Day 792 - Royally Fucked

Royally Fucked

“I realize all forms of Inferiority and Superiority are essentially the same thing as points of self-suppression and that it's like Inferiority is less suppression than superiority....where superiority is superior suppression. Funny to see the irony of suppression within Inferiority and Superiority where it's Inferior suppression and Superior Suppression.....like fucked and double fucked.”

“I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having become so used to being royally fucked that I experience myself as uncomfortable in being less than royally fucked. Where being less than royally fucked, feels strange and almost embarrassing and shameful...where i should want to fuck around more so i can get back to being royally fucked. The irony is profoundly fucked lol.”

The Fact that within our world we have the word “Royalty” and “Royal” is an indication of the ingrained Debt Servitude relationship as Inferior and Superior. This is showcased well as the basis of energetic conflict within and as Mind. Polarization. Friction. Battle. War. Slave Mentality.

What do I mean when I say, “Debt Servitude”?

Servicing and Creating Debt. In Service of Debt. Like Debt is the Superior and the Service is Inferior. Where the Debt and the Service need each other to exist...because it's like a point of both being incomplete without the other one...and so each is bound, bonded to the other.

Relation Fucked. Meaning, the basic framework in which relationships are designed is within and as this debt based construction of More than and Less than. Money has become the medium to support the servicing of charges. Energy is another expression and outflow of money. Meaning, Our positive feelings and negative emotions as our relationships to everything here.

Why Relation Fucked?

Relation Fucked, because the basic mode of conditioning, our behaviour within and as mind set up has been, Royally Fucked. Ironically, it is because of our own Accepted and Allowed Royal Acclaim. And our own accepted and allowed Royal Servants. Where each is a manifested representation of ourselves here in all ways and our reaction/impression about it, is like valid confirmation for mind justification in continuing to mine and mind the feeling and emotion about what we see....because what we see is what we are...and it's been going on for so long as the Specificity in Definition Impressions. Where it's like we just layer and layer and layer the Self-Deception. Only, we don't regard our behaviour necessairly as draconian...but more of a sort of human evolution of our greatness...and that our greatness is just very complex and sophisticated like our intelligence...I mean deception. Cough Cough.

Where am I going with this bit, “Royally Fucked”

It's a point of self-reflection for me in and as the world here. Where I am in the process of taking responsibility for all characterizations of myself here. Removing the Separation existent within myself as how I separated myself from all characters here by believing myself to be an individual character that is totally a Separate Setup from all other characters here. See, it's interesting because we have the whole spectrum of characterizations within ourselves...and it's a range of vocabulary and a range of feelings and emotions...just as we have a range of colour here that makes up the spectrum of colour. Point of Investigation is ourselves here as Life.....What is Life...Life is Sound. So in really investigating through words the structure of myself and the world, word by word in a way where I can specifically investigate how I have articulated...made my artistry into the point of ecstasy excretion through perpetually suffering and torture,  making slave labour by keeping my Body and Beingness in a state ingrained debt servitude to my mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize and understand how I created the design and definition of Royalty within my mind.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize and understand how the definition of royalty existent within my body and mind as supported the world as a whole being exactly the way it is.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting to really go into myself to see who and how I am existing within and as my mind as Royalty.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for fearing to face myself as Royally Fucked.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to deny and suppress myself here as Royalty.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for justifying the suppression of myself as Inferior to Royalty because of various phrases such as: “its just the way things are”, “there's just royalty and non royalty”, “our family just isn't the royal one”, “not everyone can be royal”, “Royalty wouldn't exist if everyone was royalty”, “royalty is a necessary position and part of our world and society”.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into conflict with “Royalty” where I would be angry and frustrated with the status of the world, my words, myself here....while most of the time, only projecting my disgust outwards onto others I define as Superior to Me here in this world as for instance the Queen of England and her Royal Family.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame people in this world who are regarded as Royalty for the problems within and as the class system of inequality existent within humanity.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to fight against the world out of frustration for my understanding of the relationships that exist within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting to really take the time to place myself as each individual thing here....to really stand in and as each One here in this world.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having created a preference towards conflict and destruction over collaborative structured creations. I realize the ridiculousness of fighting for my limitation. I realize that working together is to get things done...is to actually move as the point of democracy here...in making things happen as a result of weathering the weather as a result of creating the ripple that is the momentum that moves the current which is currency which is our weather system which is our water which is our weather, which is our environment.

I realize I like to use synonyms for words, as this is like this and this is like this and this is like this....I realize this is a support in seeing how words are capable and able of supporting and assisting each other in working and playing together as a form of compliment and complimentary action.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge my usage of words and how I create the flow of my words in sentence structure.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear the judgment and condemnation of others for the flow and presentation of myself here in and as Word.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become apathetic within and as my Words...specifically the structuring and the sounding placement of how I lay things out. I realize I created an apathy towards practically structuring my reality. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create Apathy within myself....and within this, justify the suppression of my ability to structure and create new Potential.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to lock myself up within my word relationships in such a sneaky and deceptive manner of self-trickery that I resist to even speak or write about it....because the pain of self-condemnation as an Inferior and an Imbecile is heart breakingly embarrassing to myself as Mind Superior Royalty who is Superior to such characterizations and behaviours.

To be continued

572 Self-Interest Corrective Alignment

When and as I see myself resisting to question myself-interests, I stop and breathe, I question myself-interests, I realize the fact that there is insight to be garnered within questioning myself-interests here. I realize and understand why a hesitance as a form of resistance exists with specific regards to questioning myself-interests...because if I in fact question myself-interests here, I will in fact open up the opportunity for myself to see my conditioned programmed reality as how I have self-defined myself here. I realize and understand within daring to look at my acceptances and allowances here, the opportunity exists for me to take self-responsibility for my acceptances and allowances by removing all acceptances and allowances that are not totally awesome. I realize and understand my the pre-programmed nature of my mind/ego is to self-destruct my physicality...and therefore the point of revenge of the ego exists within my base programming as like a self-automated defense mechanisms to impulse/stimulate me within my mind to resist going there within my mind to actually see what it is I am perpetuating within myself that is totally and completely ridiculously absurd. I realize and understand how the nature of my mind consciousness system is to be motivated and moved by stimulation/fear/energy as like a particular buzz/shock/stress/strain induced upon my physicality...as like a cracking the whip upon myself as like a mind/body master/slave relationship. I realize and understand my self-commitment in equalizing my mind/body relationship here. I realize and understand the absurd ridiculousness of existing within a master/slave relationship as the mind to the body. I commit myself to stopping the inequality within and as my mind/bodyrelationship here. I commit myself to asking myself the difficult questions that directly challenge my programmed conditioned nature. I commit myself to utilizing resistance as an indicator to see where I am required to investigate/explore more.

When and as I see myself trying to over simplify the intricate complexity of my mind, I stop and breathe, I face the intricate complexity of my mind by utilizing the process of simplicity by working/looking at one point at atime and within this accumulating the points as like doing the basic mathematical accounting in counting each point and seeing the various connections that are formed and related as a result of the plethora of acceptances and allowances within myself. I realize and understand the practicality in keeping things simplistic within working with information by having a basic structured approach/methodology as how to systematically walk/work through point one by one until I am done. I commit myself to a basic simplistic approach/methodology in walking/working through my mind of acceptances and allowances one by one until I am done. I commit myself to stop trying to over simplify things as like a point of trying to create a shortcut within and as the desire to avoid/fear doing the labor within totally understanding the intricate complexity of my mind. I commit myself to practical living basic simplicity within as myself expression here. I commit myself to simplicity in design. I commit myself to Life simplicity.

When and as I see myself desiring/seeking out stimulation/entertainment/distraction, I stop and breathe, I question why I am looking to be stimulated/entertained/distracted, I investigate the full extent of my question, I look to see what I am resisting, I face my accepted and allowed resistance, I make the decision to no longer accept and allow the point of resistance within myself, I realize and understand myself responsibility as self-directive decision maker here, I realize and understand the point of self-determination/self-will within and as the self-responsibility and self-accountability of practically living self-directive decision making here. I commit myself to the self-responsibility and self-accountability within and as the practical living self-directive decision making process here. I realize and understand my self-governance as the law/rules of my being here is stemmed and rooted in my effective efficiency and ability to practically live self-directive decisions. I commit myself to practically living self-directive decisions that are in alignment with and as the principle of equality and oneness as what is best for all Life here. I realize and understand that what is best for all Life here starts with what is best for myself here. I realize and understand my decision to align myself as what is best for all Life here. I commit myself to becoming what is best for all Life here. I commit myself to giving myself what I would like to receive. 

When and as I see myself fearing to let go of my impulsed desires, I stop and breathe, I realize and understand the principle of what is best for all Life takes precedent over my impulsed desires, I realize and understand I have made the decision to give myself the best Life support and assistance and that this is a labor intensive self-directive decision that requires relentless continuous constant and consistent participation as my self-disciplined routine of the simplicity of one breath at a time. I commit myself to stepping out of mind reliance mental reality and into practical living physical reality participation. I commit myself to establishing a practical living self-disciplined creative structural approach for the birthing process of myself here as Life.

Day 529 Turning the Switch

So, I find myself here in need of a turn around...like I am starring at the misdirection I gave myself as the consequence of having an idea about chasing desire...and well I got to the point of desire...and well things just are not what I planned they would be.

I'm faced with seeing the mistake I made...and correcting my mistake requires me to do a big 180 turn around.

It's funny that I didn't want to see this earlier and had to put myself through the ringer so to speak as like travelling many miles only to realize the point that was available to see without the extensive journey.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how useless it is to project future desires within my mind and to spend my time chasing after the attainment of desires.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for judging myself within seeing a giant mistake that I made.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for considering to spite myself in seeing the giant mistake that I made by thinking and believing well I've already made the mistake...no point in immediately correcting the mistake....what's done is done...and I just got to commit to the course of direction that I am in as a result of the mistake...changing paths/course of direction would not be honorable because I committed myself in this particular direction....even if it was a mistake...I'm committed to my mistake.....WTF...

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for committing myself to mistakes that I make...like believing that I must have the integrity and honor to walk within the mistake as like it wasn't a mistake at all like to pretend that things are all good and that regardless of things not being all good I just got to stay the course because I already set the sails and there's no turning back.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having resistance to turning back on a decision I made....as a result of fearing the consequence of turning back.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being reluctant to face  myself within the vulnerability in learning from my mistake and turning back as the prevention mechanism to stop myself from furthering misdirection within and as a mistake.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the dangers of stagnation within and as the process of self realization and self-correction.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having desired a form of solace within stagnation as like a believed/pretend form of escapism from responsibilities as like a way to procrastinate on responsibilities....so that I could make believe that everything is accounted for.

When and as I realize I made a mistake, I stop and breathe, I take a moment to look at the mistake I made, I learn from the mistake, I realize and understand the fact that I made a mistake is irrelevant because I learned from my mistake. I realize and understand that crucifying myself within self-judgement is ridiculously absurd and spiteful towards my best interests.

I commit myself to not postpone seeing my mistakes.

I realize and understand the consequence of postponing to see what is here.

I realize and understand the practicality within living at the cutting edge of time.

I realize the point/practicality of living at the cutting edge of time to be a means of preventing stagnation within time.

When and as I see myself resisting to make a turnaround...as like to retrace my steps to correct my miss step, I stop and breathe and I realise and understand that postponing to correct a misstep is reckless because many more missteps...as like travelling within the abyss of misdirection will require further reverse engineering later as the means/method to remedying self-corrections as the consequence of delaying to take immediate action as a being walking at the cutting edge of time here.

I commit myself to seeing the funny here.

I commit myself to stop delaying to see the funny within my acceptances and allowances.

I commit myself learning from my mistakes.

I commit myself to avoid making mistakes by being self-honest within my decisions.

I commit myself to stop judging myself for making mistakes.

I commit myself to turn around and retrace my steps after realizing and understanding that I made a mistake.

I commit myself to self-perfection.

I commit myself to learning/expanding myself every day.