Day 549 Facing the Drama Here

In my previous blog I said, "I don't really have much drama in my life if any." I reflected upon these words here and I see this as a result of me having been isolated within my own mind where I have been disconnected from the total physical reality here. Because the total reality of Life here is full of drama as like so much injustices/trauma/abuse existing here. Within this I see how it is my self-responsibility to face the music/drama here as all the injustices/abuse/trauma existing here. Like what is this Life I have here for if I do not stand up to do everything within my capabilities to stop abuse from existing here within our shared physical reality. I mean look at the way our economic system operates...like how human functioning is based in and around a peculiar relationship rules we've formed around money. Like life is totally disregarded in the name of money. I see how money can be a great tool to facilitate the movement/expression of Life. I realize and understand there needs to be a serious attitude adjustment...where we as humanity get our priorities aligned as what is best for all Life here. Because at the moment we've been actively or passively choosing to take the piss out of Life...as like just real total travesty...as like we've created a real muck of a gong-show scenario that has become quite the global epidemic of rapid destruction of Life/Earth here...as a result of being totally out of line in giving a shit for what is best here within and as our self-responsibility to care for one another and have a sustainable shared reality where we all reap the benefits of the common good.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for distancing myself from and as universal responsibility as seeing and realizing and understanding my relationship/agreement with all Life here as what is best for all Life here within and as the starting point principle of oneness and equality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for becoming sheltered within my personal bubble of things are all good where I can have an easy like vacation style lifestyle because I was a fortunate winner in the birth lottery where I was born into a family of money/elitism...where basically I am benefiting from the atrocious abusive economic system where few benefit and many suffer.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having been hesitant and resistant to really push myself full force and dedicate my life living here to working on projects that would be for the benefit of future generations of Life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to get stuck within the all good attitude of focusing on my personal reality while disregarding and distracting myself from the greater outer reality as like the big picture within and as the consideration of Life interconnectedness within and as oneness and equality here where all Life is of and as the highest value.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for distracting and confusing myself from the big picture of what is going on within our global reality by choosing to allow myself to get caught up within moments of petty bullshit as like having reactions to others within my personal reality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the shame within deeming myself not worthy of taking on a large role within and as the standing here as a being who speaks up for what is best for all Life and directs and facilitates practical living solutions for the betterment of all Life here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the shame within getting caught up within petty bullshit within my mind in relationship to events/beings within my immediate environment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for accepting and allowing myself for daydreaming about possible courses of action for myself without actually physically moving myself within and as practical living self-movement that is best for all Life here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for thinking that it is enough for me to be at peace/ease within the personal/interpersonal relationships within my reality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being selfish within not giving enough attention to directing/creating solutions for big picture world problems that exist within our reality. I realize and u understand that obviously in order for myself to be in a position of creating/directing big picture solutions for our shared reality that I have to stand effectively within all the small points/relationships as the personal and interpersonal relationship.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having justified not pushing myself to investigate all the atrocities that exist within our shared reality because I do not experience a desired positive energetic stimulationfrom doing so.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having been conditioned to only give my attention to that which I believe will give me a positive energetic experience. I realize and understand the design flaw within only focusing on the positive energetic experience...as this is the current predicament of humanity as like we are fueling the chaos/drama/abuse/disease within not realizing how we disregarding our equality and oneness within and as everything here.

To be Continued

Day 548 Relationship Drama

I've been reflecting upon the point of relationship drama. I don't really have much if any drama in my life these days. I've come to realize and understand the practical living solution for resolving any issues of drama that come up within myself as the tool and application of self-forgiveness. I am committed to living self-forgiveness as who and how and why I am here. Self-forgiveness is perhaps the greatest gift I have been bestowed within and as. I've had extensive situations of drama within myself within past relationship particpations. What I've come to realize and understand about such particpations as acceptances and allowances is none of it was in fact real. Drama is fiction.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having created extensive amounts of drama within myself...and I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding that I was creating make belief within myself as like a juxtaposition posed prose of absurd ridiculousness as like super imposing an illusionary perspective reality upon myself within and as the veils of mind consciousness energetic distortion as a plethora of feelings and emotions.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having not realized and understood how I created and formed my mind consciousness system as like a perpetuating ongoing drama based upon and within and as myreactions to external reality. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I was born into this world within an induced stupor where I would regard everything to be separate from myself as like being blinded from the actuality of my images and likeness within and as complete total self-reflection.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how addicted I became to inducing myself within a stupor as like make believing and perpetuating the delusion of drama/conflict/friction/separation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the shame within choosing to create a make belief reality where I am in a perpetuating state of delusion as like the self-manipulated induced stupor of perpetuating my own self-hypnosis of fiction/drama.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the profound simplicity in utilizing the tool of self-forgiveness as the practical means necessary to self-correcting and self-gifting/giving myself clarity within and as the self-realization of myself here within and as everything.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I conditioned myself to separate myself here from everything. I realize and understand the process journey to Life as like bringing myself all together here as life as like piecing myself back together. I commit myself to moving through the self-imposed restraints and conditions I bestowed upon myself as the words I accepted and allowed myself to speak and think as the ink that stained me within and as the consequences of physical traumatic abuse.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the shame within victimizing myself and all Life within and as the accepted and allowed perpetuated stupor I induced and encouraged as energetic reactions to external reality. I realize and understand how the design of humanity has been a shame as like being born into bondage as like energy resource consuming ridiculous absurdity. I realize and understand my decision to purify the law of my being here as Equality and Oneness.

I realize and understand that to continue to play out the time looping of my mind as a perpetual motion energy charging and enhancing physical Life consuming abuse/abuser is ridiculously absurd and bizarre. I commit myself to restoring self-dignity and self-integrity as a result of the labored digging up the buried design flaws within myself, and integrating physical structured Life support as what is always best for Life as the realization and understanding of Oneness and Equality.

I commit myself to sort through every point of drama/fiction/friction/conflict that comes up within my mind as I realize and understand this is the practical living way for me to insure the prevention of continuous cycles of abuse within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the shame within perpetuating and inducing and glorifying continuous cycles of abuse within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having thought before that I can just understand something within my mind and than that's it the correction has been made and I am changed. I realize and understand the extensive self-discipline and meticulous specificity required in laboring practical living change as the remediation of and as self-corrections for each and every accepted and allowed inaction within myself. I commit myself to the remediation process as I see and realize this is how the self-purification process works as a gifting/giving myself the opportunity to stand here as Life manifested/birthed in and as physical living reality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having played so many deceptive games with myself as like running confusion and distortion programs within my mind as like operating within layers and layers of built up energy accumulation and like the cycling spirals built up and layered upon each other as like my self-created labyrinth.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating and perpetuating drama/fiction/conflict/friction/shame/despair/cowardice within myself as a result of denying the extent of what it means to stand within and as the humbleness of taking self-responsibility for physical reality as a being that is determined to clean up the mess as the false messages that I participated within and contributed to and passively accepted and actively encouraged and distracted myself from taking ownership for the extent of the evil heinous atrocities that exist here within and as our shared reality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how self-responsibility is one thing that cannot stand the testaments of time within and as stimulation. I realize and understand how self-responsibility can be temporarily stimulated within oneself as like a bridge/crutch of support and assistance well one garners the self-direction and stamina to stand without the energetic impulsiveness of fear as like the roots of energetic manipulation that induce that extent of human harm and disregard for one another. I realize and understand committing to what is best for all Life is beyond any form of stimulation as it requires real physical labored movement/action that cannot be faked. I realize and understand how nothing would is required to be done within and as make belief reality as like to remain within a self-induced stupor of energetic reaction as the physical depleting life resource. I commit myself to preventing self-destruction. I commit myself to Life construction as the best self-construction as the self-realization and understanding of the process of self-forgiveness and self-correction as the required standing within understanding of Oneness and Equality being the starting point of Creation.

I commit myself to stand within and as all of existence here as the commitment to and as the manifestation of Heaven on Earth as that which is best for all Life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for suppressing the sadness that exists within and as a result of reflecting upon my images and likeness as the internal and external horror stories of and as our reality here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for making believe that the horror that exists within physical reality is not really real because of the belief that life is all about the here after. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating a mystery and therefore being lost from life as a result of not realizing and understanding myself as the missed tree of life...as the consequence of not accounting for the Equality and Oneness of Life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understand myself as the missed tree of life as the perpetuating mystery searching for meaning within knowledge and information that I could just believe as myself proclaimed justification framed reality.

To Be Continued

Day 547 Life Drama

Continuing from my previous post, "Drama as a Guilty Pleasure"

I've been reflecting upon my Life as a Drama originating in conflict. I see there are many dimensions to this.

The main problem I see is that I've abused myself and contributed to the perpetuated abuse on planet earth as a result of myself exist within conflict/drama within my mind. I realize I have perpetuated such actions by continuing within these cycles as like getting fixated within a point of drama/conflict and within doing so creating layers/depth to the conflict/drama. I see and realize the absurd ridiculousness of such behaviour. I see how I have been often trying to avoid drama by like trying to escape drama/conflict by focusing on the positive/entertainment. Like my own personal happiness. Like consuming myself within the pleasure of positive energyexperience. I see how this is like an endless exhausting search that does not result in self-satisfaction but in fact actually grows/stimulates the conflicting drama within myself that is also reflecting externally as the shared reality in which I am an integral part of. 

Solution: Standing in and as the face of drama/conflict and realizing and understanding myself as the director of drama/conflict...in that I create solutions for all issues/problems/conflicts that exist within and without of myself as the self-realization that all that is here is a reflection of me and that as I direct me I am able to assist and support others to direct themselves...and together we can stand within and as self-direction in taking self-responsibility for the external problems of our shared reality that are a result of all of our internal acceptances and allowance. 

I realize and understand as I continue to sort out my external reality I am able to increasingly take on a greater role in standing in a position of great responsibility in providing solutions that are best for all Life here within and as our Planet Earth.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for neglecting the totality of planet earth as a result of neglecting the totality of myself here. I realize and understand myself responsibility to planet earth as care taking for myself/home/here.

I commit myself to caring for Myself/Earth/Life/Everyone/Everything.

I realize the practicality in systematically moving through point by point within myself. I realize and understand there are many intricacies to my mind programming conditioning. I realize and understanding that ignoring any point by allowing it to fester when the opportunity exists to take direct action is not in fact a viable solution.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for perpetuating myself to exist within a guilty conscience as like not pushing myself to work as diligently as I am capable to sort out every issue that exists within myself as a point of conflict. I realize and understand the practicality of digging to the depth of the core of my being in creating solutions for issues that exist within myself. I realize and understand the point of practical living consistent constant movement as I commitment to bringing forth conflict resolutions. I realize and understand the shame in delaying conflict resolution when I in fact see a point that requires direction and I don't respond immediately within and as the self-realization of what it in fact means to live here one and equal as self-responsibility and accountability. I realize and understand that I stand here within and integral role for the future development of Earth. And that my participation reflection the future of Earth. I realize and understand that there is no time to delay self-responsibility and accountability. I realize and understanding that delaying to face any point of self-responsibility is in fact an abdication and a travesty to Life as what is best for all Life Here. I commit myself to practically live conflict resolution. I commit myself to not fester within inaction in conflict within my mind. I commit myself to readily moving within and as the expression of self-responsibility. I commit myself to practically living the dedication to assisting and supporting what is best for all Life as the manifestation of Heaven on Earth. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for self-sabotaging myself within deflecting self-responsibility for conflicting drama that exists within my mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for deriving pleasure for deliberately instigating the play out of drama for my own personal amusement.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be distracted within my mind as like allowing myself to get lost within and as like a self-disillusioned temporary escape into la la land of my mind of imagination from the perspective of placing myself in and as a realm of disassociation with equality and oneness as all Life here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having become addicted to fueling drama within my mind as a result of participating within reactions in my external environment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the shame within allowing a point of reaction within my mind to fester for even a few minutes.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for compromising what is best for all Life within abusing myself by self-righteously festering within a relatively minor reactions within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for justifying and excusing relatively small reactions within my mind...as like thinking that these things are not really that big a deal...like I am not causing extensive harm to anyone by forming these opinions/thoughts/feelings/emotions in relationship to others. I realize and understand the absurd ridiculousness of accepting and allowing myself to regard myself as like so small within justifying and excusing a point of reaction by believing it to be no big deal and just kind of like a small point of insignificance. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to rant and rave about the drama's of our shared reality without really thoroughly investigating the extent of each problem and presenting tangible practical living solutions. I realize and understand the uselessness of ranting and raving about problems without in fact directing practical solutions. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for deriving pleasure within ranting and raving about fuckedness as like an energetic release as like squirting out some ecstasy from the real nasty...and within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the shame within myself for existing as like the real nasty in deriving pleasure within ranting and raving as a point of and as some sort of orgasmic energetic release without bringing forth any practical direction and solution as a gifting presentation of assistance and support.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting to see the simplicity in problem solving with constant and consistent continuous movement in practically living solutions which are best for Life.

I realize and understand the absurd ridiculousness of choosing to enable resistance to seeing the simplicity in problem solving with constant and consistent continuous movement in practical living solutions which are best for Life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the shameful consequences within delaying a practical living solution for even 1 second. I realize and understand that this is in fact unacceptable abuse and is not to be tolerated. I commit myself to perfecting myself within and as my standing as the understanding assistance and support of what it in fact means to practically live and express myself here as the solution to what is best for all Life. I commit myself to the process journey to life as what is best for all Life. I commit myself to self being here all ways as what is best for Life Here.

I commit myself to developing and expanding my specificity in problem solving by creating viable solutions that can stand the testaments of time as a reflection and living presentation of what is in fact best for Life. 

I commit myself to creation as that which is best for all Life.

I commit myself to stopping abuse.

I commit myself to becoming more specific in identifying problems and solutions as a way to more specifically provide practical physical living structured support.

I commit myself to specific specialized structured support for all Life.

I commit myself to simplifying the complexity of my process journey to life by realizing and understanding how by looking at the small details and accounting of each small detail, point by point,...I am in fact able to be all accounted for. I realize and understand this to be true because I have tested and proven to myself the effectiveness and practicality in detailing the specificity within simplifying the complexity of my process journey to life by making each step to be taken not like a drastic jump that is intangible...but a consistent and constant movement as a continuous movement that enables myself to develop a flow that continue to go as the movement of myself as sound here that becomes clear in removing the fear that has prevented and limited myself from being here.

To be continued as I take the time to continue to develop my specificity in practically living as the standing embodiment of solutions as what is best for all Life Here.

I see how by going into and sharing and resolving specific dramatic events within my life I can stand as a sharing bridge of support and assistance as the continuation and building of the path/journey/walk to the truth of myself here.

I commit myself to sharing my journey to Life!

Day 546 Drama as a Guilty Pleasure

I was looking at the point of "Drama" this evening. I was looking at the definition of the word "Drama". I just started playing with the word Drama as I write here...Draw ma,,,Dr. am a. Stories...like a play out of events...shit happens unexpectedly...or what would appear unexpectedly...sequence of events...climatic and anti climatic...rising action and falling action...fictional tale...history and herstory.

I was looking as the point of Drama as a point of conflict.

I was also looking at Drama as a point of stimulation.

I was also looking at our shared reality as a seriously intense Drama.

I'm looking at the point of how I say Drama is a guilty pleasure. Why would this be the case? Well if we consider our reality as a seriously intense drama....and drama as a guilty pleasure....it can be deduced that our participation and acceptances and allowances here are perpetuated in this seriously intense Drama because we derive pleasure from abuse. This is obviously the point of a "guilty pleasure"

Why the fuck would I want to derive pleasure from abuse?

I was looking at the point of how the tv series and movies I often look to watch are drama's...like with lots of story line and character development. 

I see how I have made drama a guilty pleasure.

I will be continuing to investigate Drama in blogs to come

Stay tuned

Day 545 Stupid Conditioning Corrections

Continuing from Previous Blogs Stupid Conditioning Part 1 and Part 2


I commit myself to living passion and compassion.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become stressed within situations where things do not work out according to my plan and or expectations.

I commit myself to adapting my plans from the starting point of practicality when and as my plans do not manifest as expected.

I commit myself to flexibility within achieving my goals and exercising my action plans.

When and as I see myself becoming frustrated/agitated...even a little bit, I stop and breathe, I realize and understand the impracticality of allowing myself to dwell and wallow within despair.

I commit myself to stop dwelling and wallowing within despair.

I realize and understand the absurd ridiculousness of dwelling and and wallowing within despair.

When and as I see myself reacting to someone's learning ability, I stop and breathe, I realize and understand the absurd ridiculousness of reacting to someone's learning ability. I realize and understand reacting to someone's learning ability is like choosing to suppress self-awareness and my natural learning ability.

I commit myself to supporting the natural learning ability.

I commit myself to encouraging the natural learning ability.

I commit myself to patience and self-trust within and as the natural learning ability.

I realize and understand that within the natural learning ability everyone eventually gets to the same point of understanding/realization.

When and as I see myself neglecting a duty of care for myself/others, I stop and breathe, I realize and understand the self-integrity and self-responsibility within and as the 'duty of care' as what is best for all Life as the epitome of Oneness and Equality. I realize and understand the absurd ridiculousness of negating self-responsibility within and as my duty of care. I realize and understand myself as the epitome of and as duty of care. I realize and understand my standing commitment here as principled living duty of care. I see and realize our duty of care within and as self-honest investigation as the best self-responsible solutions. I realize and understand self-responsible solutions prevent the perpetuation of most unfortunate consequence. I commit myself to prevention as the best cure. I commit myself to moving myself expression here within and as the starting point of 'duty of care'

When and as I see I am accepting and allowing difficult in living patience as a word of assistance and support within myself, I stop and breathe, I realize and understand that I am accepting and allowing a discrepancy to exist within myself in relationship to the word "patience". I direct myself to clarify my relationship agreement within and as "patience" as like the payment/gift in enabling myself to see with clarity the common sense obviousness of what is best...as I realize and understand what is best for Life come from within and as the self-honesty of patience, as like taking the time to see for real so that I in fact can realize what is here to see and can direct my actions from and as the starting point solution of what is best for Life, as I realize and understand that I first gift myself the gift of patience and in that first gifting myself the gift of patience/self-real-seeing...I enable myself to give real support because I have taken the time to make sure I have what is best to give and share as the supported living solution here. I realize and understand myself as the living assisted and supported solution. I realize and understand I have the patience to receive the gift of Life as I am committed to laboring myself here, in and as physical reality. I commit myself to the patience in birthing myself as Life.

When and as I see myself reflecting on baggage that I have harbored within myself such as disappointment/regret, I take this moment and opportunity to release myself from my own self inflicted bondage into suffering and internal damnation, I realize and understand when I am triggered by an external event within my reality that opens up a point of self-reflection in seeing my past history...I direct myself in giving myself a new way forward, by circumventing the continuation of a past historical pattern that does not best serve all Life here. I realize and understand my ability to create a new path for myself as all Life here that is a presentation of what is best for all Life. I realize and understand the point of practical living individual self-expression within the birthing process of Life born from and as the physical. I realize that it is the principles that are important within creating a new path as a solution/remedy to circumvent old history from continuing to repeat itself.

I commit myself to releasing/letting go of all the dead weight I have dragged around within myself.

I commit myself to stop burdening myself with the extra weight of unresolved conflict within myself.

I commit myself stress free living as the self-realization and commitment to facing and releasing all problems that exist within myself.

I commit myself to becoming problem free as a self sustaining solution that constantly and consistently works to maintain excellence/perfection/magnificence.

I commit myself to embracing excellence/perfection/magnificence.

I commit myself to realizing and understanding the humbleness within and as the excellence/perfection/magnificence of self.

I commit myself to solutions that are best for all Life.

I commit myself to stop choosing to be spiteful.

I commit myself to standing as example of the decision to let go of the freedom to be spiteful.

I commit myself to deprogramming stupidity from within myself.

I commit myself to programming that which is best for all Life.

I commit myself to Oneness and Equality as the initial starting point program from which All Life programs can be born and scripted as the written scripture which is all ways best for Life.

I realize and understand the process of re-structuring the law of my being within and as the rudiments of Life Being Oneness and Equality.

When and as I see myself blaming a student, I stop and face my mistake as a teacher as I realize and understand the shame in blaming a student for their learning inability. I realize and understand the self-responsibility in and as the physical standing as a world teacher to be held in and as accordance to the principle of Life Being Equality and Oneness. I realize and understand blame is lame...and that within blame there is a point of opportunity to correct a misfortune and therefor in turn, turning the missed fortune into and as a fortune as the practical physical living example and solution of the impossible becoming possible through and as the self-determination of my will being the way which is the growth and expansion of that which is always best for all Life here as the consistent and constant sharing/givings/offerings that are all ways best for Life.

I commit myself to standing within and without Life and Death.

I commit myself to preventing stupidity.

I commit myself to standing as the best education possible.

I commit myself to dedicating myself to education as that which is best for all Life.

I commit myself to Life Education.

I commit myself to preventing misfortune within education.

I commit myself to giving the best education.

When and as I see myself suppressing the giving of the best education possible, I realize and understand the point of oneness and equality here as the principle Life living law of existence and within this I see and realize how I was choosing to not receive the best education possible..and within this moment of clarity...I give myself the answer as the lesson learned from my mistake and therefore take myself direction inward and outward as the onward playing presentation of and as the practical living Life Simplicity Physical Solution Here.

I commit myself to playing and presenting the Practical Living Life Simplicity Physical Solution Here.

I commit myself to standing as a Teacher/Instructor/Educator/Teammate/Peer/Common Man, playing and presenting the Life Simplicity within and as the Practical Living Physical Solution Here.

I commit myself to move beyond good intentions and desires that perpetuate self-interest indulgences that are out of alignment of what is best for All Life Here.

I commit myself to aligning myself Here as what is all ways best for/as Life Here.

I commit myself to stop sabotaging creation within and as the pursuit of happiness/good intentions.

I commit myself to self-responsibility within and as direct-response-abled-first-aid....as the care and attention I wish to receive. I realize and understand the practical within the statement, "be careful what You wish for"