Day 35, Self Righteous Competition Comparison

 

So in writing my previous blog the point surfaced hours later about self righteousness in connection to compettion as a point of comparison/self compromise. I had labeled compettion as a big primary point within myself and  I negated really seeing the self righteous connotation as starting point of allowing competion within myself.

letting go of self righteous competition is like wow ok awesome let me begin here with some self forgiveness on the point.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing thoughts within myself where I judge and compare others against myself as inferior and not as worthy as I am as being a great and and noble being because of allowing myself to consume myself with thoughts about others self imposed limitations and why they are not as good as me as a result of such acceptances and allowances.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to boost my ego as self righteous competition as a superior being by participating within thoughts about whay other beings are doing that is fucked up...I forgive myself for not realising how fucked up it is for me to thinhk about what other beings that are doing that is fucked up and judge their participation within and as fuckedness and therfore creating levels of fuckedness within myself...and I therfore forgive myself for not realising that accepting and allowing leveles of fuckedness is totally fucked up and in no way is supporting oneneness and equality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising how I have throughout my life allowed myself to connect self-righteousness to competition and to justify self righteous competition as survival of the fittest and that it's all about winning and that losing isnt fun and that my fun is connected to winning and being the winner and being the best and believing myself to be better than the best...like I am on another level than best...like I am above the best...I forgive myself for not realising how I separated myself within the point of being better than the best by not seeing myself as equal to the best and wanting desiring to be better than the best and therfore create the belief that I can be better than the best as a result of accepting and allowing inferiority within myself and therfore creating a self righteous persona to camoflauge the accepted and allowed inferiority within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to build up a self righteous persona as a way of self preservation by accepting and allowing myself to believe that if I dont protect myself from others I will be harmed and limmited....and therfore I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear others and therfore believe that I need to project a persona of myself as greatness because of the accepted and allowed inferiority definition acceptances and allowances within mysels as less than.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for using my immediate family memebers as stepping stones in building up a self righteous persona based in competition that I project and proclaim my greatnes to and see my immediate family as less than me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for giving attention to inferiority/superiority througha and as comeption self righteous judgement as my accepted and allowed social profilling/scanning/way of seeing.

I forgive myself for not realising that my ability to see what is here has been compromised by accepting and allowing self righteous competion within myself which has created always seeing forms of my self imposed judgement within and as a polarity spectrum of better or worse as more than or less than.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for separating myself from myself through and as self righteousness as accepted and allowed competive judgements.

I forgive myself for not realising that I have accepted and allowed myself to be competitive within my judgements to make sure I am protected as a winning investment always at the expense of losers around me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for wanting and desiring to be worshipped and idolized and adored and admired for greateness/superiority as s supreme being who is better and more than others and therrfore proclaimed  as a celebrity icon.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for wishing I was born into royalty...like if someobody has to be superior in the superior/inferiority polarity complex game...why not me...I want to be the winner and not the loser.

I forgive myself for not realising that throough the acceptance and allowance of self righteous compettion judgements I HAVE ACCEPTED AND ALLOWED INEQUALITY TO EXIST by particpating within and as inequality as polarity consequence as being a loser that wants to be a winner not realising the harm that has manifested from accepting and allowing a rat race to exist as the human race of compettion based on the starting point principle of wanting/desiring to get ahead/win/greed as a result of fear of loss.

I forgive myself for not realising how from an early age I was developping strategies/personalities within myself to protect myself from and as fear of loss and being a loser.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing to be a loser and wanting/desiring soooooooo much to be the best and greatest winner ever and therfore believed that I just have to design and build myself up as the greatest and best winner ever and therfore that is what I will be as I believed that what I believe is what I will achieve because the rhyme does the time as the consequence manifestation as acceptance and allowance that I want and desire.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for wanting and desiring consequence ans a result of accepting and allow self righteousness within myself as compettion and judgement within myself from the perspective of being separate through accepting and allowing polarity friction to exist within me as a mind consciousness system based on charging energy from my body as feeling and emotions and not realising how abusive it is to charge myself up as energy as like a feeding off myself for an upper or downer moment as a result of wanting/desiring consequence.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for spiting myself through accepted and allowed projected and proclaimed self righteousness particpations.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realsing how exstensive the point of self righteous addiction within myself has been as a primary point of attention within my mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for getting annoyed and frustrated with pity for believing that people who are not self righteous anf feel sorry for themselves are like not getting it.....lol...I forgive myself for not realising that accepting and allowing self righteousness within myself has been a mask/coping mechanism for feeling sorry for myself for accepted and allowed self loathing/inferiority.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having created an automated system within my mind as self righteous judgement comparison ego booster winning confrimation coding as thoughts which place me in the position of superior to other beings or thoughts about self proclaimed greateness and thoughts/imaginations/picturing praise and worship for goodness/greateness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being such a cry baby within myself by accepting and allowing such whining as projections of self righteousness that are connected to complaining and emotions and feelings as looking for self validation as favoured reactional responses as energetic charges as emotions and feelings that will feed ego as energy within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself as separate from all the other selves here as each individual self.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself comparison and competion as accepted and allowed self righteous justification in relation to all form that is here as physical substance.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for projecting the idea that I am superior form of physical substance that is greater than other forms of physical substance.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for judging and comparing self righteous compettion comparsions memories within myself as past moments.

I forgive myself for not realising the extent to which I have accepted and allowed various degress of judgement as leveles of self righteous compettion comparison as levels of fuckedness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing leveles of fuckedness within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating a difficult time in expressing the awsesomeness of DIP course and process and what I am doing within it on a daily basis as a result of accepting and allowing self righteousness within myself as superior being who is able to see and here common sense and people who do not know about dip course and process are inferior and therfore won't get what I am saying if I am brutally blunt in my speaking specifically self honestly and precise.

I forgive myself for not realising the effectiveness and art of self expression as communication has been limmited within myself as a result of self righteouss compettion comparison judgements.  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing limitation within and as sharing/living words as a result of holding on to self righteousness/compettion/comparison from the startin gpoint of accepted and allowed spearation as polarity energy fluctuations.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing the feeling of emptiness as not being posssessed by any energetic charge as emotions or feelings as an experience of nothingness within myself that brings about the question of who am I without any feeling or emotion as an energetic charge possession as manifested consequence as polarity complex equations.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for clinging to the past in self definition as points of describing and answering the question who am I.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for holding onto memories of self righteousness within myself as moment of winning and greateness.

I realise the effectiveness and art of self expression as communication has been limmited within myself by myself by accepting and allowing self righteous compaettion comparison judgements.

I realise the extent to which I have accepted and allowed various degress of judgement as leveles of self righteous compettion comparison as levels of fuckedness.

I realise that accepting and allowing self righteousness within myself has been a mask/coping mechanism for feeling sorry for myself for accepted and allowed self loathing/inferiority.

I realise how from an early age I was developping strategies/personalities within myself to protect myself from and as fear of loss and being a loser.

I realise how abusive it is to chrage myself up as energy as like a feeding off myself for an upper or downer moment as a result of wanting/desiring consequence.

I realise  that throough the acceptance and allowance of self righteous compettion judgements I HAVE ACCEPTED AND ALLOWED INEQUALITY TO EXIST by particpating within and as inequality as polarity consequence as being a loser that wants to be a winner not realising the harm that has manifested from accepting and allowing a rat race to exist as the human race of compettion based on the starting point principle of wanting/desiring to get ahead/win/greed as a result of fear of loss.

I realise that I have accepted and allowed myself to be competitive within my judgements to make sure I am protected as a winning investment always at the expense of losers around me.

I realise that my ability to see what is here has been compromised by accepting and allowing self righteous competion within myself which has created always seeing forms of my self imposed judgement within and as a polarity spectrum of better or worse as more than or less than.

I realise how fucked up it is for me to thinhk about what other beings that are doing that is fucked up and judge their participation within and as fuckedness and therfore creating levels of fuckedness within myself

I realise the disillusion of thought consumption as feeding self righteous comeptition comparsion as accepted and allowed self compromis/self sabotage as totally unacceptable and not cool and that it in no way support life.

When and as I see myself accepting self righteousness within myself as thoughts accepted and allowed compettion/comparsion,..I STOP, I Breathe and I realise the fuckedness as the completely absurd ridiculousness of accepting and allowing such bullshit participations within myself.  I allow myself to let the thoughts go without reaction and realisation that I am in the process of self correction as self perfection and therfore my effectiveness is determined within and as dilligence as consistent application and walking patience with humbleness and grace as the courage and honor to know thy self and face thy self and get'r done as birthing myself as life from and as the physical by utilising all my capabilities/potential and oppurtunitites as awesome assistance and support facilitating self realisation as oneness and equality here as a labor of love.

Day 34, Competition Comparison Judgement Fear Motivation Movement

Day 34, Competition Comparison Judgement Fear Motivation Movement

Ok, so my title says much.  Initially I was just going to write competition and the words comparison, judgement, fear, motivation, move, movement were connector words to the point of competition as these words signify the relationship I have developed within myself in and as competition.

So in my last writing the point of competition became more evident to me as a primary point within me.

I’ve been observing the competition relationship I have developed within myself and I have also noticed the point of ‘attention seeker’.  I had noticed previously that attention seeking was due to low self worth/inferiority as a point of seeking validation and approval from others as a way of self validation.

I see the competition point in relation to attention seeking going back to my early childhood years as I was the eldest child in my family and I can recall points of wanting my parents to see me do something well and praise me for it...like something as simple as a cannon ball big splash into a pool or some sort of time trial to see how fast I could do something...and these are just two examples...and ironically or not...this relates to me here today at my current job where I have been accustomed to boasting and bragging about my tree planting performances when I planted an extreme amount of trees/made an extreme amount of money on the day...also I notice I don’t tend to boast when my performance doesn’t seem so extreme...and also that if I have an extremely poor performance...I would justify it...kind of like a form of self pity.

So today, I recognized the point and tendency to seek praise for sharing an exceptional score and I stopped myself as I didn’t see it necessary to go out of my way to promote a great performance...as I felt guilty that I would be placing myself above of others and that wouldn’t contribute to great feelings of others self worth...it’s like to be recognized as superior I got praise from people who considered themselves inferior to me...and that is totally fucked to support inequality through superiority/inferiority relationships.

So, I’m going to open up self forgiveness on the point of competition and the connections i’ve made to completion as mind relationships...and ya, here I go:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for believing that I cannot move myself effectively if I am not in competition.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for believing that if I am not competing than I am in fact giving up and unable to move myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing fear of failure as a motivation as self competition for wanting/desiring to succeed in whatever I do.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting losing/loss.

I forgive myself for not totally realising that success and succeeding and performing and in fact doing anything really well is the result of past failed attempts and learning from the mistakes/failures and transcending limitation and creating an exceptional presentation of and as self realisation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for looking for competition outside of myself in relation to others from and as the point of comparison.

I forgive myself for not realising that competition starts within me as the point of self perfection as to reach my fullest and greatest potential as every moment is the patience that is required to be walked along side perfection.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for attaching self worth and self validation as points separate from myself by receiving praise from beings who perceive themselves as less than me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to desire to compete from the starting point of separation as self loathing as inferiority with the desire to be appreciated and praised as great and righteous.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for judging myself as performance functioning with feelings/emotions as polarity swings of up and down and yay or ney based upon past memories of previous performances.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for comparing myself against others as separate versions of me that I am in completion and competing for superiority and self validation with and as.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting people who are attention seekers like me looking for self validation and self praise for their various antics.

I forgive myself for not realising the people I resist the most and have the greatest reactions to are showing/revealing to me the greatest point within myself that I am attempting to suppress and deny.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing judgement, comparison, motivation, fear and movement to be connected words to competition as an energetically charged word within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing me to manipulate my sharing’s to the point of what will provide me the biggest reaction and recognition from the person I am sharing a specific point with.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for sharing from the perspective of self validation and self praise.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing any desire/want/need for recognition of attention seeking or self validation from peers and parents to boost self worth.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that recognition is nice and that I would like to receive it from everyone around me and that I am pissed at my parents for not praising my greatness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react in vain as frustration and irritation at the point of looking at how ridiculous my acceptances and allowances have been in separation of the self realisation oneness and equality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating a negative charge about competition and placing myself as in competition with myself as self fragmentation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for believing that competition is bad and results in only abuse, not realising that I was accepting and allowing an abusive nature of and as competition and competition redefined from the starting point of oneness and equality results in and as self perfection in accordance with patience and self forgiveness application.

I realise that I was accepting and allowing an abusive nature of and as competition and competition redefined from the starting point of oneness and equality results in and as self perfection in accordance with patience and self forgiveness application.

I realise the people I resist the most and have the greatest reactions to are showing/revealing to me the greatest point within myself that I am attempting to suppress and deny.

I realise that competition starts within me as the point of self perfection as to reach my fullest and greatest potential as every moment is the patience that is required to be walked along side perfection.

I realise that success and succeeding and performing and in fact doing anything really well is the result of past failed attempts and learning from the mistakes/failures and transcending limitation and creating an exceptional presentation of and as self realisation.

I realise that I am here as the opportunity to live self correction as self realisation from and as self forgiveness application and that I am shown to myself when my application has been less than stellar and therefore I can self correct myself as self perfection with and as the patience that I am and therefore I walk here as oneness and equality always.

I realise each being is here as the point of assistance and support for and as the competition as self perfection to reach our greatest potential and capabilities as self fulfilling prophecy as oneness and equality as what is best for all in all ways here.

I realise letting go of competition as a polarity manifestation is an act of self empowerment as an enabling and enhancing self perfection as the self willed movement as diligence and determination to get this done absolute as the authoritative point of and as self responsibility to live what is best for all in all ways here.

When and as I see myself separating myself from and as the point of competition by reacting to competition/competitors as separate from me...I stop, I breathe and I realise that I am here as the point of competition as equality and oneness as self perfection as patience and the self realisation of equality and oneness to walk a point into absolute completion to the best of my abilities always from the starting point of and as my best work/performance/pure/raw/self-expression/self-fullfillment/self-realisation/self willed movement/self love/nourishment and care as a guardian and care taker of existence/universe.

Day 33, Fear of Regret

Day 33, Fear of Regret

Ok, so I’ve experienced regret within past relationships and I noticed this evening that I fear experiencing regret again...and I am experiencing like a constant regret as a result for accepting and allowing regret.

In my current relationship with my girlfriend...since the very beginning of our relationship I vowed never to end the relationship because I had regrets in the past about ending relationships with girlfriends...and it’s like I feared making a fuck up again...like fear of experiencing regret and so there’s been many instances where I am like this relationship is not going to last or I tell myself that this relationship has to last forever or I’m fucked...like if I don’t commit to this relationship then I am letting myself down.

Within reading the above paragraphs I see the fear of loss

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing to lose a girlfriend.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for thinking about spiting myself and breaking up up with my girlfriend to protect myself from fear of loss because if I just breakup with my girlfriend then I will not unexpectedly lose her.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for thinking that things would be easier if I didn’t have a girlfriend.

I forgive myself for not considering that a relationship into an agreement as self commitment is and requires work and isn’t always easy so to speak.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having commitment issues because of the fear of loss and the fear of regret.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing to walk self commitment with my girlfriend.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for judging my girlfriend like I’m in a competition and to consider that maybe my girlfriend isn’t the best competitor to be in a completion with.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for making my life like a completion where I experience regret when I lose because I don’t like to lose and every time I lose there’s regret.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing regret.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for believing that I must commit to this relationship forever or I will experience eternal regret.

I forgive myself for not realising that I have created a mind fuck within this current relationship that I am in based on accepting and allowing the fear of regret.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel like I am stuck within this relationship and that I am damned if I end it and I am damned if I stay within it.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for holding onto regret.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising the ridiculousness of fear of regret as like making myself like a fragile statue that will fall apart if there is any movement/self direction.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing making the wrong decision.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for desiring to make the right decision.  I forgive myself for not realising that fear of making wrong decisions and desire to make the right decisions exposes the point that I’ve made many wrong decisions based upon self dishonesty and the desire to make the right decision.

I forgive myself for not realising the point of self doubt within myself connected to the fear of loss and by me not wanting to lose and therefore I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for judging my relationship with my girlfriend.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being competitive about my relationship with my girlfriend and consider the thoughts that if I was with another girl perhaps I would be more winning so to speak.  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for always trying to win and I forgive myself for accepting myself as always at a loss and therefore I am always striving to be the winner.

I realise that I no longer have to carry regret around with me or fearing to experience regret again because that is ridiculously absurd and that I forgive myself for allowing myself to hold onto experiences of regret.

I realise that the relationship/agreement that I am in with my girlfriend is cool support that supports me in letting go of mind consciousness systems.

I realise that by being in a relationship/agreement I am faced with all the shit I have accepted and allowed within myself and therefore relationship/agreement in work and that I am in the process of building a sound foundation as equality and oneness.

I realise that judging my girlfriend is ridiculous as she, like everyone else is in their individual process of self realisation.

I realise that placing myself in constant completion as my beingness is ridiculously absurd and exhausting.

I realise I win by allowing self-fulfilment by letting go of trying to win and competing with myself by always thirsting for more and never being satisfied or self fulfilled because of the desire for more winning

I realise that I created a mindfuck within my current relationship with my girlfriend by holding onto the point of fear of regret, fear of loss and completion.

I realise that I can’t lose and I’ve already won by committing to myself as process of self realisation as oneness and equality here.

I realise that fear of making wrong decisions and desire to make the right decisions exposes the point that I’ve made many wrong decisions based upon self dishonesty and the desire to make the right decision.

I realise I accepted and allowed self sabotage within myself by allowing the point of self doubt within myself connected to the fear of loss.

When and as I see myself participating in my mind as thoughts about my relationship with my girlfriend based in judgement/completion/fear of loss/regret, -I stop, I breathe and realise the ridiculousness and absurdity of self doubt within going down the rabbit hole by boarding a train of though and feeding the train fuel by participating within thoughts by reacting to thoughts with feelings and emotions.

Note: this writing here today assisted and supported me in seeing another point that I did not realise and that is the extent to which the point of competition has influenced and consumed my conscious mind.   Competition seems like the main point within my conscious mind that consumes me...more writing is required on the point of competition...so I am taking this moment to make note and point out competition to continue with my writing about...so tune in next time as I face the point of competition as a primary point that has consumed my mind.

Day 32, Directing The Flow

Day 32, Directing the Flow

Ok, so today is my day off from tree planting and there are many tasks for me to accomplish in a limited amount of time. My day off is my one chance in the week to have a little bit of internet time. I used the internet to post my daily writings in my journey to life series and to submit my DIP assignments. Also I had to pay a cell phone bill. My access to the internet cam this morning and I had to be persistent in order to accomplish all these tasks.  The people that I was in the motel room with were anxious to leave the room and get going and I had to keep focused on the tasks at hand.  I experienced slight anxiety/stress within myself about finishing my computer tasks before I was out of time. It’s like I felt a little bit of peer pressure to hurry up or just stop what I am doing because my peers are bored and want to check out of the motel earlier than the allotted/scheduled check out time.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to compromise self direction as a result of peer pressure as external influence.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to worry about my peers and their self satisfaction

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hesitate about directing every moment of myself as the flow of my go.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for judging myself as selfish for directing myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for defining, ‘selfish’ with a negative charge.

I forgive myself for wishing other beings were more proactive in directing the flow.

I forgive myself for not realising the flow as the mind consciousness systems seamlessly flowing and playing out. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for confusing self direction with the flow.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for getting annoyed at beings that seem to be lacking self direction.  I forgive myself for not realising that getting annoyed at beings for lack of self direction is because 

I am annoyed at myself for lacking self direction in every moment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing self direction to be perceived as a chore/work and I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define chore/work as negative and to be avoided and have resistance towards.

I forgive myself for not realising gratitude and gratefulness for self direction capabilities.

I realise as a creator I am self responsible for directing myself.

I realise self direction starts with presence of breath.

I realise self direction as oneness and equality entails pushing through resistance because of self suppression as separation through and as mind consciousness systems.

I realise I am alone in standing as self direction.

I realise the flow as the mind consciousness systems seamlessly flowing and playing out.  I realise the difference between mind consciousness systems flowing within me and self direction within me as stopping mind consciousness systems.

When and as I see myself resisting to direct myself/life, I stop, I breathe and I realise I am the starting point of self direction as oneness and equality.

Day 31, Jealousy and Arrogance

 

Day 31, Arrogance and Jealousy

Ok, so I didn’t realise the connection between arrogance and jealousy as both points involve the point of comparison and inferiority/superiority. I’ve noticed lately how I am always comparing points or attributes of others against myself.  For instance, today I compared this dudes super white teeth against my not super white teeth, I compared another dudes arms to my arms...his arms were more muscularly defined with veins his veins bulging out...mine not so much. I had thoughts about how many trees another being had planted...specifically a being I place myself in competition with. I recently wrote about the point of competition and the ridiculousness of being possessed by winning versus losing.  I didn’t realise the points of arrogance and jealousy in relation to completion as a result of accepting and allowing comparison, inferiority and superiority to exist within me.

A while ago I realised the nastiness of jealously and vowed to myself to not participate in acts of jealously about women...specifically a girlfriend.  I never considered that I had points of jealously deeply rooted within myself that have affected every relationship I have or had.

I see the arrogance design as projecting a better than appearance while feeling inferior and I see the correlation with jealously as I have allowed constant comparison within myself as like a relentless completion I am in based in comparing pictures/results/data/separation.

Another point that I see I have connected to both arrogance and jealousy is self judgement.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising that I had accepted and allowed arrogance and jealousy within myself as a result of self judgement, inferiority, superiority, nastiness and comparison.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself as inferior compared to other beings.

I forgive myself for not realising and living one and equal with all beings here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for automatically comparing myself against other beings that I deem, ‘better than me’.

I forgive myself for not realising I have been limiting my interpretation/understanding/self realisation of equality and oneness as a result of accepting inferiority/superiority through self judgement based from a starting point of comparison of ‘better than me’ or ‘not as good as me’

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for defining picture presentations as better or word than me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for projecting arrogance and jealously as a result of accepting and allowing comparison within myself and energy fluctuations as instability as inferior/superior.

I forgive myself for not realising I have accepted and allowed conflict within myself by accepting and allowing comparisons and what comparisons actually are as jealousy and arrogance when inferiority, superiority and self judgement are accepted and allowed to exist.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for seeing myself as less than the being whose arms were more muscularly defined than mine.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to compare the whiteness of a beings teeth against the whiteness of my teeth and think and believe that the being has better teeth than me because his are whiter and therefore he is better than me because he has white teeth.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be jealous of a particular being when he plants more trees than me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for thinking bullshit thoughts about the being as nastiness justifications to validate self pitying that I except the being as better than me and that I justify it based on the fact that I am better than the being at other things and therefore the being is jealous of me about other skills that I have that the being does not seem to possess.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing a competition mindset.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing self judgement within me based from the starting point of comparison as self judgement accepted and allowed competition that I am trying to win.

I forgive myself for not realising there exists no actual competition within myself as oneness and equality being physically here and that the competition I have perceived to exist is a result of mind delusions as mind fucking which is the result of accepting and allowing comparison based on picture presentations I see and therefore creating a skewed value system which results in energy fluctuation as being out of sync with oneness and equality as a harmonious balance/stability.

I forgive myself for not realising the correlations between jealousy and arrogance as wanting to be noticed through accepting and allowing the point of comparison from the view of being validated by others and the results and rewards I receive.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being jealous of the being who sometimes plants more trees than me because he is taking attention and praise away from me from the perspective of being noticed by others.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for wanting and desiring to be noticed and appreciated by others.

I forgive myself for not appreciating and noticing myself here within all my acceptances and allowances.

I forgive myself for not realising that I was holding onto a point of inferiority within myself and that I was coping with inferiority with jealously and arrogance through accepting and allowing comparisons/self judgement and fluctuating energy levels as feelings and emotions as a result of playing the poles of polarity as inferiority and superiority.

I forgive myself for not realising the gift that is available within judgement as the realisation that, hey this is me here and that I am seeing a point about myself here and If I see something I define as ‘better than me’...I am that point too and therefore the being that is expressing/exposing the point to me is giving me a gift that I can express as myself as that is the oneness ad equality of our beingness as we are the same image and likeness. Meaning that I am grateful for all the support beings are sharing with me as points of self realisation as self perfection as oneness and equality here together again.

I realise the gift that is available within judgement as the realisation that, hey this is me here and that I am seeing a point about myself here and If I see something I define as ‘better than me’..I am that point to  and therefore the being is expressing/exposing the point to me as giving me a gift that I can express as myself as that is the oneness and equality of our being as we are the same image and likeness.  Meaning I am grateful for all the support and assistance that beings are sharing with me as points of self realisation as self perfection as oneness and equality here together again.

I realise that I was holding onto a point of inferiority within myself and that I was coping with inferiority with jealously and arrogance through accepting and allowing comparisons/self

I realise the correlations between jealousy and arrogance as wanting to be noticed through accepting and allowing the point of comparison from the view of being validated by others and the results and rewards I receive

I realise there exists no actual competition within myself as oneness and equality being physically here and that the competition I have perceived to exist is a result of mind delusions as mind fucking which is the result of accepting and allowing comparison based on picture presentations I see and therefore creating a skewed value system which results in energy fluctuation as being out of sync with oneness and equality as a harmonious balance/stability.

I realise I have accepted and allowed conflict within myself by accepting and allowing comparisons and what comparisons actually are as jealousy and arrogance when inferiority, superiority and self judgement are accepted and allowed to exist.

I realise I have been limiting my interpretation/understanding/self realisation of equality and oneness as a result of accepting inferiority/superiority through self judgement based from a starting point of comparison of ‘better than me’ or ‘not as good as me’

I realise living one and equal here is without judgement and comparison as arrogance and jealousy.

I realise I letting go of arrogance and jealousy is letting go of self imposed limitation and enabling self expansion here as limitless potential as self expression.

I realise I had limited self expression as a result of accepting and allowing arrogance and jealousy within myself as a result of accepting and allowing of self judgement as conflict friction as a result of creating separation within myself to place myself in competition with parts of myself.

I realise that my mind is a tool of support to show me my acceptances and allowances so I can face my acceptances and allowances with brutal self honesty to that I can eradicate fuckedness within myself  as manifested consequences as a result of accepted and allowed separation through self judgement/comparison/inferiority/superiority/nastiness.

When and as I see myself accepting and allowing points of comparison within myself, I stop, I breathe and let go of the ridiculously absurd acceptance and allowance of self comparison/self judgement as I realise the self imposed limitations of accepting and allowing self judgement/comparison as completion.

When and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself to be arrogant, I stop, I breathe  and I realise the ridiculousness of accepting arrogance within myself as allowing built up inferiority within myself and the attempt/want/desire to be noticed as superior.

When and as I see myself accepting and allowing acts of jealously within myself, I stop, I breathe and I look for the gift to give to myself as the point where I accepted and allowed judgement in creating the point of jealousy. I am grateful for self examination as the gifts of support/presence of self realisation as oneness and equality here.

Redefining words:

Jealousy:

I’ve experienced jealousy as this uncomfortable emotional possession that is like an intense reaction that is always negatively charged.

Dictionary definition:

jeal·ousy adj. 1. Fearful or wary of being supplanted; apprehensive of losing affection or position. 2. a. Resentful or bitter in rivalry; envious: jealous of the success of others. b. Inclined to suspect rivalry. 3. Having to do with or arising from feelings of envy, apprehension, or bitterness: jealous thoughts. 4. Vigilant in guarding something: We are jealous of our good name. 5. Intolerant of disloyalty or infidelity; autocratic: a jealous God. [Middle English jelous, from Old French gelos, jealous, zealous, from Vulgar Latin *zlsus, from Late Latin zlus, zeal; see zeal.] jealous·ly adv. jealous·ness n. Synonyms: jealous, covetous, envious These adjectives mean resentfully or painfully desirous of another's advantages: jealous of a friend's success; covetous of my neighbor's possessions; envious of their art collection.

The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition copyright ©2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Updated in 2009. Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

Playing with the word jealous:

Gell us...jealous..j-eal-o-us..gell us..like put us together because there is a disconnection here through accepted and allowed separation which has me experiencing emotional turmoil as energy fluctuation based upon reaction. Disapointment of wants/needs/desires based on acception and allowing emotional suppression and therefore a separation exist that needs to be re-connected and the resoult is jealousness as the accepted and allowed separation has gelled apart creating a gell us as jealous....gell...like jell us..like guuue us...like the glue as substance that keeps us all together has been unglued...

Jealousy:

Results from emotional reactions from within and as a point of energy fluctuation as instability which exposes nastiness within oneself as accepted and allowed separation as a disconnection and therefore a reaction results from the disconnection of not realising self as the image and likeness as the point where jealousy occurred as a reactional disconnection/separation.

Jealousy also results from accepting and allowing self judgement by accepting and allowing comparison and energy fluctuations as superiority and inferiority complexes within self as a result of suppressing equality and oneness as self realisation.

Arrogance:

I’ve experienced arrogance as wanting and desiring to be noticed for my apparent specialness/greatness that is based from a starting point of comparison to others and being portrayed as better than others which is a result of accepting and allowing inferiority within myself and therefore desiring/wanting an experience of superiority which is a positive energy charge as a way of releasing the negative energy charge. This has caused me to flip flop with energy fluctuations within myself between highs and lows...and working hard to suppress the low and always remain high as Mr. Superiority when in fact the ugly truth is accepting and allowing myself to exist as Mr. Inferiority. I’ve therefore viewed arrogance as a negative energy charge.

Arrogance dictionary definition:

ar·ro·gant   adj. 1. Having or displaying a sense of overbearing self-worth or self-importance. 2. Marked by or arising from a feeling or assumption of one's superiority toward others: an arrogant contempt for the weak. See Synonyms at proud. [Middle English arrogaunt, from Old French, from Latin arrogns, arrogant-, present participle of arrogre, to arrogate; see arrogate.] arro·gant·ly adv.

The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition copyright ©2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Updated in 2009. Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

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arrogant [ˈærəgənt]

adj

having or showing an exaggerated opinion of one's own importance, merit, ability, etc.; conceited; overbearingly proud an arrogant teacher an arrogant assumption

[from Latin arrogāre to claim as one's own; see arrogate]

arrogance  n

arrogantly  adv

Collins English Dictionary – Complete and Unabridged © HarperCollins Publishers 1991, 1994, 1998, 2000, 2003

ThesaurusLegend:  Synonyms Related Words Antonyms

Adj.

1.

arrogant - having or showing feelings of unwarranted importance out of overbearing pride; "an arrogant official"; "arrogant claims"; "chesty as a peacock" self-important, chesty proud - feeling self-respect or pleasure in something by which you measure your self-worth; or being a reason for pride; "proud parents"; "proud of his accomplishments"; "a proud moment"; "proud to serve his country"; "a proud name"; "proud princes"

Based on WordNet 3.0, Farlex clipart collection. © 2003-2012 Princeton University, Farlex Inc.

 

Playing with the word arrogant: 

are a giant...bigger than...better than...are O cant...arrow cant...as the arrow cant point in that direction as being firmly stubborn about something which is to hold onto the point of division and separation as a result of not letting the arrow point to equality and oneness as the whole point which encompasses all the angles and particular views as which is best for all...while arrogance is holding onto a particularly view point which is in friction/polarity judgement within myself as like an internal war that is based upon divide and conquer and therefore separation is accepted and allowed within the individual through lack of self acceptance as all as one as equal which results in over compensating self worth because of accepting and allowing a low self worth.

Arrogance: 

is a result of accepting and allowing self judgement as low self worth and over compensating by portraying the image and impression of importance and superiority...it’s like wanting to be recognised and noticed in order to feel a sense of self sufficiency, self adequacy because of the accepted allowed inferiority judgement held in regards towards self. This therefore is the result of an internal war between inferiority and superiority because the arrow can’t point to equality and oneness because of the accepted and allowed friction and energy fluctuation from accepting and allowing the divide and conquer point of inferiority versus superiority.