Day 795 - I Manipulate with Justification

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to manipulate myself in my world through Justification where I am existing in and as a sort of Ignorance of my living of and as the word JUSTIFICATION.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to self-sabotage myself and my participation within my world within and as the execution of JUSTIFICATION to make sense of my accepted and allowed abdications of my best potential living here as Life made manifest as the realization of myself as All as One as Equal.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize and understand how I create JUSTIFICATION as a form of Defense and Offense I administer regularly to aggressively hold myself within a state of Suppression. I realize this shows to me how deceptive I am, because within this I play dumb as a point of Inferiority, pretending I do not know what I am really doing to myself and others as I use and abuse my words specifically for a sort of reactionary play out of the truth of myself acceptances and allowances.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resist slowing down within and as Vulnerability and Patience to investigate the usage of my words to be sure that I am standing clear in and as the meaning and the specificity of my share.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be so careless within and as JUSTIFICATION.


I realize the shame within and as the way I have lived Justification.


I realize the travesty of my living and understanding of how to best express Justification.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to Weaponize Justification within myself where it's always been used from the starting point of me existing here on the field of battle, playing out my inner conflict and superimposing my suppression/depression onto the world as how I manipulate myself and others into the point of Inferiority.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize and understand the fear within and as my usage of Justification, where it has been my accepted and allowed, Inferiority and Inadequacy in me that has kept me Justifying....where I created this Need within myself to Explain my Reactions as my actions, to Justify my self-righteousness as someone who is ok, or even better than ok, someone who is good and is even in fact admirable.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to superimpose deceit within my structuring of words.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize and understand the origins of the trauma from my childhood as the source memories of myself physically integrating/learning how to Defend and Attack myself with Justification.



I commit myself to exposing the ridiculousness of Justification used from the starting point of making sense and rationalizing the explanations of failure without being asked and or questioned about such things.



I commit myself to question myself and others in and as the usage of Justification.


I commit myself to show how Justification is an effective tool in and as Manipulation.


I commit myself to use Justification as a tool of self-support in questioning my acceptances and allowances....and to from here be Vulnerable and Intimate with myself in going deep into the discomfort within and as my body...and from here, access the memories of my past where i accepted and allowed suppression as a result of not realizing nor investigating the specificity of my reactions.

Day 776 - The Ink in my Thinking as Personified Television

 



Thinking is something i have given much credence to.  I have placed so much value in thinking that it has been to my own detriment.  I'd like to make a distinction here between 'thinking' and 'looking', where thinking is a sort of random behavior without direction that we give attention to as like thoughts, things just pop up within our mind and as we give attention to it our mind continues to move and build momentum and increase it's activity production output as going deeper and deeper.  Where as 'Looking' is a self directed point of seeing into something that will often stem from a form of questioning. the question may be direct or indirectly asked within oneself as a sort of examination like process within getting to know/investigate a particular point.

For myself, i can see i have very much allowed myself to blur the lines between self-directed 'looking' and 'thinking'....where the looking and the thinking can be very much regarded as the same thing....but also within the mix is the random reactionary thought that i have gotten into the patterned habit of examining, where it's like I stop what i am solely focused on and begin a sort of juggling act by giving a certain amount of attention to this 'new thought application'.  This 'thought application' is like a random virus in the sense that my connection to it is emotional/feeling based where it typical starts off with a very small charge/pulse about it....and i form a specific impression as a 'new thought/feeling-emotion/action-reaction' and from there do a sort of spiral inward into layering the point, where it's like a sort of zap/zing suppression that is kind of like lightening in a bottle in that it is is so intense yet small yet quick, yet powerful.

Fortunately I have the tools to sort out....self-correct such conditioned behavior.

Why would I want to correct such behavior / application within myself?
What's the point?

The point is Specificity and Accountability.  Meaning, to live and create the best version of myself here.

To elaborate,  My expression and ability to perform tasks to the best of my abilities is tainted within allowing myself to be very much 'distracted/possessed' within my own Thinking.

I have seen first hand how much my mobility is limited/halted within allowing myself to drift/wander/watch my thoughts brew about a particular topic.  For example, In tree planting...a job i have done for many years, my ability to move/flow with effortless efficiency is in direct correlation with presence/thoughtlessness of the moment, where i am so committed to my physical movement and am just so here within the expression of me moving, that there is no room for any other activity, nor need.   However...sometimes i would allow myself to be preoccupied with points of thought/ideas while moving/tree-planting...and the longer i allowed myself to focus on the thinking while moving/working, the more my performance suffered as tree-planting effortless efficiency, meaning my ability to plant a tree quickly slowed down...sometimes this slowing down in movement was only a fraction of a second, and sometimes it was more.  Ironically, I was typically more exhausted at the end of a tree-planting day when i had planted fewer trees and thought more.


To be Continued

Day 766 - Complimentary Word Exchanges?

 


CHECK OUT THE VIDEO LINK HERE FOR MORE CONTEXT


Cool remarks Here by Sanders, as he rather eloquently takes a stand on addressing the typical conflictual rhetoric that is stimulated and instigated so often in our everyday discussion.


Isn't it kind of weird how common it is to be talking shit in one way or another? It's like word and world discussions, especially at the political level are fantastic examples of showcasing the everyday communication practice of Shitting on one another with our words....where it's like en epic battle royal...and everybody wants' to be the Holy Shit...but but but, Everybody is blasting off Inferior Shit...and for some misguided reason, there's a not so often talked about addiction to producing and sharing Bullshit.

The everyday addiction to participate in the practice of bullshitting is the very design of our world economy here....take a look at the symbolic BULL of Wall Street, presenting and representing the everyday Bullshit of our casino stock market.


Ironically, our words to each other, so often mimic the stock market in one way or another....because we are so full of it.....yes, Bull....but what makes this tragic story so epic....is that we fully Believe our Bull....and so much so we really Feel it...i mean these are the emotions that we are experiencing today....I mean the story of how we manufactured our very own Bull is quite a fascinating journey of Investigation.


Ironically, just like the extensive amount of alphabet agencies of Regulation, our mind has the same Bull in place...only we generally call our various Security Exchange Commission's, names like, "excuse, justification, belief, and opinion"...but rarely do we identify the specifics of it...as it is usually a mere protocol in the "making of sense" of our everyday Bull....


Sander's here showcased a rare public moment of holy shit by having a regard for his fellow mate and speaking words of a complimentary nature. Imagine a world of words of a complimentary nature....sounds Epically Awesome in all ways. Way Cool.
Word.


What is another interesting take away here today... Is how we can in fact talk about issues and it can be about the issues and not so much of a VERSUS master debate.  Ironically enough our communication conditioning seems to be rooted in this sort of Versus one another as like a master debate...ironically, quite ridiculously absurd way to to masturbate.

Day 749 - Word Recognition Continuation

Continuing from my previous post:

"So, what I would like to reiterate in this sharing here today, is the point that often times, there is a particular moment of reactionary impulsing to particular language that is used...and this is often reflected back to us or another in and as our communication. And within being perceptive to such instances. there is tremendous potential that is possible to open up in and as the moment. Here comes a point of self-honesty in and as the moment of sharing and looking and seeing, and somewhat daring to actually stop and look at what is here to investigate. I have noticed that in many instances, I was some what reluctant to actually stop and bring attention to the word in question that would come up in a moment as like a point of dissonance within myself or the person I was communicating with."

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing a reluctance within myself to actually opening up particular words within myself as points that require my attention as a remediation required to harmonize the dissonance within and as my particular relationship with the Word....so as to stop myself from accepting and allowing less than what is best as the Word...and to from within and as this regard, effectively empower myself as the Living Word Solution Here as that which is all ways always Best.

I realize and understand the process here of stopping myself...as it is is within the stopping myself, that I am able to actually look within myself and see what it is I have been accepting and allowing myself to participate within. As I give myself the opportunity to look and see what is going on as a result of first stopping, and then identifying the points within myself with specific word recognition, I am from Here able to expand myself and unlock my potential in so many ways. This Here is a structured process of specificity in unlocking self-imposed restraints as word/world relations that are less than what is best.

I commit myself to the specificity in unlocking self-imposed restraints as word/world relations that are less than what is best

Day 748 - Word Recognition and Exploration

It's fascinating to examine the specifics of our communication. Like for instance, when sharing words with another here, often times, we will pick up...or the other will focus in on a particular "word" within the exchange of many words. By giving attention to the particular word of interest...I have noticed that much potential is possible.

What I mean here, is really taking the time to elaborate and go into the various points of fascination that open up in our communications. Like specifically and for instance, in a most recent text messaging conversation i had.....I had shared many many points with a distant friend/associate....and of all the things i had shared...there was one point that came up as like somewhat of a consumption and a preoccupation. Which is interesting in and of itself, because the question opens up, as to, how often is it that, we are unable to actually practically work with information effectively here?

I mean this is somewhat reflective to the way in which our world exists here. World and Words....notice the paralleled similarities here...I mean in the spelling and the sounding here....Word and World...how closely related in relativity these point are. I mean our words make up the world so to speak as how we speak things so...as a reflection of our action...words in action make up our physical movement...the parts...the mechanics to and as the specifics of and as our motion. The movement and doing as our response abilities here....so much so as our capabilities here to exercise in and as our daily expressed/lived actions.

So, what I would like to reiterate in this sharing here today, is the point that often times, there is a particular moment of reactionary impulsing to particular language that is used...and this is often reflected back to us or another in and as our communication. And within being perceptive to such instances. there is tremendous potential that is possible to open up in and as the moment. Here comes a point of self-honesty in and as the moment of sharing and looking and seeing, and somewhat daring to actually stop and look at what is here to investigate. I have noticed that in many instances, i was some what reluctant to actually stop and bring attention to the word in question that would come up in a moment as like a point of dissonance within myself or the person I was communicating with.

What i have found to be really cool...is that by actually give care to this point...where there is a real sense of regard for the starting point of sharing as caring...and opening up such an instance as an expression and sharing of myself in a way that is cool....because I am giving from and as the principle starting point of "Give as I would like to receive"...and what I have learned within and as this Regard for myself and others is that the development potential that opens up is Awesome in many profoundly unexpected ways. You see, I see....that by making the effort here in and as particular Word recognition, we bridge the gap in and as our communication...and so it's like an enhance of the harmony between parties as like the flow of musical notes as the words we speak to one another being a complimentary aid of assistance and support in all ways Best.

I mean, if you really, really think about words,..Like really really look and see and the movement that comes up in and as how particular words are used and abused....it is really really the truth of and as our substance here....I mean...the words are very much in and as the make up tuning of and as the law of and as how and why we are being here. Interesting, isn't it?

Day 674 - The Fee Our

This blog is a continuation from my previous blog, "Day 673 - Fear is the Fare we Pay".

My sharing today is a presentation of my creative investigation....a work and play with my writing focused on "Fear"....the word....the relationship.....Fear itself.....an entity....a structured being here....

Note: this is a work in play:

"Liberated from our fear".....this is a quote I heard....which I questioned....???

If You are not Afraid of

Fear itself...You

Can do Anything

You can only Fear-less

When You Stop Fearing More...

Be Fear less

Fee Our

You can only pay less

When you Stop Paying More

What We accept and allow is our Measure of Fear...Life...Death...Value...Vote...Democracy...Creation

--> ONE MAN ONE VOTE...VOTE FOR WHAT'S BEST

TO FEAR LESS IS THE PRACTICAL LIVING APPLICATION OF SELF-FORGIVENESS... BECAUSE!

TO LIVE FEAR LESS is Self-Perfection process because this is practical living self-forgiveness...Where You Face Fear and remediate by continuing on into and as the Creation and Manifestation of Sound without the bounds of resistance...The point of "till here no further" do I allow myself to be bound and restrained by the experience of Fear.

Who Am I With Fear?

Who Am I Without Fear?

Have I Created Fear Itself? Hasn't Everything Created itself as a result of Everything Itself?

How do I Practically Value/Support/Assist Fear as what is best for myself/All Life Here?

Is there a difference between me supporting Fear and Fear Supporting Me?

Can Disharmony only exist within an Unbalanced Relationship?

Meaning:

If I stand One and Equal with Fear Here...and Fear stands One and Equal with me Here...We are managing a relationship that doesn't require management...Because here We Stand together individually accountable for Our Standing Arrangement here.

So, My standing Arrangement here is that I stand Alone as One and Equal...means... Standing in Agreement together with/as Life All One and Equal Here....Which is the Natural order of Learning the Accounting Responsibility of Harmonious Work/Play/Sound...Expression...Orgasm...Agreement...Unification...Creation...Heaven and Earth Here together as One

The testaments of time are the Living Words that can be repeated again and again as the Song and Sound that goes On and On and On as the Eternal Here that is Always All Ways Best for All. Here Hear.

To Be Continued

Day 668 - Devotion

Continuing from my previous blog: "Charisma"


"Within looking up the dictionary definition of Charisma, I had a reaction to seeing Devotion within the definition....and I thought, 'I can't use Charisma...it's too religious...I don't want to attract devotion...people being devoted'. So, what I do next is slow myself down, I say, 'Wait a minute here, lets look more closely at the word Devotion...perhaps I am jumping to conclusions as my reaction relationship towards Devotion was rather self-evident. So, I looked at the dictionary definition of Devotion. What I realized is that devotion is not limited to religious ideology and that Devotion can be applied within anything and everything that We do as Devotion can be described as aCommitment....and a Loving Loyalty and Enthusiasm within Our participations Here. So, obviously I realized that Devotion is pretty cool support and enhances self-expression/self-enjoyment/sharing-is-caring."


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for limiting my ability to live Devotion as an expression of myself that is best for all life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I compromise my effectiveness of living my full potential within my self-expression from moment to moment as a resulting consequence within and as as my relationship with words.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I created a religious conflict towards the Devotion and within that justified the practical support that Devotion enables within and as Self-Commitment and Self-Discipline.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing to be associated with the word Devotion as a result of believing that I will be confused and misinterpreted as some sort of religious type.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for diminishing the value of a word as a result of seeing one particular relationship association that I do not think is cool.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for getting temporary lost within the context of word associations...and within that...using such particular contexts to my detriment....to actually impair my ability to utilize what is best within and as my investigation of a particular Word...in this specific example....Devotion. I do see/realize/understand/know....how this one example here within word relationships/associations/contexts is connected and reflects myself standing starting point to every word that exists within myself.....Meaning....that it is a personal responsibility to let go of that which does not support me within and as word relationships...and at the same time...hold onto that which is in fact great within Words/relations/associations/contexts.

I commit myself to continuing to build strength within my vocabulary by investigating all Words and keeping what is good and disposing of what is bad...so that within this...I create sound relationships as word that form the law of my being here...as the way how to practically live words effectively that can stand and remain here through and as the testaments of time.

When and as I see myself having a reaction/energy about a Word...I stop and breathe as the means necessary to create the space and time to slow myself down and actually examine/investigate the nature of my Word relationship here...and within this...I look to make sure the engineering of my Word relationship is engineered in a way that is structurally sound...so that it exists beyond the conflict of a relationship of terms...and into and as an upstanding stability point of eternal value that will always remain.

I commit myself to practically living words as the Keys/Tools to effectiveness within and as the building and development of plans/structures/creations that are in fact always best for Life.

I am grateful for taking the time to investigate Charisma. I have bestowed and entrusted myself with Charisma. As a result of taking on such a responsibility within myself, I see how I have expanded my opportunity to Create...and how as a result of this, the opportunity and present opened up within Charisma as Devotion...and I am grateful for this. I see how my self-responsibility in self-education as words continuously expands my potential/expression/Life as the gifts that is continuously opened up and played with...like I am so grateful for all the Life Support and Enhancement within and as Words.

I commit myself to working and playing with Words.

I Devote myself to sharing my satisfaction within working/playing/investigating the nature of my relationship with Words.

I welcome and encourage the harmonious balance within and as the dynamics of Working and Playing with our Word and World Here.

Thank You

Day 652 The Art of Communication

Effective communication is like a communion of action where there is a coming together in and as an agreement. What I find fascinating about this is the very fact that this is based on comprehension of what is being said/articulated. Meaning, there can be many different points of view and perspectives within and as the communication between people...and that is actually quite cool...in fact, this is a point of sharing in and as the expansion of self-development here...where our world expands in and as the seeing of a new perspective about a point. And from this perspective here...the communication is not a battle/argument/conflict....it is an exchange of information from the starting point that sharing is caring...and sharing and caring are fucking awesome.

It's interesting to see how there is difficulty in communication when one or more parties involved in communication take some sort of offense to specific information that is shared...like, a reaction to the information is usually in the form of offense/defense...where the information is essentially not comprehended and processed effectively within one's mind....which creates a disharmony of sorts....which results in a temporary misalignment within the potential harmony and rhythm of the sharing exchange and transference of information.

What is so fascinating about communication is our movement. Whether it be verbal or non-verbal.

It has become self-evident to me that when a point is not comprehended effectively there is a reaction which results in a particular energetic movement within the body....and, this movement can be verbal or non-verbal. In becoming acutely aware of these energetic movements within self and therefore others here, one can stand within and as the self-responsibility of directing any and every disharmony that occurs within the sharing of information.

What is fascinating about taking self-responsibility, is that we in fact enable our ability to respond/communicate effectively. Ironically, without gifting and giving ourself the responsibility to self-correct and remove points of dissonance/disharmony as moments of energetic reaction,...One's ability to hear and be heard here is suppressed....which is a most unfortunate mind fuck, a tragic comedy really, because, ineffective communication is a mistake and contamination in and as one's own relationship with words/Self here.

I have noticed that within one's immediate family....there can be much disharmony in communication...because there is so much emotion and feeling related to one another....which makes the energetic reactions in and as voice tonality greater/stronger...because the charges against oneself are so much more extreme and there has been such a build of emotion and feeling within the memories of each family member....that one is often much more easily triggered when another family member speaks to them. I heard something said along the lines of, "end war in the family....and there will be no war in the world" This is a fascinating exposure here because essentially the war that exists externally throughout the World is a total mirror and self-reflection of the war of words that exist within ourselves here. So, as we take responsibility for our words and actions here, we take responsibility in remediating the war/conflicts that exist here....because the wars and conflicts that exist are in fact nothing more than a consequential outflow of improper comprehension of vocabulary.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for reacting in moments of communication as a point of impatience...in not wanting to really shut up and listen and receive what is being shared with me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being self-righteous within communication from and as the perspective of not wanting to take the time to listen and actually process and comprehend what is being shared with me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for justifying moments of blame within communication as a result of validating the use of judgement as a self-defense mechanism to super impose the position of blame. 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how communication is in fact a simple point of sharing and that communication only becomes difficult when one decided within one's mind that they do not want to be patient and self-responsible within giving and receiving as what is best for Life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the art of communication.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for investing emotions and feeling about particular words/things/people/places/behaviors and actions to such an extent that I feared letting go of the emotion/feeling/investment/relationship I created.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for disregarding my verbal and non verbal communication.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be lazy within my communication.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for disregarding my sounds within sharing my sounds here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how a contaminated vocabulary results in and as the suppression of particular self-expressions here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting to hear/listen to myself here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to take offense and defense in relationship to seeing and hearing what is here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to battle myself within and as the suppression of my sound here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to compromise and suppress my sound/movement/expression/beingness here within and as a result of participating within energetic reactions.

I see, realize and understand how energetic reactions are less than who I really am as Life.

I see, realize and understand how energetic reactions are the suppression of life substance here.

I see, realize and understand how to stop suppressing myself here.

I see, realize and understand how to direct/self-correct reactions/disharmony here.

I see, realize and understand the importance of self-responsibility within and as communication here.

I see, realize and understand how to communicate effectively.

I see, realize and understand the art of communication.

I see, realize and understand the 'art of communication' to be a point of self-movement/self-expression here as how we play.


I commit myself to playing,

I commit myself to assisting and supporting myself and others to make the best plays and be the best players here.

I commit myself to practically living awesomeness within and as communication.

I commit myself to sound communication as the self-realization that who I am as sound is beyond the self-imposed limitations of energetic reactions as emotion and feeling.

I commit myself to sharing my sounds/words/movements in ways that are best for all Life here.

I commit myself to living and applying the 'art of communication' as who and how I am here as the starting point of self-responsibility and self-awareness that always exists here beyond consciousness.

Day 650, Self-Censorship and Propaganda

This blog begins with having initially looked at two particular principles within and as the Desteni of Living Principles which can be seen in a previous blog titled " The Desteni of Living"

22. The realization that for me to be able to change myself in thought, word and deed to the most effective living being that I can be and become - I first have to 'know thyself' and so commit myself to investigate, introspect and understand how I became who I am today, to prepare the road before me into self creation of a responsible, aware, self honest and trustworthy person for myself and so for all

23 The realization that for me to be able to contribute to change in this world - I have to get to 'know thyself' as this world and so commit myself to research, investigate and introspect the inner and outer workings of this world and align the systems of today to present and give the best possible life for all on Earth

I noticed an interesting thing about myself and the behaviour of others with regards to sharing and not sharing.  The issue here is self-censorship/suppression of moments that would be in fact cool to share and in doing so would actually contribute to common sense living here as practical and physical sound support.

So, to look at myself specifically here, I had gotten out of the habit and self-created pattern of sharing daily my writing as a point giving as I would like to receive.

What's interesting about this is that within my mind I had a main reasons/rationalization that justified the validity of me choosing to withhold my capacity and capability to share my words from and as the starting point of 'practical living sound support and structured stability'.

What's interesting here, is to see exactly how I  have operated within a pattern of repetition for some time...and specifically gave legitimacy to a problem...which was me wanting to write and share more than I have previously been doing so within the past few months...and then the thought and point in question would pop up "well, it's already been so many days that I have missed that I haven't done it...if I miss another day it's no big deal....one day doesn't mean that much because I have already missed a bunch".

See here, the problem pattern I found myself within and kept myself within as a result of accepting and allowing my thought/feeling/emotion propaganda to influence my ability to actually move myself and create a new pattern/way forward for myself here.

See, it's interesting because I was accepting and allowing myself to censor my participation as a result of my own self-created internal media/backchat/propaganda/rationalizations/reasons/excuses/justifications.....and what is most fascinating about this is that I would always immediately recognize the debilitating point in question that would be the trigger to counter act my actions...as the "distraction"...and I would go into my "distraction" within the reasoning of just for a moment...and then before you know it I allowed myself to squander many moments of opportunity within myself because i decided to ride my internal high as the directionless impulse of being guided by energetic stimulation.

So, what is the point of my sharing here?

Getting out of a problem and into a solution starts with a self-commitment/self-decision to stop the repetition of the current problem. "Repetition" is a Key word here. Because, the Solution, as the way out of the problem has to be re-created over and over and over again....because the initial problem will re-surface as the preferred program play out. This happens because of our most recent past acceptances and allowances....where time and time again we made the decision to give credence to such a pattern play out....whether it was conscious or unconscious doesn't really matter....what matters is the decision that was made. So, Knowing and Seeing how this works gives one the insight and foresight to actually implant an effective long term solution for oneself.

What's interesting here also, is to see how relatively simple it is for us to be successful or unsuccessful within the practical living of Responsibilities. It's a decision. Now, obviously the understanding of how repetition works in building/establishing a level of consistency is important to Know. This here is the essence of how our Creation really works. It is is a point of Willing participation. Our acceptances and allowances determine and dictate the outcome of Being Here.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the extent to which I have accepted and allowed myself to justify, validate, reason and rationalize the censorship of myself here as my actual Life Living Potential.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for disregarding and resisting to fully examine and investigate the full extent of how behavior patterns work with specific regards to repetition.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for neglecting self-corrective precautions in and as the moments where I am faced with self changing expansion of and as my over all Life Character here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being closed minded within and as the focus on and as my wants from a stand point of there being a problem/conflict within myself that I am not certain how to resolve/walk through/sort out.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for allowing problems and conflicts to linger within myself as wants/desires that I have not practically investigated as to what are the best solutions here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for compounding suppression/censorship/propaganda within myself as a result of and as my participation within and as re-occurring thoughts/feelings/emotions

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understand the extent of self-reflection that is here internally and externally as the words "Censorship" and "Propaganda".

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the extent to which I have propagated the censorship of and as my best potential.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing to unlock total potential.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing the process of change involved within unlocking an accessing my absolute and total potential here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for trying to forget about my responsibilities in and as moments of distraction.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for participating within and as distractions from and as a starting point of escapism and egoism.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting to slow down and actually investigate the points of energetic movement within myself.  I see realize and understand how I am actually able to expand my awareness here by investigating the points of energetic value within myself...realizing and understanding the spectrum of positive feeling and negative emotion as an internal/external mindfuck that is no longer valid in and as the government of myself here.

I commit myself to stopping patterns of suppression and creating new patterns of support and assistance.

I commit myself to practically living the understanding of and as movement and repetition within and as the building and creation of new establishments here which are most excellent in nature, structure and sound.

I commit myself to stop participating within distractions within myself.

I commit myself to investigating all energetic movements within myself.

I commit myself to practical living "Self-Responsibility".

I commit myself to Sharing my words as point of practical living structured sound assistance and support.

When and as I see myself faced with a problem, I stop and breathe, I see here and how the problem is connected to a solution and that the solution stands one and equal with the problem. I see, realize and understand myself here as one and equal with both the problem and the solution. I see, realize and understand that I am not in conflict with the problems or solutions.  I see, realize and understand how I am able to direct solutions that are best.

I commit myself to standing as practical living structured support and assistance as the living of and as Sound Stability as who and how I am being here.

Day 648 - Come Petition...Calm Petition...Competition

Competition sounds like "Come Petition...and Calm Petition."

If your look at Competition from a starting point of "Participation" and "Performance", You can see that Stellar Participation and Performance is Synonymous with being/becoming "Calm".

It's interesting to notice how errors and mistakes mostly happen within a momentary blip of losing one's cool as being all together Calm Cool and Collected.

This "Calmness" I speak of here, is without conflict and is rooted in the equality and oneness of sound stability Here. No emotion and or feeling need exist because the Awesomeness of Physical Self Expression is a Performance and Participation Here beyond the veils and limitations of any and all emotion and feeling.

Emotion and Feeling is the Mind Fuck of Competition which yields less than Stellar results.

Justifying emotion and feeling within Competition perpetuates an indefinite defeat. The irony here is that there is only ever Self-defeat...and it is always all ways Self-Induced.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having previously correlated Competition with the highs and lows of feelings and emotions...and within this...associated the high feelings with winning and the low emotions with losing...and within this, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing the absurd ridiculousness of self-inducing a mind fuck in regards to the word "competition".

I forgive myself for accepting and and allowing myself for perpetuating conflict within myself as a result of and as the way I accepted and allowed the word "Competition" to exist within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having resisted to take the time to investigate my relationship within and as "Competition"

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how Competition enhances and accelerates self-reflection/self-development/self-perfection.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for negating the creative construction of and as the word "Competition".

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the starting point of Competition existing beyond any emotion and or feeling. I see/realize and understand the self-trust/self-honesty/self-forgiveness required to effectively live the word "Competition" as a physical self-expression of Who, How, and Why I am Here.

When and as I see myself looking to justify fear within competition, I stop and breathe, I see/realize and understand the self-induced trauma of self-inflicting fear upon myself to invoke particular reactions. I see/realize/understand that I am best able to respond when I do not accept and allow myself to be restrained in fear.

When and as I see myself starting to take pleasure in another's misfortune, I stop and breathe, I see/realize and understand how Sportsmanship, Integrity and Humbleness are synonymous within and as the practical living application of the word "Competition".

Day 625 Human Stupidity

Perhaps the most profound stupidity of Humanity is our detrimental reliance upon feelings and emotions within making decisions. Logically rationalizing the justification of our actions/reactions as being right and righteous within and as the makeup of our moral convictions. What is so fascinating about this, is that the basis of our emotions and feelings is rooted in and as our opinion. Like; how we choose to make believe our perception of things...Like; a forced justification as to why our perception is veiled with a particular cloth. 

What I find fascinating about about the detrimental reliance upon feelings and emotions within making decisions...is that there is a form of self-abdication of personal self-responsibility within giving credence to the existence of feelings and emotions within one-self. I see this as an excuse/justification...and a form of blame...which is a perpetuated consequence of fear/trauma within one-self. 

Now, what to do about all the feelings and emotions that exist within one-self?

Obviously, It is important to acknowledge the existence of such feelings and emotions that exist within one-self. Denying and deflecting the existence of the actuality of one's creation is not suggested nor recommended as the compounding interest of consequences will continually compound in order to facilitate the learning process as one creates more mistakes/misfortune/trauma in order to accelerate understanding/insight/clarity. This is obviously some what ironic...because it is a tragic comedy...a really really bad joke...if you can even call it that...as it is totally self-induced. The ridiculousness is completely absurd.

Here exists the opportunity to investigate the nature of one's self-definition. What is interesting within this self-investigative discovery and self-reflection is that we are faced with seeing our accepted and allowed inequality here...and how the nature of our internal cognitive dissonance has shaped our external inequality as the world horror story that exists here.

So, by daring to stand equal with every point of inequality that exists here, the opportunity is born/garnered/granted to purify/birth the nature of our very being here within and as the starting point principle of Creation(equality and oneness)...as we give like we would like to receive...realizing and understanding that the best support and assistance is always the best support and assistance. In this, here, we are able to see through all acts of deception/self-dishonesty...because we have committed our self here to and as the self-trust and self-honesty required within and as the practical living character who lives and breathes self-forgiveness as the founding principle of Life-Self-Expression-Here.

Day 615 Creation and Reaction?

So in looking at the word "Creation" I noticed that the word "Reaction" is within and as the word "Creation" when and as you move the letters around. It is interesting to see also the correlation and connection that Creation is in fact within and as the word, "Reaction".


This is interesting to me because I have been regarding my reactions as less than creation here. What I have neglected to understand and realize completely is how in fact my every reaction reveals to me my manifested accepted and allowed creation here that has become so much so automated. It's interesting because reactions reflect what has already been created...and I have been looking at reactions as the suppression of the in the moment opportunity/possibility for new creation/expression to be born/lived.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the equality and oneness within and as the words "Creation" and "Reaction".


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for regarding my reactions as less than creations.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the self-reflection in seeing and realizing and understanding how and why my reactions are in fact my creations here.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I in fact created limitation for myself in defining particular behaviour patterns for myself as a points of reaction as a result of personalizing a definition of a specific word that stimulates/triggers/generates a point of conflict/friction within myself.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I created conflict/friction/reactions within myself.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for defining reactions as bad and creations as good.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for giving a positive polarity charge to the word "creation" and a negative polarity charge to the word, "reaction"


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for getting mixed up within myself as a result of bouncing back and forth within positive and negative energies.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating particular relationships towards words with positive and negative energies.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I have fucked with my ability to play with words as a result of creating personalized definitions of words with specific and particular energetic associations.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating reactions towards words as a result of creating energetic relationships with words.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I have been passively creating my reality within having reactions. 


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how having reactions is a point of creation from and as the starting point of passive acceptance and allowance.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for abdicating creation within passive acceptance and allowance from and as the starting point of having reactions and not knowing and understanding what to do about reactions.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for taking reactions personally.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing reactions.


To Be Continued

Day 603 Fear of Conflict

I noticed that within the word Conflict I have accepted and allowed myself to attach a negative energetic charge to the word conflict.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how having a negative energetic charge associated and attached to the word conflict has impaired and hindered myself expression here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for hindering and impairing myself expression within accepting and allowing a negative energetic charge upon the word Conflict.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for avoiding particular point of self-responsibility as a result of having accepted and allowed myself for having existed within and as fear towards the practical living of and as the word Conflict.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how deliberate my self-expression with others has been suppressed as a result of fearing to generate conflict/friction within expressing myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the extent to which I have avoided taking self-responsibility for the word conflict within myself...and how the word conflict has existed as point/epitome of fear. I see/realize/understand how both positive/negative energy is rooted in and as fear.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the irony of having accepted and allowed myself to define and associate conflict with negative energy, because it is actually completely ridiculously absurd to allow such an acceptance and allowance because I have perpetuated a form of inner turmoil within myself as a result of being influenced by fear.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating fear within myself as a point of Conflict as negative energy...and within this, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I have avoided facing that which I fear as that which i have created within myself as my own self-imposed limitation/restraint.

I commit myself to releasing myself from conditioned restraints/limitations induced by conflict/friction/energetic fear within myself.

When and as I see myself existing within and as a point of Conflict, I stop and breathe, I see/realize/understand the absurd ridiculousness of taking offense/defense to the point of Conflict in question, I direct myself to investigate the dimensions/origins/roots of and as the Conflict in question, I commit myself to self-directing the Conflict within and as self-trust/self-honesty/self-responsibility/self-integrity/self-dignity/self-worth/self-grace/self-perfection as like a musical conductor/maestro conducting the symphony/orchestra.


I commit myself to see the word conflict as the word conflict without any energetic charges.

I commit myself to stop fearing to create conflict.

I commit myself to stop taking conflict personally.

I commit myself to relishing in the opportunity to self-direct moments of conflict when and as I see I am able and capable of doing so. I see/realize/understand the self-support within taking self-responsibility for directing the conflict that exists internally and externally...and I see/realize/understand that my effectiveness within directing external conflict is in fact a direct reflection of my labored ability to self-direct my inner-conflict to and as practical living solutions as physical sound stability within and as the harmonizing of myself/words within and as the starting point of Equality and Oneness.