Within doing some reading for school I've found myself having some reactions/judgments about the particular scholars works I am studying and within this I see how in many instances I take a position of self righteous superiority and create opinions within my mind where I am thinking along the lines like this person just doesn't get the whole picture...like I see the limitation in their perspective here...or I see that there just creating a work of like a total mind fuck...as like making arguments and assumptions back and forth as like total semantics...and within all this...I have allowed myself to be mildly bothered by the texts that I am reading...and within this finding it difficult to move through the material swiftly.
I see how holding onto judgments and opinions about particular scholars works that I am required to work with, so that I can complete all school course requirements...is in no way helping me and is in fact been a hindrance to my movement within this particular course.
I am thus taking the opportunity here to write a release and re-programming with regards to working with scholarly course material...as I see and realise a change in my starting point is necessary because I realise my behavior within and as forms of self righteous superiority is totally unacceptable.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for existing as a self righteous superiority character within doing readings for school...and within doing some making and forming judgments and oppinions about the scholars work I am reading...and within this making judgments/opinions about the individual as like what I think of them.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising the exposure of points of myself here within making judgments/opinions within and as self righteous superiority about the scholars works that I am reading and that the fact that I think that they are this and they are that is because I know what this and that is because this and that is what I am accepting and allowing myself to exist as.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for going into a form of helplessness within doing my school studies by getting frustrated with the material that I am required to work with...and for not realising and understanding that the projections that I am pushing outward onto the scholars is in fact points that I need to face within myself and that the scholars are in fact acting as like teachers and examples for me...mirroring to me where I am existing within points of instability, as a result of having energetic reactions within me as thoughts/feelings/emotions/judgments about the other that I am deflecting accountability for within myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understanding the absurd ridiculousness of making opinions and judgments about others within/while I am doing my school readings...because making judgments and opinions about another while reading, just takes away my complete focus from moving through the material as quickly and swiftly as possible without any issues and difficulties. I realise and understand that I have caused and created difficulties for myself within doing school readings as a result of not staying disciplined within not accepting and allowing myself to project opinions and judgments...and when and as I see myself projecting an opinion and or judgement, I stop and breathe and I reflect the point of opinion and judgement upon myself and I find the memory as the point of cross reference for the particular opinion and or judgement and I do I forgiveness on the memory relations where I created the initial acceptance and allowance of such judgments and or opinions. I realise this is a step by step process and some points are bigger than others...and that it is more practical and supportive for me to in some instances make a note of the initial memories in relation to the judgement/opinion and write them out. Also, I realise and understand the point of forgiving myself for separating myself from the point in which I created the judgement/opinion about.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for separating myself from the scholars and the scholarly works I am required to work with within my course studies. I realise and understand the absurd ridiculousness of separating myself form the material and the creators of the material...as I realise and understand that creating friction within the work I am doing...just retards/prolongs progress/process within and as the work I am doing and is therefore counter productive to my effectiveness within making progress and process the material effectively and efficiently.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having been addicted to making the process and progress of moving through school work extremely difficult and mentally exhausting.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understanding that it has been my relationship starting point within the doing the school work that has made moving through the school work extremely difficult.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for kicking my own mentally as like inducing myself within forms of mental masturbation as judgments and opinions. I realise and understand that I am not interested in continuing such behaviours and I realise how participating within such behaviours is a waste of my time and it is not what I am interested in doing...and there is no practical and supportive benefit to Life in doing so...as in fact this is a form of abuse that I see and realise I should in no way tolerate...because I realise and understand that it myself responsibility for preventing abuse within myself...and therefore, when and as I see myself beginning to formulate opinions and judgments about others within and while doing school work, I stop and breathe and I realise stopping and breathing is the first act of preventing the continuation of abuse. I realise and understand the more I use the preventative measure as stopping and breathing when and as an opinion/judgement comes up within me as a form of reaction...the easier it is to do this.
I commit myself to stopping and breathing within moments of reaction as judgement and opinion about others.
I commit myself to using the stop and breathe technique as preventative measure to insure I do not continue to create time loops of perpetuation of thoughts/feelings/emotions within my mind.
I commit myself to taking responsibility for the thoughts/feelings/emotions that exist within my mind.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for existing as a self righteous scholar.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understanding that every point with regards to scholars that bothers me is a point of self reflection and investigation...as I realise and understand that I am able to actually improve and expand myself within taking accountability for myself and making the necessary corrections where I see and realise problems to be existing within me.
I commit myself to investigating myself as a self righteous scholar as I move through my school work and within this...I commit myself changing myself from a self righteous scholar to a scholar of integrity and dignity as a scholar who stands within and as the principle of Oneness and Equality as Being who moves beyond superiority and inferiority complexes.
I commit myself to moving beyond inferiority and superiority complexes
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