Day 799 - Desteni and Dignity

 See the whole story here:

https://steemit.com/desteni/@worldclassplayer/dignity-and-desteni-my-vistit-to-the-desteni-farm-and-my-potential

Day 749 - Word Recognition Continuation

Continuing from my previous post:

"So, what I would like to reiterate in this sharing here today, is the point that often times, there is a particular moment of reactionary impulsing to particular language that is used...and this is often reflected back to us or another in and as our communication. And within being perceptive to such instances. there is tremendous potential that is possible to open up in and as the moment. Here comes a point of self-honesty in and as the moment of sharing and looking and seeing, and somewhat daring to actually stop and look at what is here to investigate. I have noticed that in many instances, I was some what reluctant to actually stop and bring attention to the word in question that would come up in a moment as like a point of dissonance within myself or the person I was communicating with."

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing a reluctance within myself to actually opening up particular words within myself as points that require my attention as a remediation required to harmonize the dissonance within and as my particular relationship with the Word....so as to stop myself from accepting and allowing less than what is best as the Word...and to from within and as this regard, effectively empower myself as the Living Word Solution Here as that which is all ways always Best.

I realize and understand the process here of stopping myself...as it is is within the stopping myself, that I am able to actually look within myself and see what it is I have been accepting and allowing myself to participate within. As I give myself the opportunity to look and see what is going on as a result of first stopping, and then identifying the points within myself with specific word recognition, I am from Here able to expand myself and unlock my potential in so many ways. This Here is a structured process of specificity in unlocking self-imposed restraints as word/world relations that are less than what is best.

I commit myself to the specificity in unlocking self-imposed restraints as word/world relations that are less than what is best

Day 743 - The Irony of Effort

It's interesting how we make something to be particularly effort-full in our mind...like the way the relationships have taking shape...things become a regular regulating the state of flux that is taking place within ourselves as a sort of emotion and feeling disposition.  What's fascinating I have found within learning and incorporating a new skill or ingraining a new pattern...is that the experience doesn't have to be so effort-full from the perspective of making the effort to try so hard...as like within the mind being over thinking...and exerting oneself within a point of stress because of the emotion and feeling one has created in relationship to and as the point.

Does a child create such an effort-full relationship to learning a new language....or does an adult typically place  more emphasis on the try hard effort...more likely the adult...whereas the child is just more effortlessly absorbing the material in many cases because they are at total ease within working out the point...they are literally playing within the point.

What I have noticed is that playing is key in process.

There is a definite seriousness to playfulness.

One cannot work effectively well for a consistently long amount of time with a strong stamina to have excellent output performance if One isn't at ease within and as the work/play.

Isn't it fascinating that we often take this approach to stress even within our recreational activities?

Like for instance Golf:

The golf swing takes about 2 seconds to complete.  There has been soooo much information published about it.  Most golfers or people who have ever played golf....really really struggle with the game. The interesting thing about this...is a correlation to much effort...as like a point over exertion....and increased tension due to the mind chatter within the body while attempting to move through the swing.

The golf analogy is something i will open up more in blogs to come...this is somewhat of a teaser as to what is to come.

Stay tuned, Much to look at here:

Some key words of examination will be: Tension, Strain, Effort, Agreement, Logic, Emotion, Feeling, Golf, Irony, CoIncidences

Day 742 - Brushing off a Reaction

Have you ever experienced a moment where you are discussing something with someone and the person you are communicating with gets upset rather abruptly with something you said?

I have.

I have often reacted within myself to such situations as like taking offense as a form of defense within myself towards the other person. And depending on the nature of the relationship with the other person, I would either project my emotional disdain externally back at them as a form of retaliation or I would just kind of swallow it whole within myself and keep the disdain to myself as like my own nuclear holocaust...as a result of fearing to provoke further conversation with a stranger or just out of not wanting to perpetuate bullshit.  Though the interesting thing in both instances is that I didn't really effectively remediate the situation and the situation influenced me in a rather negative way...as i had a stress moment within my body as a reaction and I didn't really do anything with it...other than maybe burying as a suppression mechanism.

Would you like to know a cool way to continue onward with how things were going in communication before the reactionary time bomb went off?

Take no offense or defense.,,,and continue onward with the conversation as to not give added attention to the shit from the perspective of building up a defense/offense within yourself. This is a point that will most likely take practice. What has supported me within this point is practicing real-time forgiveness within myself...where I see the momentary reaction within myself and the desire to be pulled within to it as like a following along within the energetic pull. One is able to become quite effective in actually stopping such points immediately and forgiving oneself for taking offense/defense to such an extent that participating in such an instance is comical from the sense that it is completely ridiculous to accept such acceptances and allowances within oneself.

Now, as you practice/play with this point...you will most likely have some outbursts from time to time...though what is cool here is that you still have the opportunity to catch/hear/here yourself within mid outburst and apply the stopping of the pull energy experience and give yourself a forgiveness gift of removal from obsession/consumption within the point and Now Listen UP...Because Here is where it gets really cool....You can Speak the Solution aloud as the Live Actor/Player Playing/making it up/happen....Where you in the moment take ownership for the situation and speak from a starting point of ease which is the self-trust free from disease...and this is the sound of Freedom is freedom is a sound...Lol. I say this is the sound of Freedom because this is a harmoniously complimentary support for yourself and the Person you are communicating with...Because you are Sounding yourself here within a point of Equality and Oneness which is a remediation and removal from allowing war/conflict to take over and dissipate the relationship flow and continuation.

This approach illustrates a fantastic example within communication where the true Authority Sounds Directs the situation from a sound point of and as Self-Responsibility. What is fascinating about this is that the person you were communicating with who was in a state of disarray will be aided to follow along with your sound as a support and assistance mechanism so that they can be receptive in receive the sound support you are giving as the Sound foundation from and as the Principle "I Live to Give, As What is Best, Always All Way."

See it's interesting here if you examine the development of human communications...we have been so very much accustomed and conditioned to following reactions as like a war of words and so there is often this underlying competition of military power in a way where it's like the biggest reaction/ bomb is the winner....and it's really silly in the most ridiculous ways if you allow yourself to become intimately aware of how you are compelled to be pulled within and as a reactionary experience that comes up within yourself in relationship to another impulsing/influencing...So here to this is to see how Lame this is because it is very much rooted in and as the acceptance and allowance of Blame as like the victim mentality of saying Oh look what they did...what they did to me....which ultimately results in the perpetuation of reaction to a reaction which is like justifying being stupid because they are stupid...which if you think about it is really quite bizarre and dare I say Stupid?

So, remember it is cool ....very cool....to address the point of reaction another person faces but...the key within this is to not get hung up on it...as like to then go into reaction yourself and get all high in mighty in and as the point of being a self-righteous asshole...because that just perpetuates bullshit and it's like war of assholes that just results in a lot of unnecessary shitting on one another....which isn't really the most effective way to directly fertilize the initial point of shit...it's like too much undigested shit...a verbal diarrhea if you will.

Again, remember that who we are here within this physical word is very much structurally sound...and so our sounds are reflected in and as our words....Our musical notes if you will....See the supporting composition to consider the duet of complimentary sharing's coming together where even if one has a slip....the other is there to catch them as like the aerobics of effectively being able to due the tango...because it takes two to tango...so it's an agreement flow point...so yo....don't diss the flow by knocking your partner in communicado by reigning shit fire on them as like some sort of army commando.

See it is funny that we are all it here as how we share...so rather take the care to prepare the best ways to pair up...so that whoever your partner is..meaning person to dance in communication with...whether it's a square or line dance or a prophetic waltz...it's all about keeping things rudimentary in and as the relationship of angles...meaning to See and understanding that we are working/playing here as complimentary angles as the best support and occasionally we will make a blip...but this is the art of the freestyle where we in the moment, Quantum styles do our individualized self-realized Freestyle that comes as the flows of the fountain we are as the water movement sound structurally sound as our Merry go Round be Here Now...continuous planting and grounding process.  Success is the Process because Pro is in the Success and we Become Professional as we Says is so so says the Process as the Pro says So.

If I lost You in the last paragraph or so,,,Maybe after this paragraph, re-read the previous two paragraphs as like the chorus in the song you are working/playing along as the Pro-fess-I-On-All...Professional Director Here.

Hear Here :)

Day 741 - When The Going Gets Tough – The Moment You're Tired

When The Going Gets Tough – The Moment You're Tired

So I am Here in this moment pushing myself to share a bit of myself here in further establishing a new consistency in writing my blogs. I have been looking at the dedication and determination within and as the Self-responsibility to actually walk appoint as the Self-Authority on making what happens Best…Best as in for myself and all others as myself here.

The point is clear here…that sharing is caring through writing antidotes of support as words that assist myself and others as myself. Therefore I see it is paramount that I push myself to make this writing happen on a daily basis.

I looked at the point of time practicality and that somebody's will be much more of a squeeze than other days. This is the nature of learning how to juggle the effectiveness of time management. I mean things wouldn’t bee challenging ever at times if there wasn’t any resistance to walk through.

This evening for instance am I quite tired and would like to get to sleep earlier than is usual. This is somewhat of a consequence of my previous day time management where I stayed on later than expected and had to get up quite early…and I had a full day of activity today. This here is like a point of parenting in a way….I mean if you have a child and the child needs attention and you are tired or were sleeping and the child is calling for you…..you may want to go to sleep but the self-authority point of self-responsibility as that which is always best is to tend to the child in the best practical ways.

I see myself as taking on the parental guidance of my own individual application. I mean I am an adult…yet I see and recognize the child within me as like I am an adult child in a way…as I very much am still intact within and as the playfulness that is a child. I see that we are all children in a way…where even though we grow old…there is still a childish nature about ourselves. This I see here where the harmony is key in and as the balance of self seriousness and self playfulness.

I am quite enjoying myself here as I flow out words a like a fountain of support that is me here taking step by step word by word to substantiate the strength of my character here in ways that are Best for myself and Everyone as myself here.

This writing here today is the push …as like I was facing the pull of the tiredness energy within myself and all the excuses were coming into my mind as like I need to go to sleep now…there’s not enough time for me to write today…I’ll just write double tomorrow as a way to make up for today….these points of immediate thoughts coming up within myself as a solution of sorts that I wasn’t even really looking for are a disguise and a veil of sorts….a trap …an entrapment…where it’s like subtle suggestions in a way to submit to less than the potential I am to stick to the dedication and determination that I am to write myself Here.

I see realize and understand how to push myself through a pull experience in the mind when and as the going gets tough and the mind wants a shutdown experience of suppression as like the overwhelming experience of tiredness where one can easily justify the death of self in a moment…where it’s like believed to be logically rational that one just physically can’t go on any further. I mean here is the self-honesty…this is the equation ….the solution….the Solution as what is best in fact…and here the support I utlize in the moment is the questions as point of assisted and supported guided direction as my moral compass if you will where I see if and as I am in fact capable and able to do more than what my mind as my internal gps system is suggesting for me as the direction for my Life.

I realize and understand that my potential ability and capability exists beyond what comes up in my mind. It is not to say that I can not have a cool supportive thought…or that all thoughts cannot be supportive in one way or another….the point I am emphasizing is the self-honesty within and as the assessment of moment management as the recognition of what is in fact my potential ability in this very moment as Me Here the standing epitome of and as Self-Responsibility.

I am noticing that great questions for myself are somewhat rhetorical as like a question and an exclamation because I see here within and as this regard…that I am so much more than what I have ever believed that I am…and this is fascinating because I am beginning to recognize myself Authority as the writer/player/director that has so many solutions in any given moment as always all ways…and there is a lot of good ways/routes of assistance and support to aid in myself pushing myself as the resistance strength training where I prove to myself that I am in fact here as Substantial Endurance and Stamina and that physical ability far exceeds my thoughts and that I am just learning to get comfortable with the recognition that I am capable of more than I ever thought was possible for myself and all Life as myself here.

Life is remarkable as we are the writers that make the marks as how we exclaim ourselves to be so as the sewing things so as to how to have sown in the best possible ways the assistance and support that is substantially great to aid in the best development of Ourselves…our cells and the whole body of everyone here as to make the self-honest contribution to Life as the realization recognition and understanding of what it means for expression to exist as “I live to Give” At Your service as the best service to myself is the best service to You…as You is me in another Life and I am You in and as this Life.” Together we are both Here. Alone Here and All One together Individuals put together to share as the “I am Here to Give to Life as I am Life.”

To Be Continued J

Day 738 - Determination

Determination - "A firmness of Purpose"


Let's play with the word "determination' for a moment here:

Determine a tie on.....like to make the connection.....de terms in at ion.....the terms of agreement.....de term in a shun......determination.....deter mind nation.....de-terms-mind-nation....de-term-my-nation....de-term-in-my-nation....the words in my being...the-words in my life....the meaning i give me....Determination is the terms as the  meaning of words i give myself to live.

The specifics of determination is in and as the precise focus of purpose....as a firmness....

Determination is the solid commitment one makes to get it done.

Determination is the set of terms one gives as the guideline principles in walking a point/goal into completion.

Determination is a key tool in and as the solidity of creation here because it's the "I got it" point where the I know this kicks in.,.The decision in I am doing this....I am committed to this...I realize that there will be obstacles along the way....But....Is the Determination factor...as like using the but...as, Yes I am the Solution and my Determination is in and as the Will of as as my way..a path to work and walk to bring about the way forward solution into and as the harvested fruition.

Determination is taking on a point to make work...as become the life force within and as the Will to Grow/live/create...as the Making it happen.

Determination: A decision to in-act potential ability as a new becoming responsibility that is developed and fine tuned.

Determination: The I Get it....I got it Done Attitude.

Determination...a self-willed and self-motivated movement that is cultivated through the roots of firmly planted principles.



The point "Determination" comes up within me here this evening as i am looking at my total blog writing's thus far....and I ask myself the question. "is it possible for me to improve upon my output?"

I would like to improve my blogging output. Yes I realize that this is very possible. I see the value in my blogging contributions. I garner specific support with every word i write. I care to share for myself and for others as myself.

I realize and understand the sound foundation that accumulates through the writing process as practical living support. The cultivation of firmly planted principles if you will.  Taking on the 7 year journey to life is a point of dedication. I would like to give myself more from my writing. Meaning greater consistency. I realize that there is many days where my timeline is more packed with things to do than it is other days. I see the point of writing as something that is just so valuable....that even a little bit is better than letting it slide.  I've played this game with myself before where i have looked at this point of writing consistency and wanting better results for myself here. The question is, Have i ever really Dedicated myself to better results? Can i dedicate myself to making a blog writing every day? Can i do this...even if i require to share multiple days writing's at one time as a matter of maximizing my tine efficiency within my days? Can i dedicate myself to finishing out the month with a blog every day? If i can finish out the month with a blog every day...can I go the next month with a blog every day?  If I can do that....can I go the rest of the year without missing a day in my blogging/writing as Process support here? I want this. Right now i am fearing to say, "I got this"...because then I am committed...and if I commit I know i can do it...and that doesn't leave room for me to fail.....which is an interesting thing...because it's like I have grown accustom to failure...and it's like I have taken on the approach of not giving myself as much as I am able out of a point of greed which is rather ironic...because what comes up in the mind is that I giving up excuses/justifications/rational as to logically make sense of non-sense as the how to way to talk myself out of best potential. The word Obligation comes up...as like without committing myself within the "I got it" point...I am free of the Obligation to get it...because it's like saying i don't totally Got it...and so whether I get it or I don;t get it...oh well...maybe...maybe not....a lack of intensity as the firmness of purpose...the narrowness in focus in completing a goal....the art of self-perfection really.

Let's look closer at the creation of "Obligation" within making a "dedication".

What's fascinating about the word "Obligation" is that it is synonymous with Responsibility and Agreement and Commitment....which are all specific points of and as 'a course of action'.

What is also very interesting and fascinating about "Obligation" is the connection to legality or morality.

So what I see here is cool....is the practical structuring of and as my Dedication...because within and as my dedication is the Determination....and within my determination is the Law of my being here as my Obligation. Dare i say moral obligation from and as the perspective and realization that the best morals are the one;s within and as the realization and understanding that there is more for all here within and and as the understanding of what's best for all is Moral as More All here...as the essence of momentum in a continuous expansion of greatness in and as Creation Here.

To be Continued

Day 724 - Complimentary Opposites

In having studied a little bit the teaching's of Wim Hof, One of the phrases he would say is, "The Cold is Your Warm friend".  And I found that to be a very fascinating statement.  I've been playing with the temperature of water within having my showers. It's been most enjoyable! Today I was finding that I couldn't get the hot water hot enough from my perspective...it's like I still experienced a slight chill within myself...and what is interesting about this..is that I have been playing with the point of getting into a cold shower...and sometimes I feel what I believe is "too cold" before I get in the shower...and so my rational is that I'll start warm/hot and then move to cold. Anyways, today I am just not satisfied with the warm of the shower, even though I got the temperature turned up all the way. Though for perspective on the temperature of heat...I think there is a safety function on the shower where it will not heat up too hot to the point where the water could actually burn you. Anyways...I'm about ready to get out of the shower...and I'm thinking that I can't do the cold water today, because I am just not warm/hot enough. I then decide to play with the temp as I go to turn the shower off...like deliberately turn the temperature dial very slowly as to kind of stop the turning of the dial on the cold temperature setting. This moment is very refreshing for me. I have a laugh as an aha moment as I am reminded of the words, "The cold is Your Warm Friend". I'm really enjoying myself and the expression of the water as it feels so nice on my body. It's like my body was craving the cold water all along by I wouldn't believe it because of how I was experiencing myself within my body...believing that the cold would be detrimental to my health.  fascinating turn of events here as I further reflect on this point as I am thoroughly enjoying this cold water flowing on me....I am stretching my body as I am present with the touches of water on my body. I am reminded of the words of another friend who recently told me about how she is always cold...and doesn't like the cold....and she said who would of thought that the cold has been the answer all along...like that I use the cold to warm up. Now I have slightly paraphrased her words but that was the message. I had been telling her about my playing with the cold and also I told her to check out Wim Hof.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to doubt methods of support because they do not make sense and are arguably illogical from the knowledge and information I have accepted and allowed to exist within myself....as like what I remember to be the truth.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the self-expansion process from and as the perspective of realizing and understanding that to grow, One has to be open to new possibilities and ways to grow that One doesn't currently already know.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I have limited my growth in many moments as a result of my judgement/belief about what is possible.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to stunt my growth from the perspective of creating judgements as a form of suppression on and as my potential here as the all ways possible to perceive/see the possibilities of expansion within a point.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how subtle the experience I am having within myself can drastically influence my best functioning abilities and ability to learn and grow as the expression of and as my natural learning ability here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the questioning involved within and as the investigation of an experience one is having...as like really checking/examining the movement within self...and within this....the willingness to further examine the point and not to allow oneself to be further engulfed within the point from the perspective of choosing to react rather than respond...because of the desire to chase after the desired feeling experience energy.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for suppressing my natural learning potential from the perspective of coping within and as the survival mentality of feeling/emotion chasing and justification. Where, what I mean by this...is that there is an engulfment within and as like fire management...where the fire as frictional energy within oneself is never stopped...but is just rather monitored and accepted and thus instead of directing responses....reactions are participated within as judged to be rational actions...when all the while a self-perpetuation is happening as a coping within and as the survival experience of being regulated by the experience of and as oneself....where the behavior is totally related to the experience of oneself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting methods of practical living support because this contradicts my survival coping mechanisms of existence as how I have come to be comfortable with what I believe to be good for me and right as like the only way here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the extent of limitation as a result of getting stuck within and as a "one way" of thinking about things...and really the staunch and righteousness of this approach that is really debilitating to the sustainable development and maintenance of oneself here.

I commit myself to the support here.

I realize and understand the "Support Here" is Always All Ways, I realize and understand the starting point of creation as Equality and Oneness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being apprehensive towards unexpected possibilities that I have not fathomed as possible.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for making excuses and justifications from a perspective of ego about the process journey to life here, as Always All Ways,...from and as the perspective of allowing backchat within mind to fester...that, Process would be too easy...if One accepts and allows oneself to garner assistance and support from everything as Always All Ways. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for rationalizing and justifying the making sense of things that don't really make sense to me...so that I can believe to understand things in a way that makes sense,..without actually further asKing Questions and thoroughly investigating the point for and as Myself Here.

I realize the tremendous support here as King Questions..as the self-empowerment of our Self Substantiation is within and as our very own Authorization as the Questions we give ourselves access to and as....for we are the very Journey/Question/Answer/Solution and the perspective and support as the dimensions of consideration are Always All Ways here as Our Very Own Self-Reflection.  The irony is Self-Profound.

I commit myself to the Self-Profound Irony Here.

I commit myself to expressing myself as King Questions...from and as the perspective that I take Self-responsibility for myself here and the process Journey to Life as the birthing/blossoming/growing/development/Creation Process Here.

I commit myself to Self-Authorization.

I realize and understand the endless possibilities here as I allow myself to look and see what is here and within looking and seeing...Allow myself to ASK Questions.

I realize the Gift within and as the Self-Acceptance as Allowing myself to Investigate Self Here as What One has accepted and allowed. I realize the effectiveness of this process is a matter of fact...as moment to moment management.

I commit myself to the micro managing of my moments.

I commit myself to self-perfection within and as micro managing.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing nor regarding the significance as the point of Self-Profoundness within as a Micro Management.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the complimentary nature of polarities here from the perspective of opposites attract as like the even and the odd fit together to make the whole picture as whole puzzle pieces....perspectives.....points of consideration fit together as the compass that is always all ways here.

I commit myself to the Profound support I have allowed myself access to.

I realize that the support and assistance all ways always here is Profound.

I am grateful for the Profound Support and Assistance Here always All ways.

I commit myself to practically living self-profound assistance and support as the dedication and commitment to self-perfection of myself here.

I am grateful to be here.

The process journey to Life is Awesome. Grateful indeed.

I commit myself to gratitude as indeed/word/thought a self-profound way to Live/Grow/Play/Work here as what is in fact best for Everything.

Day 719 - Information Automation and Integration

Information is Everything.  We are It. Tag.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating feelings and or emotions as reactions to seeing/reading particular bits of information.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for categorizing information within myself within and as a spectrum of energy as like an aura/field that I artificially invested into as a sort of belief/idea/judgement that spawned out of my initial reactions within and as my first meeting/introduction to said bit of information.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how much opportunity exists in every moment to face my acceptances and allowances as the particular energy dynamics I exist within as Information/Word relationships.  I realize and understand that I can specifically feel the energetic definitions within myself.  I realize and understand that as I participate in my day to day living my reactions to and from particular points of information is automated as like the why or why not of point's of attraction....like/dislike...energy feedback,

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for judging the energy feedback I experience within myself as I am discovering parts of myself that I wasn't really aware of what and how I was existing within and as the point. I realize vulnerability is required in opening self up to see what one has kept hidden from awareness.

I forgive myself forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resist slowing myself down at times when the potential exists for me to go into deeper investigations within myself and garner new insight and awareness about what I have been accepting and allowing within and as mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the process from consciousness to awareness is not a sometimes things, but is in fact here always in and as all ways.

I realize that by listening to my voice in each moment of participation I can hear exactly what it is I am accepting and allowing within myself as I speak each word...and that the sound is specifically structured as a direct point of feedback which indicates any particular energetic energies/mind possessions.

I realize that my body movements are indicators of the acceptances and allowances within myself and that specifically the unconscious body movement in relation to participating with others in my environment are very revealing into and as the nature of my acceptances and allowance.  I realize there is so much communication support available here to read.  I realize the support within reading the information existent here as various dynamics of physical body support. I realize and understand that information also exists here as like the energy body....where it's like from the body this energy has been manufactured as particular resonances that are rooted in the pain/conflict/abuse/friction/trauma of not realizing and understanding oneself here as One and Equal with Everything.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the absurd ridiculousness of trying to hide and or distract myself from specific acceptances and allowances that I know I can investigate/explore more and that will lead to new found awareness within myself that I have been resisting to be/become/exercise/express/live as part of my individual response abilities here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I create and perpetuate confusion within myself and restrict my ability to excel in and as self-mastery in managing/directing my reality as a result of splitting my focus from time to time...where I accept and allow a resistance to totally commit to looking at and opening up one point....and moving through that one point completely, before I go into the next point.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for thinking and believing and fearfully living within and as the automation of having many things on my mind from time to time...and within this allow myself to get discombobulated in my ability to function at an elite level of mastery and performance as an expression of excellence in and as each application/participation/task/activity I direct myself within and as.

I realize and understand the simplicity of focus on one point at a time as the Key to excellence in the specifics of performance of the activity/task/sport/work/play/writing...

I realize and understand the support we give to our self-development as the point of awareness and self-mastery when and as we commit ourself to existing within and the one point.  Meaning, if we are giving a lecture....we are immersed within and as the sharing of ourselves as the lecture...present within the point completely...here for everyone participating in receiving the lecture you are giving.  Another example is in playing a sport...where you commit yourself to moving within and as the point as response abilities to perform where the mind is engaged as a tool/map of support to aid in looking/seeing what is the best move/play to perform/exercise...and this is, with practice becomes a continuous dance and flow where it's a total working play...where you playing is a result of the work that you are doing as the player working here as the one reading/process/seeing/looking/directing the point at hand here.

I commit myself to enhancing my specificity in working with One point at a time.

When and as I see myself attempting to work with too much at once, I stop and breathe, have a smile as the realization of knowing what uselessness it is in trying to do too much at once...especially from the perspective of fear....where the application of fucking yourself by taking on too much at once becomes a sort of righteous justification that is motivated through fear.  I look at the various points that I am trying to juggle that is causing this confusion of how to best move myself...I simplify the mathematics of the points within myself and establish a clear specific number one point and then I begin with it and from there into the next point...and so with this approach I create a plan as how to best move through a series of points that were initially regarded as a big conglomeration of points all variously connected without any specific structured ordered direction for best application.  I realize I am capable of accomplishing many more tasks and performing the specifics of each and every task at a level of greatness that cannot be achieved within myself when I don't commit myself completely to the narrowness of focus, from and as the perspective of staying present in the moment with just the one point.  I realize my effectiveness in moving points becomes an acceleration point where I am able to begin directing the next point as I finish the previous one....where there is a relationship from going from one thing to the next and as I get detailed into my awareness specificity as i go from one move to the next I can enjoy the detailed specifics of my application.

I commit myself to enjoying the detailed specifics of my application/process here from consciousness to awareness.

Day 710 - Legging go of the Knee'd for Ego

Read this blog here that is a transcription of the video "Revenge of the Ego". Read the words, Hear the words. Take your time.

In writing the title for my blog here, the thoughts that came into my mind were "wait, hold on, I don't want to let go of the Ego do? Don't I maybe need it...or like is it possible for me to exist without it....what are other people saying about the ego....isn't there something about just kind of managing your ego....maybe I should investigate the ego more before I decide to commit to a title that supports the notion of letting go of the need for Ego."

I see my knee injury that I am facing as coming at a very pivotal time in my life. I have been utilizing this is a point of support. Support from the perspective of reflecting upon the consequential build up of my mind consciousness system acceptances and allowances.

I see this knee injury as being a wake up call of sorts from the perspective of like, "hey my body is telling me something....my mind has been telling me lots of things that I have been buying into as idea's that is like contributing to me existing here as Ego...Dare I say Super Ego....as a being who has been influenced and controlled by energy, the very energy i have given credence to...as the ego....the motivation...the motive to do or not do in so many instances...as the pull/push...why....the purpose having been the energy as the what I believed came natural to me as what I wanted...and my belief in being devout in giving myself everything I want...as like creating this compromising position of sorts...a self-sabotage...self-manipulation if you will....where the wants become congruent with the needs to such an extent that there is like a blur between what is actually what...and just become an auto-pilot drifter of sorts as following the code....the code i created within myself as the ego markings...the map of how I respond to stimuli...how I am able to function....like an addict....doing whatever it takes to feed the want that has become a believed need...and making this a purpose of sorts as kind of enveloping within myself create black hole.

The irony of course is being careless and negligent within heir of superiority as the super ego stronghold....which is like a beingness lock down into suppression where the ability to see and breathe is often negated as like an unfortunate result of being so engulfed within a state of one's own personality possession. I see this as the consequence of bad Accounting...meaning, the neglect of my words/actions/deeds....where the pile-up/build-up became a pressure point crystalization that was just too much....a tipping point. a breaking point if you will....an explosion of sorts was the experience of my knee in a moment of physical activity where it seemed like I should be able to bend and contort my body into such a position without consequence.  And reflecting on past instances...I see that I was in fact able to make such pivoting maneuvers without pain and injury....but in looking back, I did not have the accumulation buildup that I had when I went into this particular fall....it's like the pressure buildup was just too much....there was no escaping it.

This consequential fall is quite interesting in and of itself and I am grateful to be here reflecting on the points as I see here this is all part of me Learning, expanding my realization of what in fact Self-responsibility is. Seeing here how my neglect of responsibility manifested and revealed itself in my physical body as me participating in an activity without the ability to immediately bounce back up and recover...it's like I had the idea/belief that I should be able to..and that nothing will happen to me....yet I see I didn't even consider why I wasn't able to...as like initially my Ego was too much to even see what I have been doing to myself in and as my thought/word and deed without and even realizing the severity of how creation in fact works as the working of words as the put together manuals and instructions for how things are to be formed as the information used to build the structures. No, I didn't think it of any paramount importance for me to be so disciplined that I accounted for Everything within myself...each and every single thing.

So, Oopsie, I have had a slip up a mighty great fall...due to some seriously neglected...disregarded and regarded accounting...as my self valuation...self-evaluation....and the irony here...is in and as how I have been living my-self-created-evaluation...and so the results are specific to me here...as my relationship reflection of me here as/with/within Everything here...and fuck....it is clear that the moment to moment application of practical living self-responsibility has been less than effective..and therefore I am facing the consequences of believing Life to be the Kneed for Ego...as like the only way to function here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the kneed for Ego I created within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for believing that if everyone here is an ego, than might as well be a super ego.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to trap myself within ego.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I've fucked myself so hard within ego.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having continuously fucked myself within and as ego.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for getting lost within my own ego.  I forgive myself for not realizing and understanding the trick of ego in being for getting and the forgetting that ensues within the starting point of being all for getting...as like not seeing and realizing the togetherness of words as complimentary players here...but just abusing words as instruments of consumption.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for abusing words as a result of accepting and allowing myself to often regard words as meaningless...and to therefore never really care about myself or take myself as the living words seriously.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for seriously fucking within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for seriously fucking Everyone, Everything up.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing to face myself and take responsibility for fucking everything up.....like....always believing to such an extent...that I do not require to be totally accountable as being the One here who is responsible for Everything being fucked up.

I forgive myself for fearing my own judgement within placing myself in a position of standing accountable for Everything here. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for judging myself as being too big an Ego to actually stand as a self-responsibility completely, embodying self-ownership for the total fuckup that exists here as everything.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to get fearful in talking about Everything as a point of Existing and Life regard.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for thinking of myself as Everything...and that being like too much.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist as too little from the perspective of my potential ability to live self-responsibility here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing to substantiate myself for real with my acceptances and allowances.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for getting stuck in personality character constructions that are less than Who I really am.


To Be Continued

13/03/2015 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- >>> 01/01/21

THE JOURNEY CONTINUES,

Picking up where I last left off here:

"TOO LITTLE" and "TOO MUCH" is EGO.

Equality and Oneness Together as One WORKS WELL to  Prevent the possibility of self-compromising.

PROCESS is for the PROS TO SAY ------- > PRO SAYS #worldclassplayer

To Be Continued

Day 706 - Fun Knee

It's Funny how things work out. Like when you see and realize a connection you hadn't previously considered, or like You realize something you had been avoiding/accepting that was totally ridiculous and absurd.  Like, specifically when you get into the dynamics of the relationships...this is where the fun and the haha funny moments are as like the enjoyment of the fun that can be shared together through learning which really is in fact a caring and sharing because the caring is sharing and the sharing is caring.

Why does Fun and Knee sound like funny?

Is there some sort of connection here? What's the correlation?


Well, if you look at what is really fun or funny....the funny is fun...but the fun isn't necessarily funny...unless it's added to it so to speak...as like fun can exist with the funny...but funny doesn't really exist without the fun. because have a look, if you are closed off from having any fun...it is tough to really learn anything effectively in a way that is like aha...I get it, I got it....I see....that's funny.

Funny in and of itself is an expansive point of Fun...as like the ever expanding point of fun. Funny, really is an integral part of the learning process here. Self-enjoyment is a cool description I see here as describing a relationship which is fun and funny because enjoyment....specifically self-enjoyment is a shared point...and if you look at the make up of our cells here...I mean ourselves here....you see and hear that there is so many cells/selves here....like there is so many parts that make up the whole.

All joking a side because funny is in the ability to decide as like to see for real what is in fact what. Funny is beyond the make believe. Funny is the Know thy Self curriculum. What is funny about funny and all funny a side is that You Decide...if You Can See the Funny which is a decision...which is funny in and of itself...because it's a logical reasoning that perhaps is illogical in deciding the decision you've sided with.

How I got to the Fun Knee here as my creative writing play work here is as a result of giving extra close attention to my Knee as I am in the process of Healing a Knee Injury. It's interesting in how giving extra close attention to a specific part, the potential to create new connections and possibilities exists.

In looking at myself acceptances and allowances here, I have been facing the questions of Fun and Funny in regards to my Knee. Specifically I reflect here in the self-movement of myself within and as points of Fun and Funny as the Creative Play Work Here. See, I see and realize myself as the Orchestrator of Who and How I am within and as my participations here. Gratitude is the attitude that I am working and playing with. Sometimes this has been difficult...as I have many times tripped myself up on my own self-righteousness...which is like a hiccup in effective breathing/seeing here as what is what for what it is.

What is opening up here for me is the abdication of the Funny and Fun within myself where I have allowed and accepted myself to move along without regard for the fun and funny within and as the work I do here. This strain I have done onto myself I see reflecting my knee injury as my current inability to walk effectively, as my body has revealed to me here...'stop...you cant walk like you've been walking....you are facing the consequences of accepting and allowing accumulated restraint/strain that has now manifested itself in the form of an Injury...as the inner jury no longer will continue as the strain and restraint.'

Interesting it is to see the funny in the serious and the fun in the serious as the serious fun. I find it interesting that there often comes to be a dissonance or a disconnect from the fun when there is seriousness. This sentiment of "seriousness" I see as the 'Adult' mind...as like the losing the fun of childhood and perhaps trying to get back to it...or maybe having lost it all together and not even realizing what has been lost because one is so enveloped in the "serious".  Like for instance I do not recall as a child having the same extent of mind activity...thought action as I have today....and I am not certain that all the thought action is a good thing...as I have noticed that often the though action can be of a serious nature...as like the 'police man in the head' kind of thing where there is always some sort of systematic judgement and stereo type casting taking place...and it's like really a money calculator when you see things for what they are simplistically....because the way money works is also within and as the emotion and feeling of the body whether it is positive feeling or negative emotion...both are perpetuating the dependency and the continuation of one another...and so the mind of though/feeling/emotion becomes like an individualized calculator of accounting the individualized and specialized self interest and regard for the very self created frequencies of one's particular value.

It's interesting to see how my creative writing play here has taken a turn into looking at the mind and money in regards to the adult...


To Be Continued

Day 677 - Effort-full

"I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having resistance to learning with effortless ease" Day 676 - Life...Learning...Teach Ability...Opportunity and Fortune

This statement jumps out at me as I re-read through my previous blog entry. I ponder on the point a moment and I look at the process of development a child learns to walk within the actual skill of walking...and specifically the process of going from learning to crawl...to crawling...to standing...to falling and standing up...and actually waddling a step or two...to eventual walking effectiveness.

Within looking and regarding this process...It is quite the process and it is in fact effort-full There is a self-willing commitment to actually explore and push the development of potential which is the result of constant and consistent experimental application...practice and repetition...and a fine tuning.

So, within re-reading my initial statement I share above here with regards to an effortless within learning...I see here how I have placed an expectation about my idea of how I have believed the learning process should be. This is not necessarily the case within learning new skills. In fact some things will require much more effort than other things. And, to only learn that which comes effortlessly...would be in fact a squandering of one's actual learning potential here...because perhaps it is the commitment in learning the things that are the most challenging for ourselves that are in fact the most rewarding. I say this, because....look at the self-discipline and the self-commitment....and the self-perseverance...and the self-dedication....and the self-patience....and really.....this exemplifies the tenets of what is in fact self-mastery.

Learning something completely that is an effort-full process is rich in educational nourishment....because the the process's involved within learning anything from beginner level to a masterful level is to be rooted in the fundamental principles which substantiate an overall character development of an elite level standing. Meaning, there is no real short-cuts on the journey process of Life Mastery.

I am reminded of an example where this Ninja warrior is being asked by an aspiring Ninja how many different punches he knows how to do...and before the Ninja Warrior can even real respond....the aspiring Ninja begins spouting off all the different types of punches that he knows. The Ninja Warrior explains that he is not threatened by the the Ninja who knows 10,000 different punches he has practiced very little....But is in fact greatly concerned about facing the Ninja Warrior who has practiced a single punch 10,000 times.

The point of my sharing of this story here...is on the commitment and discipline required in and as self-perfection. Which to me exemplifies the natural learning expression of Life. Where one is able to meticulously study oneself in one's movement relationships here.

SO,

This is a point that has come to my attention within my Life....where I have had a tendency throughout my Life to learn things for a little while....when and as the learning came easily without much effort or work on my part. Then what has happened in many instances...is where I shift my focus to learning something else...where I lose interest in continuing what I initially set out to do. This tendency of mine I have notices as a result of myself always looking for the path of least resistance...and actually having conditioned myself to avoid seemingly effort-full commitments to actually expanding my comprehension within a particular subject beyond my current ability level.

This is something I am committing myself to changing. Changing specifically the reluctance within myself to continue on a point of self-mastery within particular areas I have actually really wanted to excel within.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating ideas and beliefs about how I should feel within learning something new...and the process of self-perfection.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for tainting the process of self-perfection by having pre-conceived...make believe ideas about how the aftermath of self-perfection within a particular point is in fact.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for justifying my impatience within the difficulty of learning particular tasks...skills.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating judgement/friction/conflict within myself in relationship to the amount of time it takes for me to learn and effectively comprehend a particular point.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for burdening myself within the guilt and shame which I experience within reflecting upon all my failed attempts to actually comprehend a particular point and physically administer perfect execution of said point.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for giving credence to giving up on myself when and as I am faced with difficulty.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding that the real testaments of individual will is in fact the commitment and devotion to oneself when faced with difficulty.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for shying away from difficulty within my participations here in this world.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing difficulty.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the irony of myself inflicted difficulties I have done unto myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having created an apprehensiveness towards difficult tasks.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having avoided to really examine the extensiveness of my very own apprehensiveness as like a self-ingrained defense mechanism to avoid actually seeing the painful truth of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for choosing to minimize my creative influence within our shared World System...because of the fact that I see this requires great effort on my part.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for neglecting my creative potential when and as great effort is required in developing creative contributions here that are in the best interests of myself and all Life here. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for neglecting my creative potential because it takes effort.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having a negative polarity connotation towards the word "effort"
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having cringing thoughts/emotions about "effort" as like an ugh exhausting type experience.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing a resistance towards effort that can be torturous at times.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for torturing myself as a result of having an ineffective relationship with and as the word "effort".

Effort: Strenuous physical or mental exertion.
            A vigorous or determined attempt.
            The result of an attempt.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for defining strenuous physical or mental exertion as something that I want to avoid most of the time and only participate within it if I feel/believe it to be absolutely necessary.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have conditioned my effort to exist in relationship to my particular emotion and or feeling about exerting effort in the particular moment.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being unreliable within my participations as a result of accepting and allowing myself to be conditioned by my thoughts, feelings and or emotions that pop up suddenly within a moment with specific regards to a point I am looking at.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for self-sabotaging my ability to participate in learning things effectively and efficiently.

The word 'Effort" is rooted in the Latin words, " Ex + Fortis....which means ...Out + Strong"....which lead to the old french word "esforcier"....which leads us to the word "effort" we have today.

In looking at the "Out + Strong" of the Latin roots of Effort....I see that effort is a result of breathing out an exertion of self-expression....a living of life force essence....a particular strength in character being exhibited within a particular focus as a result of and as the living of an outer strength. I see and understand this outward expression of effort being the result of an inward commitment of oneself to share the expression of oneself outward and onward. And therefore I see effort as a tool in self-development....a tool that assists and support our process development here.

I commit myself to living Effort as an Outward strength of Character.

I see realize and understand that to live Effort as an outward strength of character is to live an inward strength of character. As within and so without.