This blog is part 6 of a series of 21 within a series about qutting smoking, stopping habbit addiction and examining relationship processes that go along with changing mind conditioning.
This is the 6th day in a row I have not had a cigarette. Everyday since I made commitment to sopsmoking cigarettes, I have had thoughts come up within me about smoking. Today, I questioned the point with regards to how many other points are there in my life where I am totally controlled by whatever comes up in my mind?...Like the point comes up and I have a desire to pursue/fulfill it....like being moved by a feeling based on having a thought about acting out such behaviour.
Today, I considered that in the past I would just follow through with having a smoke, pretty much whenever I had thought about having a smoke....I mean sometimes I did question my thought process and I would delay acting upon thought....and other times I would act immediately on thought. Sometimes I would just see how long I could stall hesitate before follow train of though as like acting out direction from thought.
Looking at the fact that I've acted out my being here through my thoughts as like my movie script in me being here....I mean that's kind of ridiculous.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to move accprding to thought from the perspective of my directions come from my thinking.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realise and understand that my self direction can come from my thinking from the persepctive that my automated thinking is showing me what I have to work with here as like what I already created relationship connections withi and as and therfore the points for me to work with in clearing all dimensions of separation so to insure equality and oneness in always as structurally aligning myself with a sound foundation as what is best.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have resisted facing the question of how much have I been influenced by my mind process's as like what comes up in my head as thought and thinking.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realise and understand that by examining and dissecting my relationship with smoking, I can apply the insight and understanding to other areas/parts of my life as a means and way for me to assist and support with process of self correction as the necessary means to insure self perfection.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have created a relationship with my thoughts as feelings as like forms of deisres which are like money vouchers that I want to cash in by participating within and as, as like consequence of thirsting for the energetic high feeling experience.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realise and understand my thoughts and thinking as like money vouchers of different values....and thatmy reactions are accorrding to the size of the money voucher....as like the greater the size of the voucher...the greater the extent of charged feeling/emotion.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have not realised and understood how I connected smoking cigarettes to being like so money because I defined smoking cigarettes as feeling really goood.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realise and understand that I am capable and able to increase/expand self stability within myself as the consequence of learning from my acceptances and allowances and enabling myself the opoprtunity to re-allign all acceptances and allowances to what is the absolute best for Life.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to choose to disregard some mind conscious sytstems because of the feeling/belief/emotion that taking on all mind consciousness systems as the pop up in thought would be too much and too extreme as like that would be a full time job in living self correction.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to resist living self correction as like a full time job/self responsibility.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have resisted going full out with work. I forigve myself for accepting and allowing myself to have a tendency to try and do as little as possible as like to see what the bare minimum achievement is ...so that I can be successful while doing the bare minimum.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire to be succesfull as consequence of doing the bare minimum.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resist living every point of myself full out....like all the way to my greates potential capabilities.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resist daily application of hard work as like putting in a constant and consistent effort of self willed determination as like the understanding and knowing that I am making the most of my time here and I am grateful to be able to utile opportunity here for as a means of practical living self support.
I commit myself to pushing myself to doing more with my time as like to increase my daily efficiency in terms of what I am able to accomplish on a daily basis as a means of assistance and support.
I commit myself to sharing insights and understanding that have come from investigating relationship with smoking.
I commit myself to utilize smoking investigation and quitting smoking as like a buffet of assistance and suppor for practical linving walk of process.
I commit myself to becoming more physical.
When and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself glossing over thoughts/feelings/emotions as points of introspection, I stop and breathe and I realise my thoughts/feelings/emotions as tools of support and assistance in investigating and purifying the nature of my beingness here.
When and as I see myself making a big deal about particular thoughts, I stop and breathe and I direct focus onto understanding energetic labellings as like degrees/dimensions of separation that are keeping me secluded from operating and existing as equality and oneness. I realise the ridiuclousness of creating signifigant value about particular thoughts as like playing the energy buxx value system game based on trying and desiring to be as high as possible.
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