Day 628 Conceited

It's Fun Funny and Cool to play with the sounding of words to see what is sometimes missed within and as the actuality of what is here in and as a word relationship as how the letters come together in producing a structured sound expression.

I'm looking at the word "Conceited" Because this is a self-defensive word I have utilized as a tool to propagate the religion of myself as being Superior in competition/comparison/judgement to others. Interestingly enough, this reveals low/inflated self-worth. I believed that it was necessary to sell/promote my self-proclaimed greatness as a way to in fact achieve self-proclaimed greatness. Motivated within and as the desire to be be famous and regarded as Royalty in Superiority, I presented my beliefs/opinions whole heartily, triggering others to fuel my proclamations and stand with my behaviour/programming/words as a result of having the very same desires existent within themselves, however, not necessarily actively engaging desire to the extent in which I have been advocating/living.

CON-SEATED !!!

Notice also how the word "Cite" and "Cited" exists within and as the word "Conceited" and how the spelling of "Cited" is rearranged to spell "Ceited"...as "Con + Ceited = ConSeated"

It's Funny to see the actual play out of Conceited behaviour because it's like trying to encourage a hypnotic trance into getting what you want...Like instead of Asking for what it is that You would Like to Receive, there is this belief that if I deceive and I believe in what is is I am deceiving about...I will Achieve the result I am seeking without being direct in my asking for it...interestingly enough this behaviour is like a "beating around the bush" type of mentality that is the direct result of self-manipulation as a result of the accepted and allowed Fear of Inferiority.

OK, Let's look at a very specific example here:

"Let me tell You how great I am. I am the Best at Everything. Everything I do, I am so good at...I have accomplished this and this and that and this...and let me go on and on about all the things I am capable of...Also that I am not not afraid of this and this and this...which is actually quite impressively and truly remarkable because pretty much everyone is afraid and I am not...I am actually so much better than You..."

OK, the point of my example here is to illustrate the specific nature of "Conceitedness", where a specific desire exists to be regarded/perceived/judged/worshiped/proclaimed/complimented in a particular manner...as like to specifically tell someone what it is You want to hear. I find this really funny, because the ridiculous absurdity of it is not heard at all within the speaker...as like there is a cognitive dissonance towards the joke/funny being parlayed here because of the serious nature of the speaker...as like the roots of the situation are seriously fucked...as Fear...is like fucking our Ears ability to Hear...and so, Fear, is like the price/FARE we pay/speak without realizing and understanding the seriousness and severity of and as our own current situation/problem...and thus we miss the Joke that we are, which in truth is Soooooooo Ridiculously Absurd that it is Funny. Albeit and Arguably So, the truth of Our-self is the Most Unfortunate Tragic Comedy Existence as a Whole has in fact ever Witnessed. Ironically enough, Seeing that our finger pointing judgement/comparison/competition has all been in vain, as the reality of the situation is that we've really just been finger blasting our own Asshole as we did not realize and understand our Equality and Oneness and therefore consequently became the manifestation of and as total fucking assholes here...Not realizing how we've proliferated the belief in our own BULLSHIT by finger fucking our own asshole within our self-judgement/comparison/competition believed and propagated inferiority/superiority complex conditioning behaviour mentality frame of mind.


To Be Continued

Day 602 Conflict of Interest

I find the point of "conflict of interest" to be a ridiculously absurd scenario that is far too regularized within society.

Here is why:

I see that "Interesting" comes from Interest and so I relate the point of "conflict of interest" to that of "Conflict of Stimulation"...Meaning that it is Obviously All about being Stimulated....and being Stimulated particularly in the right way...you know the right kind of stimulation....which is an interesting thing within and of itself, because getting rubbed the wrong way is stimulation too.

So, 

I notice, "Conflict of Interest" to be about unfavorable masturbation....I mean getting rubbed the wrong way.

What the fuck is unfavorable masturbation?

Unfavorable masturbation I see as having 2 main outflows:

1)Mental masturbation: getting worked-up/stimulated emotionally about something. To put it bluntly, being triggered and reacting to some dumb ass bull shit

The irony is that all forms of mental masturbation are self induced. And being triggered by some sophisticated clever intellectual shit is one and the same as reacting to some dumb as bull shit.

I see that this is a consequence of being addicted to fucking with yourself to such an extent that you believe you can't have the good fucking without the bad fucking.

What a stupid rationalization this is, "You can't have the good without the bad".  This induces the mentality that you must be bi-polar. Like, in a win/loss relationship with yourself. Fighting for peace. Like deliberately giving yourself pain/grief/sorrow/depression/despair as the necessary chemical concoctions believed to be necessary to extract the experiences of ecstasy/pleasure/relief/happiness. 

2) Physical Masturbation triggered by Mental Masturbation: jerking off to porn/desire/fantasy...rubbing one out because you're all worked up.

Now, some of you may be wondering like, 'what the fuck'...how the fuck am I suppose to rub one out...or, 'oh shit, rubbing one out with porn is a conflict of interest'...what the fuck, I don't get it...or maybe something along the lines of, 'you think what I am saying is total bullshit'...and well...fuck...if there's been any reaction to my words...than I've just helped you rub one out...triggering your conflict of interest....how stimulating....

To Be Continued

Day 429 Why You are so Stupid?

This is a continuation to my previous blog entitled, Stupid.

After having written my blog I went through a process of self induced stupid experiences. I had some reactions come up within me as various forms of self-judgment with regards to writing the blog "Stupid".  I was worried and concerned about what others might think of me taking on the topic of stupidity...and also I feared that I was exposing myself as stupid and that what I was doing is kind of stupid and that I'm way off course by bringing up the point of calling people stupid...like to make any sort of inference that it could be actually a nice gesture to call people stupid...is somewhere I shouldn't go.

I see that writing about stupid and my stupid education is a way of facing my own stupidity and breaking down the stupidity barriers as system patterned programming that is stupid.

The fact that I had some reactions about exposing and undressing the point of stupidity reveals to me that this is a point of resistance I am required to push through and transcend all self imposed stupidity.

What brought me to the starting point of writing about stupid was the question about stupid in fact being a practical teaching aid of support...like specifically using the word stupid to assist and support myself and others in seeing points of stupidity as like what the fuck!  What's interesting about doing something stupid is that when you're so immersed within a point of stupidity it's like you're in a trance and snapping out of a moment of stupidity can be difficult at times. I mean, I see that we humans have been educated to be stupid...as like stupid organic robots...functioning off of reactions...like a bunch of chickens with our heads cut off.

I also see the point and practical responsibility for each human to face and self correct our accepted and allowed stupidity. This is obviously quite a process because we've been designed and programmed to be pretty fucking stupid...and therefore realising who and what we are may being experienced in a plethora of stupid ways because the truth stings like a swift kick in the ass.

I see and realise and understand the absurd ridiculousness of  self judgement...and I've been walking a process to stop all forms of self judgement within myself...and as I have explained at the beginning of this post, I was self judging myself about taking on the point of stupidity. What I'm doing is stopping reactions that occur within me and making self corrections about the reactions as the means to prevent myself from going into a stupidity vortex as like being stuck within the out flowed consequence of a reaction...as like losing myself for a moment within a reaction.

So the point came up within me...I realised and understood the stupidity as like absurd ridiculousness...as like a fear mind fuck...and I realised and understood the ridiculousness of stewing within the point. I've come to utilise moments of reaction as a point of cross reference within myself as like an aha moment...as here is a point that I can work with...as like something that hasn't been completely sorted out within myself.  I see and and realise and understand the practical support in utilizing a reaction as a point of resistance that I am required to push...as the means necessary to facilitate my strength training in integrity and accountability as a human being who is removing stupidity bit by bit.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing being regarded as stupid...I realise and understand that fear as a mental fear...is a stupid mind fuck and is totally ridiculous...and that by reacting further to the point of fearing to be regarded as stupid...which is a reaction in itself...as like choosing to compound stupidity/fear within myself. I realise and understand that I am not interested in compounding and perpetuating stupidity/fear within myself...and I realise and understand myself responsibility in facing every single point of stupidity/fear within myself...as I see and realise this to be the necessary process...as the way to actually take care of myself...and give as I like to receive...and expand my potential abilities to make the world as a whole free from stupidity.

When and as I see myself waiting to take action on a point of self correction...as like remedying a point of stupidity, I stop and breathe...I direct myself in letting go of the point of stupidity...I have a chuckle as I realise and understand the absurd ridiculousness of procrastinating on a point of stupidity...as like wow, I see and realise how crazy it is to in any capacity to be like..."oh there's a point that's totally not cool that's existing in me and I am capable and able to direct the point now in a way that's totally awesome...but nah i think I just going to be totally fucking stupid for a little bit long...there's comfort in stupidity...being smart is hard work...stupid is easy..." What the fuck.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for choosing to be stupid in moments as like thinking that stupid is a form of safety avoidance of work and responsibility...as like protecting me as ego...thinking that me as an ego is so smart...as like I am a superior being within my mind as ego...and I am winning the competition against other ego's because I am so stupidly smart.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing to confront stupidity in all capacities.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for ignoring and disregarding stupidity and within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understanding how I was dismissing and ignoring the stupidity that exists within myself and that by ignoring and disregarding the stupidity I see in others...was like an indicator that I am accepting and allowing the same relationship within myself...which is not cool...which is stupid in fact.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realising and understanding how stupid it has been for me to fear my own stupidity..as like I see and realise and understand what a total mind fuck this is.

There's a really good point of fearing My own stupidity that I will begin within in my next blog as an example and illustration which further exposes the absurd ridiculousness of fear...and that creating particular fears is in fact stupid.

Cheers and stay tuned for an example of stupidity that I believed to be totally brilliant.......