I noticed upon waking up this morning i was a bit stiff and rigid. I experienced a tightness and even a bit of a soreness and stiffness within the middle of the small of my lower back....and also a lot more intensively so in my thighs. Yes, my recent physical activities play a role in my physical body self-reflection and investigations.
Ironically, i've noticed that my ability to move within physical activities is so much so rooted in the deep psychology of myself here. Meaning, my words....the vocabulary i speak....and how I say what i say...and the outlook I hold as my insight about the particularities of the relationships within and as the activities i engage within.
What is also very fascinating, is the fact that, I have a whole history of physical impressions layered in me over time on a cellular level as my words imprinted in me since childhood...and in so many ways...what i am realizing and investigating....and working on, is Identifying and correcting my cognitive dissonances. The Interesting thing i have realized is that my cognitive dissonances have manifested in me over time as my reactionary play outs in my movements throughout my days. Meaning, where I would react in a way of Offense or Defense. I noticed I created these offenses and defenses in my behavior conditioning as forms of protection as a result of not really understanding points of conflict/trauma early in my life.
Ive recently started playing with a structured process of Accountability in my, 'thoughts, words, and deeds.' How this Playing works, is:
I wake up in the morning...for my new Today.
I look within my body to see what i am experiencing.
I challenge myself to be Specific with Identifying a Word to explain and summarize the experience of myself.
I go into the specifics of the experience within my body...as how i am physically experiencing myself within particular parts of my body.
From here, I ask myself what word can I gift myself today as a complimentary support for my physical body investigations into the Initial Word I have given Focus to.
From Here, I see how this complimentary word/action exists within me as a physical body experience. I play around for a moment and realizing myself within and as the physical movement of the particular word I have given focus to.
I am now set, in and as my structure for my daily living of word and world investigations. What happens from here, is so much so an adventure and undertaking of unpredictable explanations. Meaning, 'it's like setting the table for a meal...you've prepared the lab for a scientific investigation and exploratory journey into yourself that you are going to walk/run in real time as Today. To further clarify: as a result of giving attention to the first word I bring forth, (example: rigidity)...I get to know and understand myself within and as Rigidity throughout my day...I become aware of my acceptances and allowances as this point of Rigidity on a deep level. Memories come to the surface throughout the day as support in showcasing to me how I substantiated the specifics of my behavior patterns.
I find it supportive to play with both words and get to know myself and even fine tune my definitions as i go with the words I work with in and as my word/world play and participation's from day to day..
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