Day 265 Today has been such a fun Day, I Feel Like Celebrating with a Cigarette

 



Today is day 9 without smoking cigarettes.

Today I had lots of fun skiing and towards the end of the day I had thoughts come up with in my mind as, " I should have a cigarette tonight.....well I could at least smoke a cigar...I never said I would quit smoking cigars....I could totally smoke a cigar without welching on self commitment to quit smoking cigarettes."

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire to want to smoke a cigarette as like to stimulate a high experience within myself as like celebrating today for having so much fun skiing...as like giving myself a reward for having so much fun.

I forgive myself for accepting for accepting and allowing myself to have suppressed so much fun within myself as like a regular all the time 24/7 occurence.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire to celebrate having fun through out my day as like believing I need to reward myself for having fun and enjoying myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to suppress 24/7 enjoyment/fun within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for desiring to smoke tobacco as like to get the hit/sensation of nicotine to assist and support the stimulation of a high experience within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire to smoke cigars as like a loophole way into having some tobaccco while keeping a clean not smoking cigarettes stat.

I forgive myself fro accepting and allowing myself for looking for ways to manipulate myself commitment to stop smoking.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define tobacco smoking as like a stimulating treat that's charged with positive energies.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fuck with the feelings and emotions that exist within myself as consequence of smoking tobacco as a define positive stimulant.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use tobacco as like a downer to regulate myself from coming down off energetic high experiences.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing self sabotage in the past with regards to smoking cigars as a way to believe that I am not cheating myself in quitting smoking all together.

I forgive myself fro accepting and allowing myself to believe that I need tobacco to celebrate an awesome day filled with self enjoyment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being greedy in thinking that I need tobacco to really make today a complete filled day of awesomeness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel incomplete of absolute self enjoyment and awesomeness without having tobacco to smoke.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have created a dependent relationship on tobacco where I use to fuel mind stimulated energies within myself as feelings and emotions.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not accept myself as satisfying tobacco.

I realize the ridiculousness of creating a dependency on smoking as like a form of stimulation that I need.

I realize that I am satisfied with myself enjoyment today and that I do not require a smoke to feel completely satisfied with myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself tp have connected so much feeling and emotions to smoking  and not smoking as like whether I have smokes or not.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have created an energetic love for smoking.

I realize the ridiculousness of accepting and allowing myself to consume myself within thoughts of desire to smoke any form of tobacco.

When and as I see myself desiring to smoke tobacco for any particular reason, I stop and breathe and I direct myself to focus my attention elsewhere as like to deliberately ignore backchat thinking about desire to have tobacco. I realize the ridiculousness of accepting and allowing myself to consider giving into desire as temptation as like something I flirt with and look at and see if I just lose control and fall victim of emotional and feeling reaction as like a form of abdicating self responsibility. I realize the ridiculousness of abdicating self responsibility in self commitment statements.

When and as I see myself looking to create reasons as to why it would be ok for me to smoke tobacco, I stop and breathe and realize the self sabotage within this line of thinking as like backchat mind desire play-out looking for a way for me to lose control of my mind and relinquish my ability to conquer my mind as like becoming a master mind as someone who understands the totality of the mind functionality programming

I commit myself to honoring self commitment to quit smoking.

I commit myself to understanding the self commitment to quit smoking as meaning not smoking anything...that there is no room for loophole.

I commit myself to utilizing opportunity here in daily writing about my release from smoking.

I commit myself to learning about the functionality of my mind programming by investigating how I had created thoughts/feelings/emotions about smoking and tobacco.

I commit myself to sharing ridiuclousness of thought/feeling/emotion relationships as like reactionary play-outs that are indicatorts of mind possession as like being out of directive control of physical equality and oneness..