself to use Justification as a tool of self-support in
questioning my acceptances and allowances....and to from here be
Vulnerable and Intimate with myself in going deep into the discomfort
within and as my body...and from here, access the memories of my past
where i accepted and allowed suppression as a result of not realizing
nor investigating the specificity of my reactions.<br />
Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-87021808352431626272017-02-11T12:42:00.002-08:002017-02-11T12:51:52.057-08:00Day 794 - FaceOff "JUSTIFICATION"I've been facing the characters of myself as how I have conditioned myself to respond in a plethora of scenarios. What's interesting to see is myself as the array of characters and also to within various forms of interactions/engagements where sometimes i have a particular resistance towards a certain type of character and it's like i want to move on and away from that character as quickly as possible because I see something in them that I don't like.<br />
<br />
Lets look at this point of seeing something in another person that i don't like.<br />
<br />
The things i see in other people at times are ugly, undesirable, awkward, overcompensation, fake, fucked, bullshit, superiority, inferiority, volatile, scripted, Routine, justification and excuses.<br />
<br />
These are all points of myself that i am working through.<br />
<br />
for practical purposes here: I am going to take one word:<br />
<br />
JUSTIFICATION<br />
<br />
<br />
I've been getting so angry when reading and speaking with others and Justification comes up. Like this up sets me very much. The irony of this is it is showing a deeply embedded point within me.<br />
<br />
What I have noticed about myself within and as my day to day living as JUSTIFICATION, is that it has been a point of self-suppression, a form of accepted and allowed defense system that I use as a form of Offense and Attack on myself that is projected outward onto others to compensate with a form of suppression/depression existent within myself.<br />
<br />
Let me further clarify:<br />
<br />
Justification has been used by me as a sort of Self-narration to Explain myself to others my Point of View as in why I am Right within my Living as the decisions I am making and have made. Justification is the Excuses I create as the ways to validate Inferiority within myself as Accepting less than my Best Potential.<br />
<br />
I've been using Justification as a form of aggressive Offense where I would instantly go into an automated reactionary response where I experience the urgency to Explain myself and my actions to others. Fucked up in a lot of ways, because what this reveals upon further investigation is how I am manipulating myself in participation through others. Meaning, I use my participations with others to validate my behavior and pattern where i superimpose a sort of Validating and Accepting response/reaction in others the way i position my sharing of information as JUSTIFICATION.<br />
<br />
SEE:<br />
<br />
Justification has been my way to say, " Just If I see a Tie On". Meaning also: Just if I/Me/You can see the connection I am making here and accept it as the terms of the Contract I am presenting here as my word scheme as my Pyramid layered self-deception.<br />
<br />
Vulnerability has been a support word for me in going deeper into investigating JUSTIFICATION within myself.<br />
<br />
Vulnerability is cool because I within and as Vulnerability I am strong in standing in and as Weakness. I move past my dissonance and stand as the point of accounting for my acceptances and allowances that are not cool.<br />
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The experiences I encounter within and as my vulnerability are very challenging at times as there is often a certain amount of intensity that comes up and that has manifested in a myriad of ways in my body in various moments...and so I've made a sort of game and challenge for myself in being my own DETECTIVE in making a play and work of Identifying the Specifics of the experience that surfaces and comes up within myself. What is very fascinating about this detective process of self-investigation for me is that my behavior and patterns are Learned over time, Layered within and as Specific Memories of past acceptances and allowances. So much fun and excitement in a way of creating the path of self-discovery with going into the seemingly Unknown of myself. Unknown from the point of not realizing and understanding how exactly i self-sabotaged, self-suppressed myself in the first place!<br />
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This process of self-exploration as taking on the staring point responsibility here as an Existential Detective has been a journey and an adventure for each and everyone. My ability to relate and share and teach and learn has improved immensely. The quality of my life is a continued improvement because I Keep letting go of baggage that is unnecessary to hold onto as impressions of suppression as the points and moments in memory as Not Understanding and Realizing myself here as Life, One and Equal.<br />
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I enjoy learning so much.<br />
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I encourage each and everyone to dare to go deep within and as your participation's with others and the activities you participate within alone...and really see what you think about others and the activities you participate within ,,,and really get to know your weaknesses, you know, The Justifications.....the Just if I see a Tie On.<br />
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Remember:<br />
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Justification in and of itself can be a cool tool to see where we work to create explanation in our actions...and actually understanding the nature of justification as why we are wanting to manipulate our information in a particular way.<br />
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Do we see how Manipulation is Complimentary in action to Justification?Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2595016903021085408.post-32957456290931740772016-12-20T22:16:00.000-08:002016-12-20T22:16:28.043-08:00Day 793 - Mind Superior Royalty<br /><div align="CENTER" style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
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“<i><b>I
forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to lock myself up
within my word relationships in such a sneaky and deceptive manner of
self-trickery that I resist to even speak or write about
it....because the pain of self-condemnation as an Inferior and an
Imbecile is heart breakingly embarrassing to myself as Mind Superior
Royalty who is Superior to such characterizations and behaviours.”</b></i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize
nor understand the significance of my words and world.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resist
taking authority for my world and words.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to abdicate
direction to misalignment within and as my word and world
relationships.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to dismiss the
extent of my errors and suppression within and as my relationships.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize
nor really extensively investigate myself within and as my words as
the science and structured signs of myself here as how I have
specifically created myself to be exactly as I am in this moment
here.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize
nor understand how I created my world through and as the specific
impressions i created within and as the words within myself and how
it is my words that are in fact very questionable always as my words
are the explanation to why my world is exactly the way it is. I
realize my words are not valid as an excuse of justification for why
and how I am here within and as the world. I realize who and how I
have existed within and as the world as been an excuse and
justification, in a way, my ignorance and incompetence, a lack of
Life regard.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for seeking
stimulation externally to charge myself internally as how I have
conditioned my preferences within my mind for feeding off of my
physical body from day to day.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to trust within
my thinking as how to best feed off my body for energetic highs and
lows as to give me the perfect chemical concoction i desire in the
moment to satisfy a seemingly internal and external craving for more
and more consumption.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize
and understand the addiction i have created within and as my mind to
feed off myself, my life, all life as an energetic kick back.
Conflict.</i></div>
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<i>Tension for the attention.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to crave the
continuous pulsation of tension within my body to feel something,
because without a constant stressing and straining in way of
engagement i have an experience of being unfulfilled.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for desiring to
get my fill of consumption, a point of tension in creating rifts,
conflict, as various forms of self-abuse.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize
how extensively integrated my conditioned behavior and personality is
for destructive self-abuse...and therefore world abuse.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting
to get real, make the daily commitment to deconstruct my
constructions of word/world relationships that i exist in and as
separation to.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fuck around
with actually living words for real and creating myself and world as
I would like.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to make believe
that really investigating myself within and as Words is something
that is not totally necessary....is entertaining and enjoyable but at
the same time a lot of effort and work and therefor avoidable and
personally i rather go about this process of word/world entanglement
in a less than organized and structured manner because the task and
process is overwhelming to me.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become
overwhelmed with the process of word and world entanglement.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think that i
must think of everything before i can really do anything.\</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for holding
myself back from playing and working on Potential developments.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize
and understand how One in fact goes about Creating.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resist being
totally self-honest with myself here and that I haven't understood
Creation.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear looking
inferior to others in my understanding, knowledge and application of
myself.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to penalize
myself within and as a result of conditioning myself to be controlled
through fear of not Knowing.</i></div>
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<i>I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize
the process of Know thy Self, is to in fact stand in the face of Not
Knowing, and to from here, Walk, take the steps to: Investigating,
Learning, Asking Questions, play and work with things so that I know.</i></div>
Mike Destonian McDonaldhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10616782433941218749noreply@blogger.com0