Day 777 - The Ink in my Thinking as Personified Television - Channel Surfing (2)

I've come to notice that my everyday movement within actually doing things is tainted to an extent with the amount of time i spend within my mind thinking about things.  It's not that I don't do anything, it's that I've come to recognize that I would like to stop needlessly flipping the channels.

What I mean by 'flipping the channels', is just kind of going down the rabbit hole in thought....where it's like you can go on endlessly man.

Also, I really enjoy physical activity, and channel surfing....moving in the mind is like as far away as it gets from Legit physical activty..  I mean moving in the mind is connected to physical activity, because the body and mind are connected, but it's more of a reactionary response.

What is the experience of flipping channels...moving through thoughts?

Looking for more.

Why does this happen?

The more attention/energy you give to it, the more you create your own momentum....a sort of mind momentum.

How do I stop myself from the momentum of my mind movement and addiction to channel surfing?

-One breath at a time.
-The breath is the best way to slow oneself down and stop mind/energetic movement within the body.
-Self-forgiveness is a tried tested and true tool that works in the deconstruction of the specifics of layered physical body mind energy constructions.
-It's all about our words
-Purifying our vocabulary, (cleaning the pollution out of the water that exists within ourselves as our memories....as water is the holder of sound....and when our words are glossed in various shades of energetic coating, as like degrees of separation and disconnection from the source of ourselves as all life here...we are marginalizing our effectiveness within our everyday lives.)
-Fine tuning and specifying our Living Words.
-The Who/How/What am I Doing Here Questions to support Directions as our practical living Words as our Instructions and Expressions.


It's comical to actually look and not do what it is you would like to do.  You know, to keep looking at what it is you would like and not do it.   Like to obsessively look without really checking out the points of interest for real, as like to actually move within the points to actually make a further deduction, experiment, discovery. Our creation potential is within and as our ability to look and do....to play and work with what is here....it's like our looking is the way in which we read information....and our action is a reflection of how we put our information into application.

Whether we like it or not...which is a form of irony in and of itself.....we are all great composers....Life is a musical of sorts and we are always composing shit.  Shit gets complicated when when we misinform ourselves about our shit....like for instance, being deceptive about the quality of our Information....the integrity of our Relationships here. And to look at the matters simply here, Is simply a matter of Word Regard...and Everyone coming to terms...So all Our Information here is a balanced Sound Equation rooted in common Sense...you know,.....kind of like a piano, in that each sound/key is specifically what it is.  A sound structured alignment.  In-Tune.

Day 776 - The Ink in my Thinking as Personified Television

 



Thinking is something i have given much credence to.  I have placed so much value in thinking that it has been to my own detriment.  I'd like to make a distinction here between 'thinking' and 'looking', where thinking is a sort of random behavior without direction that we give attention to as like thoughts, things just pop up within our mind and as we give attention to it our mind continues to move and build momentum and increase it's activity production output as going deeper and deeper.  Where as 'Looking' is a self directed point of seeing into something that will often stem from a form of questioning. the question may be direct or indirectly asked within oneself as a sort of examination like process within getting to know/investigate a particular point.

For myself, i can see i have very much allowed myself to blur the lines between self-directed 'looking' and 'thinking'....where the looking and the thinking can be very much regarded as the same thing....but also within the mix is the random reactionary thought that i have gotten into the patterned habit of examining, where it's like I stop what i am solely focused on and begin a sort of juggling act by giving a certain amount of attention to this 'new thought application'.  This 'thought application' is like a random virus in the sense that my connection to it is emotional/feeling based where it typical starts off with a very small charge/pulse about it....and i form a specific impression as a 'new thought/feeling-emotion/action-reaction' and from there do a sort of spiral inward into layering the point, where it's like a sort of zap/zing suppression that is kind of like lightening in a bottle in that it is is so intense yet small yet quick, yet powerful.

Fortunately I have the tools to sort out....self-correct such conditioned behavior.

Why would I want to correct such behavior / application within myself?
What's the point?

The point is Specificity and Accountability.  Meaning, to live and create the best version of myself here.

To elaborate,  My expression and ability to perform tasks to the best of my abilities is tainted within allowing myself to be very much 'distracted/possessed' within my own Thinking.

I have seen first hand how much my mobility is limited/halted within allowing myself to drift/wander/watch my thoughts brew about a particular topic.  For example, In tree planting...a job i have done for many years, my ability to move/flow with effortless efficiency is in direct correlation with presence/thoughtlessness of the moment, where i am so committed to my physical movement and am just so here within the expression of me moving, that there is no room for any other activity, nor need.   However...sometimes i would allow myself to be preoccupied with points of thought/ideas while moving/tree-planting...and the longer i allowed myself to focus on the thinking while moving/working, the more my performance suffered as tree-planting effortless efficiency, meaning my ability to plant a tree quickly slowed down...sometimes this slowing down in movement was only a fraction of a second, and sometimes it was more.  Ironically, I was typically more exhausted at the end of a tree-planting day when i had planted fewer trees and thought more.


To be Continued

Day 775 - In Fear You're It

 




Inferiority - In fear you are it. You are it in fear. Inferior I tied to the why of the fear I fear. Inferior it is why. A less than experience and acceptance and allowance.  Often masked and projected externally as superiority.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize how I have existed as the Inferiority character construction within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not even believe it possible that I could exist within and as the point of Inferiority.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear my very own inferiority.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hide and deny acknowledging points/moments/reactions within and as Inferiority.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to regard inferiority as such a bad thing, like one of the worst things a person could be.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for thinking that inferiority is a choice and a decision so much so and that if you are ever faced within and as the point of inferiority, you should hide it by presenting a false front, lie and deny it, as a way to not accept it within yourself.  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realizes how I created coping defense mechanisms within my mind as ways to 'survive' within and as the moments of inferiority. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing how recognition of moments of inferiority is a great point of strength in seeing how and where you are not measuring up to par within and as a point/application/ability.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having made inferiority a perpetuated weakness within myself, by being afraid to admit points of inadequacy within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to regard inferiority as wrong.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting to understand and really know inferiority.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating a preference towards hiding from my inferiority within and as the outward projection of superiority.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to compound the existence of inferiority within myself as a result of believing myself to be high, mighty and powerful within the character reaction of superiority.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create abuse within myself internally and externally as a result of fearing to face myself within the full spectrum of polarized characterizations.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing how I constructed a primary character throughout my life as Inferiority who reacts in fear and projects superiority as a coverup job and operation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to live a lie as my very own self-deception and self-manipulation as the reactionary inferiority character that created and energetic addiction towards channeling a high and might experience within myself as my energetic release for the built of layers of shit that I would compound within myself as my mind activity here in defense and conflict with myself and world as everyone here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing the extent and scope to which I created clever coping mechanisms to induce a positive energy high experience and escape for myself as a result of fearing to get real with myself and acknowledge/face/know/understand my weakness as Inferiority and Inadequacy.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to associate vulnerability and sensitivity to being undesirable forms of weakness connected to inferiority and that it is my choice to disregard and deny the reality of these words.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to construct myself in and as inferiority.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for suppressing my potential as a result of fearing to get real.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be on the run from myself...as like constantly being on the move within fear as my accepted and allowed mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating all sort of beautiful words and ideas and concepts as various ways of my word patterned communications to perpetuate a false front....a false flag operation..a lie, a veil, a misrepresentation of the actuality of what I am accepting and allowing within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have thought that is what you are suppose to do with points of inferiority and any other sort of weakness that comes up within one's mind and body experience here...as to make something up that you like better.  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realizing and understanding how to substantiate my vocabulary effectively as a structurally sound foundation within myself, as the words existing within me here in and as equality and oneness, from the perspective that words are innocent and do not require me to make up charges held against the words as them being polarized within the scope of positive, neutral and negative energies.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to support a world of impotence, as a sort of powerlessness that is governed and controlled, ruled through and as my accepted and allowed fear...a sort of self-inflicted spitefulness as the lack of understanding of what Inferiority in fact means.

I forgive myself for not realizing and understanding the sense of irony existed within and as word and world relationships here, within and as our oneness and equality, as that is the one point always here...our oneness and equality...and the irony of course is within and as our self-definition as how we imprison our very cells here at a resonant level as the scope of the entirety of ourselves as all of existence within and as our sound.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that my potential to exist here as sound, has been suppressed, that I have been existing here within and as a sort of noise, a derivative of sound, a less than experience...the epitome of inferiority...rooted in and as self-abuse, being in conflict with myself and not even realizing how I am in fact perpetuating and prolonging a war within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize the propaganda I would create in and as various forms of reaction/fear of myself being here within and as a point of reaction....where I would then create a disinformation agenda to quickly move into another character to hide the scope of the truth of myself, which has been the very initial reaction/fear within myself, as fear it self.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear fear itself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create a battle/conflict of epic proportions with Fear...believing Fear to be the ultimate enemy and point of separation that I must fight against as the very quick moving reactionary defense systems within my mind.  I forgive myself for not realizing and understanding how extensively I have been on the attack and the defense at the same time...the complete reflection of and as the military war machine here in all ways, penetrating the totality of my existence here.


When and as I see myself reacting in Inferiority/inadequacy, I stop and breathe, I take a moment to correctly identify the specifics of my reactionary defense/weakness.  I realize this is a weakness that requires specific self-correction because it is being revealed to me in my mind as a form of military defense and offense upon myself and all of existence here.  I realize it is my self-responsibility to come to terms within myself as a removing myself from the field of battle, where I release myself from participation within and as the enemy construct here. I see, realize and understand the solution of myself here at peace with all of existence as a point of agreement within and as my word relationships here, where I in fact am at ease with my word and world relationships here, where I mean no offense or defense.  I commit myself to the process of settling the terms of negotiation within myself as the vocabulary that exists within myself as a form of energetic dissonance.  I realize and understand the process of self-transformation as the self-direction of my existence within and as energetic information, to that of physical sound substance here as the physical universe here.  I realize, understand, and know the process of status correction here to be a labored physical process of nurturing myself back together again, from disharmony and disease to harmony here as the sound of music at ease.  I realize the substance of self-expression here is in fact our sound.  I commit myself to birthing myself as sound/life here.

Day 774 - I am a Blogger and Vlogger

 


I am a Blogger.

I am a Vlogger.

I blog and vlog as a point of support.

Support for myself and others in the world.

The starting point in blogging and vlogging is also a track record and statement of my process/progress in taking self-responsibility.

I see realize and understand the process of taking self-responsibility to be quite the process indeed.

Self-forgiveness is an integral part of my process of self-realization and self-responsibility here.



I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having to an extent not really substantiated the point within myself here as, "I am a blogger and I am a Vlogger."

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resist totally owning the point of Yes, I am a Blogger, and Yes, I am a Vlogger.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to neglect the value I see within process Blogging and Vlogging.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself  to have hidden a suppression within myself about being a blogger and a vlogger, as like not something I would want to admit to anyone, as like a point that I accepted and allowed to be a sort of weakness...weakness from the perspective of my accepted and allowed relationship within the point and the self-judgement and fear in relationship to others as the thinking that maybe i won't have the words to explain myself or that my words might be misconstrued.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to resist owning the expression and living of myself as a Blogger and Vlogger, as these points being integral to the lifestyle in which is me here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I feared to express myself to anyone and everyone as a blogger and vlogger, to have a willingness and openness to discuss and share. And within this, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear criticism, conflict, and ridicule.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having been very fearful about opening myself up to others in my world to tell them about myself as a blogger and vlogger, where i would rather a person for the most part discover my blog or vlog as a result of them searching for something specific that i happened to write about.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for rationalizing fears within my mind as reasoned justifications as to why I cannot have complete transparency about myself being a Blogger and Vlogger.  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize and understand how I have self-righteously fogged my clarity at times within a sort of realm of superiority like thought that has been perpetuated within my very own accepted and allowed inferiority and accepted and allowed self-judgement and inadequacy.  I realize and understand the ridiculousness within and as the sort of web of lies I have told myself to perpetuate peculiar points of dissonance/fear within myself.

When and as I see myself fearing to share who I am, I stop and breathe, I look at the point I am in fear about, I stand within in it, I allow myself to face it and transcend it in the moment, by in fact stopping myself to run away in reaction on a point of energy that comes up within me in a moment as the fear construction and suppression point.  I commit myself to trusting in my best judgement and discernment in my moment to moment communications.  I commit myself to slowing down within myself, to stop the tendency to run and hide within fear based behavior patterns where my speech/words become rushed and less than my best potential and expression and sharing of who I really am.

I commit myself to Blogging for life as a lifestyle point of who and how I am within the world here.

I commit myself to Vlogging as point just like Blogging.

I commit myself to sharing my process journey to life here within and as Blogging and Vlogging

I commit myself to reinvigorating my passion for Blogging and Vlogging.

Day 773 - DOUBT

 

DOUBT:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the extent to which I have dis-empowered myself within and as a result of holding onto an energetic 'doubt' within myself, ...as the 'damned if I do and damned if i don't experience'....perpetuating a sort of stagnation, see sawing back and forth within myself...thinking maybe this way is best, maybe this way is best...a sort of stressful restlessness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the irony within holding onto an energetic doubt within myself....is that what results is a whole lot of nothing...but a lot of humming and hawing...as like maaaaaaaybe......a lot of wasted time and energy into thinking about things, but never really actually doing anything. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear making a wrong decision to such an extent that I would rather avoid making a decision all together. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not recognizing the the ridiculousness of this behavior.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing my existence to be a sort of doubt filled dwelling. As like just thinking of the possibilities without ever really pushing myself to act swiftly and promptly within and as my decision making process.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize and understand the time wasted within and as the fear of making a bad decision...like by deliberately allowing more and more time to think about it.....that the point in question could in fact have been faced by making a decision one way or the other way....but by allowing such postponement on decision making, just allows one's life to compound in limbo....like a sort of state of purgatory....where it's like being fucked on both sides...as like being mind fucked out of the potential good and bad consequence of the situation. A great travesty/deception really.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the travesty and deception of allowing doubt to linger as a reason for indecision and postponement on decision making.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be cowardly in my thoughts/words/deeds as a result of resisting to take self-responsibility for the doubt inside myself.

When and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself to wait on making a decision, I stop and look at why this is in fact what I am doing. I self-honestly assess what is holding me back. I realize that in some instances there is much accounting to do before making a decision on particular matters. I realize it's not to push a polarized self-sabotage by superimposing that one must always be quick on decisions. I realize it's a point of practicality within and as the decision making process here. I realize it is a matter of being self-honest about the points that are here within myself...as this is the real accounting here....See the accounting here is the specifics of and as my word recognition's....because each word of consideration as like the main points is a sort of conglomeration of relationships being put together within myself...and so a key starting point is to write all the words down so to get clarity on the specifics of the accounting.

When and as I see myself wanting to postpone looking at things/decisions here, I stop and breathe, I make note of the specifics that i am deliberately looking to postpone/avoid. I recognize these points as the key points of the matter here...as the main points that need to be accounted for...as like there is some balancing required here...because these points...which can be represented by specific word relationships are out of alignment as how I am existing in relationship to them. So what is cool here, is that sorting myself out is a matter of vocabulary. Word recognition is the key to being effective in and as the world here. I realize there's no valid reason to take my acceptances and allowances personally from the perspective of punishing myself for what i have realized, but to actually move one.....'moving on' is key here...as the taking of self-responsibility in restructuring my life word/world relationships in ways that are best for all life. I realize in identifying the problem/issue, I in fact empower myself within and as self-responsibility to create/direct/develop a solution.

I commit myself to being bold in facing my accepted and allowed doubt.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for using doubt as an excuse and justification for non participation within my world.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to abdicate self-responsibilities within and as the acceptance and allowance of self-doubt as a reason and excuse to justify accepting and allowing inferiority within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting to look and see how in fact the ego of superiority is glossed within and as the doubt of inferiority.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the correlation between doubt, ego, and blame as like a trinity of fuckedness as different angled ways in which one can create a mind fucked prison for oneself. I realize that there is other key words in which I have fucked myself in perpetuating a sort of doubtful existence, like justification, reasoning, logic, manipulation, self-sabotage....I realize that in a lot of ways, I exhibited a lot of ways to remain stuck within the core point here...and that being a real lack of self-independence and self-trust as the care taker and authority of me here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize how I have in fact forgot about living my life in so many instances as a result of accepting and allowing myself to exist as the very fear which permeates a doubt filled mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how a doubt filled mind is one of such fear, though ironically the fear of massive amounts of inferiority is so deeply hidden behind the surface layer of bullshit which is known and regarded as the positive back chat of super ego superiority where one asserts one's self-righteousness without actually really doing anything but scaring/separating the shit out of oneself, and ultimately missing out on a lot of awesome potential moments of shared enjoyment here. I realize and understand the isolation within and as the ego superiority of self-doubt. I realize the ridiculousness of perpetuating such an extensive bullshit story.

I realize that keeping the fearful doubt experience alive within myself is like deliberately trying to waste myself away here. I commit myself to stop wasting myself away.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to invalidate myself to such an extent that I am searching and seeking for validation, and direction as some sort of answer as to what i should do....and ironically within all this, i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize and understand my self-authority, myself actualization, myself realization here, myself-honesty, myself-trust, myself-responsibility here...myself as the creator of myself here.

Day 772 - Life is a StandUp Comedy

 



It's funny you know, when you really get something, like you totally got it. I mean it's that moment of aha that can turn into a real hahahaha ohhh man that's funny, that's rich, that's just so great. pure gold. So money.

See, our lives are like an ever evolving learning process of self-expansion and recognition here, and we are all ways the butt of the joke. I mean we are the source of it all. We are in the house of mirrors and everything exists within ourselves and is mirrored outward as our external reality.

It's interesting to see, when we go for prolonged amounts of time without any relief... I mean, like, just perpetuating a build up of our own self-induced stress that we blame and judge and really believe it's all out there, outside of ourselves. So in a lot of ways, this is not so funny...and that is precisely the point....the knot in the funny....the knot in the fun, because we are too tightly wound, taking ourselves way too seriously, not recognizing the jokes, the points, the learning lessons, the mistakes, the problems and the solutions.

See, it's interesting; Self-honesty through accepting and allowing ourselves to be vulnerable with ourselves here,...our self-in-to-me-I-see...our self-intimacy, the taking the time to look, to care, to in fact recognize the bits of things that are happening within ourselves here.

See, these 'bits' are the jokes....and it's interesting, because everybody has so many bits here, I mean, we are always working with bits of information, and so much so it's in these moments of working with information...and there's a plethora of ways in which this is so...the amounts of varying relationship dynamics is tremendous.  The jokes, the fun, the funny, is the balancing act of not taking ourselves too seriously within and as the work we are engaged within, because we are at work all the time so to speak...our very design is as a working body here,  i mean our body doesnt take a vacation every few days,.., it's an all the time thing.

So, in having some laughs while we work, while we share, while we converse, while we play, we allow ourselves to learn and grow...we are creating a natural learning environment for ourselves within ourselves by allowing ourselves to recognize our accepted and allowed moments of ridiculousness. I mean wow, if we really have a look...it's like so often we are missing out on the fun and the funny because we are not being self-honest with ourselves here. Faking to be cool when in fact that isn't really cool.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to play it cool when shit is not all cool.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating a too prolonged build up within myself without getting to the punch line, the joke recognition, seeing the ridiculousness that i have accepted and allowed.

I realize it's kind of funny to exist as a living joke and to within and as the joke, forget that,.. Tag, I am It.  Like, oh shit, I totally forgot what the fuck i was doing.....what i have been doing....oh man...fuck.  Looking back at my set, as my acceptances and allowances that are ridiculously unacceptable it's like wow talk about bombing. Wait no, don't say bomb if you are being recorded....oh shit is this blog being recorded....lolol.  But seriously, butt butt butt...we are the shit....the whole spectrum of it, it's like we got a giant ball of shit here, the planet and it's a matter of shit management, i mean shit, take a regard of the fact that if you don't move the shit through your body on a regular basis, you are going to fucking die,...maybe through explosion, maybe not.  Point being here, is that I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to forget that I am always working and playing with a bit of some sorts, because that's the standup comedy life process here.

I realize it isn't to say, we must deliberate be fuckup's in order to be funny and have fun....no that would be dumb. Everyone is already a fuckup, Obviously myself included.  It's to self-honestly allow ourselves to recognize our weakness and to turn them into strengths, and to allow ourselves to play with these points of self-development.  Allowing ourselves to be cool in walking a point of weakness into a strength. Allowing ourselves to enjoy the journey/ride/adventure within and as our natural learning abilities here.

It's funny,

When we allow ourselves to be too hard on ourselves,

It's like we are deliberately creating a Hard-On within our minds,

You know,

A throbbing erection to mind fuck the shit out of ourselves with...

and it's like,

every time we allow ourselves to be hard on ourselves about something, it's like we are creating a new big dick inside ourselves,

as another big dick example to fuck ourselves with.

Excuse my Dick humor here,

I'm just dicking around.

Because you know,

it's kind of funny,

I mean realizing the extent to which we fuck ourselves is tragic,

Tragic comedy,

A divine comedy if you will,

because there is so much learning in store,

I mean we are all such a wealth of storage...

and it just so happens that sharing our realizations has the capacity to be both fun and funny.


I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold back on showing myself the funny here, as the moments/points of ridiculousness that I have accepted and allowed.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to forget to look at the ridiculousness of myself within my acceptances and allowances as the source of funny.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to suppress the fun and funny I have within myself that is at the core of my being here.  I realize and understand that the fun and the funny are here for everyone, we are all a part of it, and it is in fact best shared as like we are each the story teller, and what's cool about a good story is the fun and the funny along the way.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting to take it easy within recognizing difficult things I have accepted and allowed.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for choosing to create a fearful frame of mind when I am faced with points that are challenging.  I realize that is ridiculousness, because going into a fearful mind state when things are difficult and unfamiliar, does not really assist and support oneself to move with a sort of effortless ease as the presentation of our in fact developed response abilities as the ways in which we are skilled and versed in movement.

I commit myself to sharing my process of life standup comedy.

I commit myself to encouraging others to share their life process of standup comedy.

I commit myself to share points of relationship that are easily relate-able, so that the fun and funny can be had by all.

I commit myself to educating through sharing stories/jokes of trials and tribulations.

I commit myself educating myself about others by being interested in listening to their stories of trials and tribulations.

I commit myself to being open minded.

When and as I see myself having difficulty communicating with someone, I stop and breathe, I have a giggle as I recognize I have been fucking myself unintentionally....which is pretty ridiculous....i mean to fuck yourself and not realize how you are fucking yourself is pretty fucking questionable...I mean what the fuck is going on!  SO, I recognize the specifics of the mind fuck, and I forgive myself and correct the discrepancy within myself as the point of conflict/friction/blockage that i had been brewing/building within myself.  I let it go.  I open up my ability to relate here. I see for real what is here,  I allow myself to return into and as Flow Here, by being completely open and at ease within myself here.


I commit myself to being a pillar of support in communicating with others.

I commit myself to gratitude within and as the process sharing of words here.

I commit myself to many daily word exchanges.

I commit myself to treasuring each and every word exchange.

I realize word exchanges are kind of like the stock exchanges...because words are instruments here of tremendous value.

I commit myself to cherishing my words and the words of others.

I commit myself to see the assistance and support in words always all ways.

Day 771 - The Sloooooooooow Down Secret

"Slow down, so you can see more of what is here"

Hanging out with family and friends is a great opportunity to test yourself.  The emotional feedback you get from family and friends will in most instances be stronger than that of strangers. Note: by emotional feedback, i am specifically referring to the reactions that come up in our own mind, as like what gets to us in one way or another where we are triggered.

When you allow yourself to slow down enough to specifically identify the reactions/triggers that come up in the mind, there is great potential to change the relationship dynamics in the moment, a real time change. What is interesting here is that it is a matter of self-recognition as our mirrored self-reflection here within and as our word and world.  See, traditionally within and as points of mind ego, We are reacting to the information we see.....what is interesting about this, is that we are in fact so close to the point of self-correction......self-identifying our own bullshit here.  See, in seeing bullshit about another, so much so, this bullshit that is getting to us, is a reflection of our own bullshit we are hiding from.

So,  in recognizing what points cause stimulation within ourselves...as like a sort of emotional or feeling reaction, where we are desiring to act out our release.....like we just got to say or do something....like, we are possessed to do so....the experience of we just got to do it.

Now in some instances, we can see and recognize the experience within ourselves and we stop our selves from playing out the bullshit, but we leave it there.  This is a cool starting point...the stopping the play out of the reaction...BUT, it is cool to keep on with the slow down approach and actually go into the specifics of the self-recognition here....the particulars of the vocabulary/points that are a bothersome/burden/stress/conflict.

See, in slowing down enough to look at the scope of the relationship dynamics of a situation, one's whole world changes....because it's like going from a tunnel vision perspective to a holistic perspective. Reconnecting, Remembering a piece of ourselves here.

A practical support point in looking at things is this:  Identify a point of friction, specifically see the judgement that comes up as a particular word or words dictating/defining a frame of mind.  In seeing our shit come up within ourselves...we can in the moment forgive ourselves, and so Learn the point in real time...because what opens up when we self-forgive a point of accepted and allowed separation, is that we realize and see things that have always been here that we just couldn't/didn't/wouldn't/weren't getting to See here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for holding onto judgments that come up within my mind within social situations that keep me in a state of possession and limit my ability to be sensitive and receptive to others in a way that is complimentary and gentle as the best support here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to speak bullshit as a result of speaking form the starting point of feeling/emotion possession.

I forgive myself for not realizing and understanding how my own thinking is what perpetuates conflict in my world, because my thoughts present to me my accepted and allowed thought patterns..., the specifics of what i have built up over time within my body as the emotions and feelings i have formed impressions about in my body as the specifics of the self-definition picture frame of mind.   I realize and understand the self-corrective process in taking the time to see the High definition picture formation relationships i have constructed within my world through various lenses of ego superiority/inferiority relationship acceptances and allowances.  I commit myself to equalizing myself with all Life here, by purifying my thoughts/words/deeds.  I commit myself to self-forgiving and self-correcting points of ego that come up within my mind.  I realize my mind and environment are fantastic support structures here.  I commit myself to utilizing all the support and assistance I have here to in fact develop and create the best version of myself here.

I forgive myself for not realizing and understanding how I miss the humor of my own accepted and allowed ridiculous, my mistakes, when and as i resist slowing down to look at things for real, and in fact, take my time here.  I realize the irony of not taking my time, is that fact that i do not have any time, that my life has no substance.  Ironically, i see how it is an individual self-responsibility to make time for ourselves here. I see and realize our time as a shared commodity/privilege/potential here.  I realize our creation potential and learning capacity is within making time here, because it is within slowing down and taking the time to look and see, that we can actually recognize what is here, what is going on, and how best to contribute to the world here.

I realize that, in taking the time to investigate the specifics/particulars of our word/world relationships here,..., the more we do so, the more we have to share/give.  Ironically, we have more to share when we take the time to look and see what we got to give...and within this, it is quite fascinating to see how awesome it is to share something we really worked on make real here.  This is a fascinating realization of our self-development here, because it is taking the time to develop the particular dynamics of ourselves here, the more easily we can relate and share the best possible support with others here.  I mean, giving the best gifts, is fucking awesome, nobody wants a terrible gift. so it's a  matter of taking our time, slowing down to see for real.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the extent to which i have skewed my ability to see for real here in every moment.  I realize that my perception is skewed when i allow my point of view to be tainted within and as the energy of reactionary thought.  I realize and understand how the moment of  reactionary thought can be a sort of tipping point to getting to the point of focus and clarity within and as myself here.  I see and realize the focal pivot point of the energy of thought, a stepping stone of support in identifying the specifics of a personal weakness that is here in and as opportunity to become a real strength of my character/expression in Life here.  I commit myself to the identification process of the specifics of the energy movements that come up within me as thought.  I commit myself to utilizing all my thoughts as tools of support in strengthening my vision here in seeing the world with real eyes here, without filters as particular energetic biases that are self-destructive.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize the self-destruction within and as Ego.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting to let go of ego.

I forgive myself for not realizing the irony within resisting to let go of ego, the fact and point of Slowing Down,..taking the time to see what I am doing here.

I commit myself to slowing down and looking at what I am doing here.

I commit myself to seeing what I am accepting and allowing here.

I commit myself to taking the time to learn from what I see here.

I commit myself to taking the time to relate to everything here.

I commit myself to listening to everything here.

I commit myself to sharing the best of myself here.

I commit myself to taking the time to create the best of myself here.

I commit myself to living the slow down realization of creation here as a point of slowing down in order to move more quickly as the self-direction of myself here in all ways.

I commit myself to slowing down and taking my time with family and friends,  I realize reactions are an indicator of being insensitive to slowing down and seeing family/friends as me here in another life.  I commit myself to facing the truth of myself in my participation's with family and friends.

I commit myself to sharing the results of my realizations within slowing down and taking the time to look at things for real.  I commit myself to letting my sharing of my realizations come through as part of my living expressions here.