Day 201 The Benefit of Doubt

The benefit of Doubt.  Give me...Give them the benefit of Doubt.

Ok, So I have been holding the point close within myself and kind of monitoring it as I have had my doubts about the benefits of doubt. lol.  It's kind of funny how in looking at this point I have had a tendency to try and define the point within polarized energy as being either a positive thing or a negative thing.  Also the point of doubt coming up within myself as like starting to doubt what makes sense because that is not part of my already programmed conditioning.

The benefit of doubt seems to be a mind fuck.  Like, imagine going to the hospital for a surgery and the doctor says to you, "do you have the benefit of doubt?.....Tell you what, let me give you the benefit of the doubt and therfore assume you are telling me the truth even though it looks like you may have taken drugs that could comprimise the surgery....not to worry because we will be exercising the benefit of doubt as like a self defense mechanism/coping tool as a way of avoiding to face possible conflict as brutal truth and self responsibility."

Doubt is a shitty benefit. (see later within post how a shitty benefit can be utlised as a point of self support in etablishing self trust as the starting point of self trust starts with self and releasing self doubt)

Doubt definitions:

  verb (used with object)

1.

to be uncertain about; consider questionable or unlikely; hesitate to believe.

2.

to distrust.

3.

Archaic. to fear; be apprehensive about.

verb (used without object)

4.

to be uncertain about something; be undecided in opinion or belief.

noun

5.

a feeling of uncertainty about the truth, reality, or nature of something.

6.

distrust.

7.

a state of affairs such as to occasion uncertainty.

8.

Obsolete . fear; dread.

 

Reference: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/doubt

 

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for using doubt in deceptive ways as like a self defense mechanism as like to shift responsibility away from myself as like to avoid seeing with clarity the total situation.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for believing doubt to be a benefit that is in the best interest of all life here.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising the benefit of doubt can only exist when there are trust issues....and trust issues can only exist due to lack of self trust.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for doubting and questioning my self trust as like being hesitant about trusting myself and therfore fearing to trust myself within decisions and resposnibilities as like self commitments.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing self trust.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having looked for comfort within the benefit of doubt as like not being totally certain and therfore not considered liable/responsible for any consequences because I was exercising the benefit of doubt as like disregarding the evidence and the facts and going into a belief of deciding on something based on whim as like choosing to ignore the the bulk of evidence as realisation and understanding because that would result in a different decision.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understanding that the benefit of doubt as to make decisions that are illogical as like to ignore the physical evidence here in making sound decisions under the guise of hope.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for connecting doubt to being a benefit or favour.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for trying to make the word doubt either positive or negative in its connotation.

 

I forgive myself for not realising and understanding the benefit of doubt exists as to assert and prove rightness as like self righteousness as like being right.....as like the benefit of doubting what was being said was that there was a belief in the slight possiblitly of asserting righteousness as like being right and getting the results you want and hope for.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising the connection between self righteousness and the benefit of the doubt.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having participated within doubting from and as the starting point of self righteousness and greed as like to protect my personal bubble world of specific perceptions of this how I like things to be.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understanding the nastiness within the benefit of the doubt which is portrayed under the guise of niceness.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not considering and realising that giving someone the benefit of doubt is like accepting and allowing the doubt to conitinue to exist within self.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for accepting doubt wihtin myself as like a way of avoiding facing the truth of myself.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for holding onto doubt as like an excuse and validation that I can't possibly understand everything about myself and be without doubt because there is just too much of me here.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for connecting doubt to being overwhelmed and use doubt as the excuse/resason/justification to dismiss clarity/certainty/undestanding within myself.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for existing within doubt as like a an egoic form of self preservation.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for holding onto doubt within myself as like a way of preventing and circumventing the death of my ego.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for accepting and allowing myself for validating the benefits of doubt as like a way to avoid facing conflict within myself and within others.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing to face conflict and therfore use doubt as a self defnese mechanism as like to hide my eyes from seeing the truth of existence.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing to be attacked if I do not accept and allow the benefits of doubt.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understanding that doubt is perpetuated because of fear as like various reasons of ridiculousness as a means of avoiding the conlifct that is here....when in actuality, doubt perpetuates the conflict that is here because particpating in doubt is liking hoping and wanting conlifct to be sorted out without taking a self directive position in bringing about conflict resolutions as sustainable solutions that are are best for life here.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understanding that I cannot exist within absolute certainty within myself as long as I exist within and as doubt.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for desiring and hoping for absolute certainty within myself.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself fro having manipulated myself into positions of absolute certainty from within a dishonest starting point as like neglecting equality and oneness and therfore not realising how I manipulated myself into believing myself as absolute certainty through and as the consequence of accepting and allowing 'the benefits of doubt' to exist within myself.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for believing in the benefits of doubt.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising that the benefits of doubt are like a self deceptive manipulation tactic to feel good and to avoid possible friction that is already existing benearth the surface to rear its head and been seen and exposed.

 

I forgive myself for not realising the benefits of doubt as like being able to keep secret and remain hidden the forbidden knowledge and information as like the accepted and allowed truth of the situation.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing peoples emotions.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing doubt to exist as as a benefit.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for manipulating my actions as a means of manipulating the actions and responses of others.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for for avoiding to speak in ways that may incite emotions within people as like bring up shit that is being hidden beneath the surface.

 

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing to take self resposnibility for the shit I incite within other people here....and I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising my self direction within and as self support and assistance as like directing situations/solutions as what is best and therfore handle as a point of self direction any and all reactions as like an effortless ease I am able to facilitate with patience and perseverance as self willed life commitment to what is best always here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for doubting Life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for doubting myself as Life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having made reasons/justifications/excuses/limitations upon Life as accepting and allowing myself to have my doubts about Life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not trusting Life.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for doubting self trust.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting to trust people and therfore excercise the benefit of doubt as like accepting and allowing myself to not trust a point and then to follow along with the point anyway.

I forgive myself for not realising and understanding that as I trust myself I can trust everyone as I allow myself to stand as a reflection of everyone here and therfore I able able to hear clear what is being said and therfore there becomes no need for belief in and as interpretation as I become a sound guy as like equality and oneness in and as physical structural sound as like the making I am becoming.

I forgive myself for not realising and understanding that doubt exists as like wanting more feedback for a situation to bring abut clarity and certainty.

I forgive myself for not realising and understanding doubt as a tool of support to assist and support with clarity and understanding.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for believing that there cannot be good and bad points about doubt.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating a conflict scenario between good and bad as like trying to circumvent the bad with the good and not really considering the cycle of good and bad and how the value of good and bad exist as like complimentary as like one doesn't exist withiout the other as like good and bad being relative.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understanding that in a world of abuse....doubt as a benefit may act as a cool point of self suppor tin establishing stability as like taking onself to the point of nothingness where you trust nothing....not even yourself....till here no further,...begin a new...as like to start with self trust...and as self is understood....Life is born from the physical....as and within self trust as no doubt about self/life/here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for blaming my relationships with words and phrases here as like so to point the finger as phrases and sayings as for example " the benefit of doubt" as like to form sort of belief as to how to operate within accordance and relationship to the benefit of doubt as like a separate entity from and as the benefits of doubt.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having separated myself from and as words and phrases and created relationship beliefs about words and phrases as like operational rules of condes of conduct as like how I am suppose to act in relation to certain words as like reactions when and as I hear specifc words and phrases spoken.

I forgive mysel for accepting and allowing myself for having created rules as like coding within myself as beahvioural reactions within myself according to specific valuses assigned to words and phrases of words.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having manipulated the value of words and phrases to be out of wack as like totally misalligned.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having fucked with sturctural ressonance allignment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having created a structural resonance alignment as like a scale of values as like competing values in competion with one another.

When and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself reacting to words/behaviours/patterns here....I stop and I breathe and I accept and allow myself to look at point of self compromise as defined valuse assements from within and as the starting point of asserting and proclaiming and defending self righteousness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having limmited and suppressed my ability and capabilitlies to here with clarity as like without reaction/judgement.

I forgive myself for not realising and understanding that my ability and capabilities to hear with clarity and certainty here are enhanced as I take self responsibility for each and every discrepancy within myself as like my structural resosnace allignment system as like the scale of values that is in disharmony with life harmony.

I realise the sound game I have been playing within and as energy participations as like how I choose to hear what is here based on how I have chosen to define what is here with and as my sounds and therefore chosen to categorize my hearing and seeing here within and as feelings/emotions.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having alligned my existence here to that which I desire and like based upon self interest as feelings as like what I have defined my feelings to be as like the desired positive buzz for myself to experience bliss.

I realise ability as self respnsibility to direct solutions which are best for all life in every moment are compromised within uncertainty as like doubting self responsibility and capabilities as consequence of accepting and allowing myself to react and fear to being here,  as clear and capable hearing here to listen to all given positions as like the certainty in hearing with clarity the truth of the sounds.

I commit myself to certainty in sound.

I commit myself to listening and devlopping clarity from listening with a clear ear as like to hear what is hear without judging what I hear.

I commit myself to letting go of the benefits of doubt as like coping mechanism...and I enable my self trust here as like the compensation for letting go of the benefits of doubt as I choose to no more hide and defend myself from being attacked.

I commit myself to sharing common sense solutions.

I commit myself to playing as commen sense simplicity.