Day 126 Courage and Honor in Facing Brutality

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having suppressed and avoided facing the brutality of myself as what I have accepted and allowed within myself throughout time with the courage and honour to execute self correction as a form of self perfection as like the self realisation that I will myself as form by purifying myself as self perfection.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having justified myself as self suppression as a result of feeling uncomfortable when staring the brutality of me as my acceptances and allowances as separation.

I forgive myself for having avoided the hard work as self willed self discipline in slowly but surely moving through the accepted and allowed brutality within myself as like the polarity friction as accepted and allowed manifested friction.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having just buried the brutality of me with positive thinking and a positive attitude that like it’s all good man like ya I just forgot about the shit I buried because I don’t want to take self responsibility for the brutal nature I have accepted and allowed because its like so fucking brutal and admitting my own brutality takes courages and honor because it’s a fucking brutal task/work/process.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being defensive within myself as like an outflow as consequence to accepting and allowing a self righteous addiction as like an automated way within myself to hide from the truth of myself as like the brutal nature I have accepted and allowed and become as consequence of manifested acceptances and allowances.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having fueled the brutality within myself and the world as like trying to cover up the brutality that has manifested here as exstensive abuse because facing myself as an abuser is fucking brutal as like realising myself as the lowest low and to know that I fueled the highest highs within myself from holding onto and compounding the lowest lows.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having used drugs as like a temporary crutch as like a medication to regulate myself into a state of perception of like it’s all good man everything is awesome and lets just focus on the positive because the negative is the truth of ourselves and its brutal and it’s like a buzz killer and I wanted to create the highest buzz like a buzz so high that I am never not high.

I forgive myself for not realising the extent to which I was compromising myself by focusing on living and becoming the highest highs like placing myself above everyone where I sit atop my throne and look down upon everyone from my seat of total self righteousness based in separation of myself as all as one as equal.

I forgive myself for not realising how strong I built up my guard as defense systems as to defend myself righteousness always because I realise I could manipulate myself in such a way that I could always derive a buzz from my actions by operating on guard as like an automated defense system to protect myself righteous indignation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having fallen so many times within and as self righteous indignation as like saying fuck you to myself as all as one as equal.

I realise I am slowly but surely bit by bit working through the brutality of me as consequence as like the manifested friction within me as like absolute abuse and disregard for myself as life as an equal and one creator responsible for my actions and the results of my actions.

I realise that as a result of having fallen so many times in so many different ways I have the opportunity to be a teacher to many by sharing my stories of consequence with the practical solutions to alleviate and avoid manifested consequences as accepting and allowing separation within myself as polarity friction as like highs and lows as feelings and emotions that were created from a spectrum of self appointed values in separation of myself by having been ignorant of myself as all as one as equal as being It here the source as the root of all evil.

When and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself to be flooded with emotions or feelings as like manifested consequences which are being shown to me in a moment as the result of my suppressions as the brutality I have buried within myself, I stop and breath...and I realise I am the courage and honor in facing the brutality of me with patience as like self determination in breath to allow myself to breathe myself out as like a grounding myself as like to realease the built up energies within my body that have compounded as like stress as like anger and irritation as consequence to accepting and allowing myself for having buried the brutality of myself.