Day 146 Arguing for Arguments Sake

 

So I noticed that sometimes I would argue just for the sake of arguing.  It's like sometimes someone would say something to me and I would react within resistances as like self defense mode...as like to go into argumentative mode in making sense of logical reasoning as to why I was right and what the other person was saying was wrong.  It's like at time I resist agreement in seeing and sharing the common sense that is being presented as like gift giving.

Example: Today I was playing golf and a couple of times I was informed before I hit the ball that my body alignment was kind of misaligned and that I was aiming way way left of my target...like way left. Both times I was informed of this I immediately went into defense mode as like to protect myself from being wrong as like to assert my being right as like my righteousness. It is also funny to note that in both instances I sprayed the ball way way left of my target.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for responding to criticism defensively.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing criticism.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for reacting in fear to criticism.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting assistance and support in self correction.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating difficulty in admitting fault.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be a defender of ego as like to argue for arguments sake as like to assert and fight for limitations as self imposed self righteous addiction.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising how automated my defense systems have been in generated comments/remarks to assert self righteousness as like self suppression from self correction as like self agreement.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting the assistance and support of others.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for believing that receiving lots of assistance and asupport from others is a sign of weakness as it would require me to admit and acknowledge and correct my faults.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing to see my faults.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing to embrace my faults when I recognise that I have made an error in the moment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for arguing for self imposed limitation.

I forgive myself for not realizing the ridiculousness of myself in arguing and resisting practical assistance and support from others as like just obvious common sense.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing that I am being directed by my feelings and emotions when I accept and allow myself to engage in arguments.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for competing with people within and as communication.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for experiencing a loss and for fearing being at a loss when somebody says something that brings forth an opportunity for self correction as the potential exists for me to recognize my mistake and correct it in the moment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting self correction in the moment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating excuses and reasoning as like bullshit justifications as to why I cannot do self correction in the moment I have recognized a fuck up.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself  to have difficulty within facing all my fuckups as like mistakes.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing to be seen as a being who fuckups and makes mistakes.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for holding onto negative emotions about mistakes as like incidents where I fucked up and did not perform from a starting point of what is best for all life here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for defending my mistakes/errors/fuckups with justifications/excuses as like validations to assert my emotional turmoil as like to give myself the perception/illusion that I am balanced within my emotional turmoil as accepted and allowed resistance to embracing mistakes/errors and moving on with self correction.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for dwelling within mistakes and errors as like prolonging self induced consequence.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for prolonging self induced consequences


I realise that as I allow myself to slow down and be here in and as breath as a breathing participant here...I am able to respond in situations as what is best for all life here within and as the simplicity of common sense.

I realize when I suppress myself in and as breathing awareness participation...I react with emotions and feelings and I am unable to respond within the moment as common sense practical application as what is best for all life here.

I realize the ridiculousness of arguing for self imposed limitation.

I realize I had programmed into myself a self automated defense system of argumentative reactions as ego protection to hide from the truth of myself as brutal self honesty as who I am at the core of my being.

I realize as I face mistakes/faults/errors/dishonesty I enable myself responsibility here as practical self corrective living.

I realize that embracing all my reactions is a cool point of support that assists and supports me in facilitating change that is best for all life here.


When and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself to go into defense mode as like to argue for my self imposed limitations within and as excuse and justification as like stringing together bullshit logic to assert self righteousness....I stop and I breathe and I expose accepted and allowed ridiculousness of myself as like woah...ahaha...hahhaha...i see the point....and yes, in the moment I express gratitude to the being that assisted and supported me in seeing that was able to be self corrected in the moment.

I commit myself to in the moment self correction.

I commit myself to sharing the awesomeness of embracing reactions as a tool of support in seeing and realiing accepted and allowed ridiculousness.

I commit myself to self correction as self perfection here as life birthed from the physical.

I commit myself to becoming self honesty always as like constant consistency.

I commit myself to exposing the ridiculousness within and as my process of self perfection.