Day 387 Facing the Brutal Truth

Day 387 Facing the Brutal Truth

Writing today was initiated within reflecting on point of observing others drinking alcohol as like a raw energy drink to entice/stimulate positive energetic experiences…and realising and understanding how I reacted to hearing people speaking within a positive energetically charged tonality …as like I realise and understand how I participated within past moments as like spewing verbal diarrhea because it felt good because speaking in such a manner was fueling and perpetuating positive energetic experience within myself which is result of lots of negative energy charged acceptances and allowances within myself.

Also I reflected on the point of how negligent and abusive it is to spew words with a positive energetic charge as like having no regard or consideration of the consequences of imprinting polarized sounds onto other beings within your environment and specifically within oneself as like the spewing of words from ones mouth from the starting point of polarity friction is perpetually compounding the accepted and allowed abuse within this world because our inner acceptances and allowances is a self-reflection of what is accepted and allowed within our environments as our inner reality reflects our outter reality…and within this I realise and understand that it is myself responsibility to tak accountability as care for myself within my environment and to be the directive principle in preventing abuse and remedying situations of abuse and also to take a stand and voice myself as Living the words that, “abuse is not acceptable…I do not stand for abuse…I stand for Life being free from Abuse…as Like Life is for Living Awesomeness as the awe so me nest of that which is all ways best as like the total picture clarity as seeing clearly.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having focused on selective aspects of positivity as a defense mechanism way to stop myself from seeing the brutal truth which is the negative.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understanding the necessity in facing everything that is negative and bad as like the only way to see that which is good and best.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understanding that having access to which is best is not possible without understanding and removing/releasing that which is bad from within myself as acceptances and allowances.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having resisted dealing with all that is negative within myself…and within this I forgive myself for not realising and understanding how I cycle through energetic experiences of positivity as like being secreted very temporary escapes from all the negative that is brewing within myself as acceptances and allowances that have not yet been self-corrected.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having resisted the assistance and support of others as a mirror reflection as like a point of cross reference in assessing judgement defense justified reasoning within myself as like ingrained negative acceptances and allowances.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting to see all the nastiest that exist within others as like a way of avoiding the point of self-honest reflection as like bring the point back to myself and working within and as the process of self-correction which is facilitated in as the process of self-forgiveness/self-realisation…as like the ultimate gift giving of a physical act of love.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for choosing to be selective in what I see as like manipulating myself in deriving a positive experience….and within this not realising and understanding how the positive experience is derived from accepting and allowing so much negative nastiness within myself as like various form of self-suppressions which are consequence of all my thought/feeling/emotion acceptances and allowances…and I realise and understand that choosing to just be positive as like taking the attitude stance/mantra of just focusing on the positive is one of the most self-deceptive ways of existing as like totaling numbing oneself from the brutal truth of reality as which I am a part and shareholder in creating from within and as the law of Oneness and Equality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting to talk about the brutal truth of reality out of fear of causing myself created positive bubble illusion/delusion perspective/perception to shatter and my course of direction to change as like letting go of the chase/choosing to manipulate and distort Life time opportunity to be Here as the image and likeness of Heaven. I realise and understand that letting of bubble world delusion of positivity is in fact the only way to gain access to practical living within this world as Life and that resisting this process is like choosing to be less than Life as like accepting and allowing myself to not be worthy of greatness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for choosing to be less than Life by chasing after temporary moment of bliss positive energetic experiences as like not realising and understanding how I have always perpetuated my own fuckedness within being scared/fearful to live for real.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understand how I was conditioned to be scared and fearful of living for real as like enabling myself to be worthy of greatness…and within this I realise and understand the absurd ridiculousness of trying to fit in with everyone else that is scared and fearful to live for real and how in fact I am doing a disservice to my fellow inhabitants of Earth by resisting to face and transcend the irrational fear of living for real by always facing the brutal truth of my acceptances and allowances.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for doing a disservice to myself as all Life within postponing change that I see and realise as a necessary course of action as self-forgiveness. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for procrastinating on self-corrective actions within and as fearing change…as like change representing the unknown as like the end of the world as I know it.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing the unknown as like the brutal truth of myself…and within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having suppressed the brutal truth of myself to such an extent that the brutal truth of who I am is unknown and buried within and as acceptances and allowances that are less than what is always best for Life.

When and as I see myself resisting to talk about the brutal truth out of fear of being different and people taking offense to my sharing of words, I stop and breathe and I realise and understand the support within practical living words as like making the  best history within and as realising and understanding the point of self-responsibility as myself as the author of the story here as like always being the main character within the play.