Day 474 Interest Alignment

I suggest checking out the Life Review "Isolating Myself within an Interest".

Some points of reflection for me, in regards to the sharing in the Life Review:

I see and realise how I have in many instances throughout my Life, deliberately isolated myself according to a particular self-interest.

I can recall as a child, being selective with my friendships, where for the most part I was only interested in spending time with people who wanted to do the same things that I wanted to do.

I recall around the age of 12 or 13, thinking that there wasn't really any point of being friends with people who weren't interested in hockey....because at the time I was obsessed with hockey...and if someone didn't share the obsession with me I didn't see the point of really developing a friendship.

I see how throughout my life I have kept alive this peculiar reasoning as the basic formula within developing or not really developing relationships with others.

I see and realise the ridiculous absurdity within perpetuating dismissing relationship connections because there is a point of difference within and as the point of personal preference.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for holding onto personal preference as the base foundation within choosing to develop relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for continuously throughout my life, finding reasons to dismiss the continuation of relationship development and expansion.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for continuously throughout my life, projected blame upon others as being not good enough for me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being blinded by my accepted and allowed self righteousness within relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for neglecting to face myself as the point of accountability within the demise of so many relationships throughout my life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being self-righteous within the demise of relationship connections.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be stubborn within the collapse and suppression of relationships within my worlds.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not valuing myself and relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for neglecting to nurture and really care about personal relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for dismissing myself from relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating reasoned justifications as to why relationships end and collapse.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for lacking the balls within relationships to really put in the time and effort to develop relationships of mutual benefit.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having an extremely limited view of what is mutual benefit.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having difficulty to see and realise and a good bond/connection/relationship can be formed without sharing the same obsession/hobby/interest.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being quite shallow and one dimensional within relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for disregarding the multitude of connection points within a relationship.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing for neglect to give and share support.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to self-sabotage myself within relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for undervaluing relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for neglecting to maintain relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being hard on myself within seeing what it is I have accepted and allowed with regards to patterns and tendencies within the formation and development of relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understanding how the patterned cycles of compounded and compressed within and as a reflection of my acceptances and allowances within relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understanding how my past history has repeated itself within relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for making up different energetic values for people based upon the self defined judgments I create and accept and allow within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing self-defined judgments within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for limiting my perception to self-defined judgment formations as the information I see...and within this I forgive myself for not realising and understanding how the information I have see has been a reflection mirrored to me as the nature of my internal relationships...being exposed externally.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating reasoned justifications as to why passed relationships that were abandoned, cannot be reclaimed and re-built.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for holding onto the experiences of guilt, sorrow, shame, and disappointment within see and realising the blatant disregard I accepted and allowed within relationships that I participated within.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for bailing on relationships as a point of self-interested, self-righteousness, as like to keep the illusion going that I am fine.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for extensively judging people's interests.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being self righteous about behaviour and interests.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understanding myself as the source of that which I despise. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting to take full accountability here for my experience. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating so many layered justifications as ways to deliberately deceive myself from seeing the origins of my accepted and allowed history of consequence.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting to take and give the time for expansion within relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to sabotage myself within relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being insecure within relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing inferiority/superiority to contaminate relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for neglecting to cherish my every relationship.

I commit myself to honoring and valuing relationships within integrity and dignity as Equality and Oneness.

I commit myself to cherishing relationships.

I commit myself to re-kindling relationships that have been neglected and ignored.

I commit myself to giving enabling myself the gift/opportunity of self-expansion within relationships.

I commit myself to stop wasting and disregarding relationships.

I commit myself to stop regarding relationships within only one dimension.

I commit myself to moving out of a one dimensional view and into a multi dimensional view.

I commit myself to making time available for the development and growth of relationships.

I commit myself to keeping communication alive within relationships.

I realise that within our present day and age of instant ability to communicate with others, there is no excuse for letting communication die within relationships, due to lack of participation....because participation is readily and easily available.

When and as I see myself creating reasoned justifications and excuses for non participation within communication and relationships, I stop and breathe, I direct myself to express myself within moments of having resistance to doing so. I realise and understand the absurd ridiculousness of deliberately sabotaging relationships within and as self-righteous thinking and judgment based in feeling/emotion/backchat.

When and as I see myself fearing to communicate with someone who it's been so long since I last communicated with, I stop and breathe, and I realise and understand the absurd ridiculousness of fearing to speak to people I have enjoyed communicating with. I see the funny as the absurd ridiculousness...and I realise and understand the point of nourishment I give myself within process by taking the time to laugh at myself, as like seeing and realising my acceptances and allowances...and laughing as a point of intimacy...as a point of learning from myself and therefore expanding myself by enabling myself to see beyond limitation and therefore welcome myself to ever expanding potential.