Day 163 Greed Character Part 9

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing to let go of my girlfriend.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting to move away from her because than she might begin relations with someone else and I could lose the relations I have with her now.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for separating my girlfriend from myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for judging my girlfriend as superior to other women and that if I were to let go of my girlfriend because we were living in different parts of the world...I fear that I wouldnt be able to be with a girl as attractive as my girlfriend now.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for judging my girlfriends attractiveness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for judging my girlfriend against other women and placing my girlfriend on a pedastole...and I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating polarity relations with my girlfriend where sometimes I see her as inferior and other times I see her as superior.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for accepting and allowing myself for at flip flopping between inferiority and superiority within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating a greedy relationship with my girlfriend which I have allowed myself to become obsessed about as like me being addicted to having sex with her and fearing to let go of regular sex.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing not having regular sex.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for havomg valued my girlfriend as a possession that I own and that I don't really want to share or lose.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising how my relationship with my girlfriend now reflects my previous relationships and my accepted and allowed greed within each previous relationship I've had.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for justifying and validating greedy relationship with girlfriend of addiction to greed as like protecting my investment property as like greedy self righteousness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having desired to leave my girlfriend and also feared leaving my girlfriend.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fucking with myself as consequence of accepting and allowing myself to exist as a greed character...where I have created situations where In fucked if I do and Im fucked if I don't as like fear existing withi both directions...as like fear of loss and desire.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising how greed creates like stagnation as like still water as like a blockade/resistance to the flow of me as water as like self imposed limitation within and as self direction/self movement as consequence of accepting and allowing fear


I forgive for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understanding that relationship with greed creates a damned if I do and damned if I don't scenario as consequence of accepting and allowing particpation within and as fear as like fear of loss and desire.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating scenarios within myself as as desire and fear of loss...as like wanting to move one way and not wanting to move the other way and going the way I don't want because of the fear....or having fear in both directions and allowing myself to be trapped and stuck within petrification of fearing to really push myself to move with definitive certainty in either direction because of the manifested resistance that has been created through my particpations within fear within my relationships as consequence of assigning a polarity scectrum of values to the real of all my realtionships as either being some sort of like or dislike with an energetic charge attached as either feeling or emotion.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being so possessed within my greed that I did not realise or understand how exstensively I have been fucking myself within thinking as like realms of judgement based in and as my accepted and allowed relationship connections which are rooted in polarity as manifested separation as like degrees/dimensions of fuckedness as like missing myself here as the whole point as the big picture.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising that so much thinking has resulted as consequence of existing here as a greedy character that fears losing and therfore created a an automated patter of fuckedness where exstensive thought/judgement is particpated within before picking a direction.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fucking with my self assertiveness as self direction as consequence of accepting and allowing myself to exist as a greedy character.  I realise a greedy character can never be absolutely certain because a greedy character always exists within fear dimensions and dimensions of fear are like self imposed prison walls that are not perceive to be existing as prison walls because  dimesnions/realms of fear come in all colours/disguises as from happy to sad and love and hate...and excitement and desire and everyt other feeling and emotion.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for exisiting as like stagnant water as like resistance to flowing water as consequence of accepting and allowing myself for being trapped within greed as like addiction to thinking as self righteousness here as like attention and focus has been on trying to fulfill greed with greedy particpations.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for perpetuating timeloops by judging actions from staring point of self righteous greed.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having feared to express and share my greed.

I forgive myself for not realising and undertanding the sharing my greed is like pushing through resistance without judgement as like walking process as working through accepted and allowed bullshit as like utilizing what is here as a means of support to facilitate process of self correction as self perfection through self realisation as know thys self.

I realise and understand that as I accept myself as what comes up within myself as feeling/emotion/thought...and I do not judge myself for feeling/thought/emotion...I assist and support myself in facilitating myself to understand the accepted and allowed nature of myself as pre-programming and therfore enabling me to make self corrections to my programming where I recognise my programming is not what is best in all ways here as equality and oneness as like fucking awesomness.

I realise being greedy and fear of being greedy are like to sides of the same coin as both are sides are in relation to and as greed and fear is the starting point.

I realise decisions that are the most difficult are because of complexity which has manifested due to exstensive fearful relationships and therfore choice is tough because choice is rooted in fear...and the situation is about making a mistake so that the nistake can been seen and realised and self corrected.

I realise that exstensive amounts of mistakes are unavoidable within process as relationship with fear as feelings/emotions/thoughts has been exstensive and that it's through recognising my faults/mistakes as self responsibility here that I enable and prove myself able and capable to self perfect myself as what is best as equality and oneness here.

I realise resistance here in transcending relationship as greedy self righteousness character that perpetuates  greedy self righteousness character by paticipating within thoughts/feelings/emotions as energetic movements dictated by fearful realtions as greedy self righteousness as thoughts/feelings/emotions.

I commit myself to releasing judgement as thoughts/feelings/emotions by having the courage and honor to face my thoughts/feelings/emotions and to use my thoughts/feelings/emotions as a tool of support as like my treasure map as like being the indicators as to points where I am required to dig deeper as like digging well beyond/below the surface.

I commit myself to digging to the depths of my being and self correcting relationship connections that are not best for all life here....and I commit myself to self correcting my relationships here as commitment to self realisation as process of facilitating self perfection....as equality and oneness here as how and who I am.