Day 695 - Torture

Let's look at the word "torture" for a moment:

The action or practice of inflicting severe pain on someone as a punishment or to force them to do or say something, or for the pleasure of the person inflicting the pain.

Great physical or mental suffering or anxiety.

A cause of suffering or anxiety

Inflict severe pain on.

Cause great mental suffering or anxiety to.


Synonyms of torture include:

abuse, ill-treatment, maltreatment, persecution, sadism, torment, agony, suffering, pain, anguish, misery, distress, heartache, affliction, scourge, trauma, wretchedness, hell, purgatory, harrow, agonize, crucify


The reason I bring up the commonly accepted dictionary definitions of torture is because I noticed within myself that I had kind of disregarded the severity of a lot of the synonymous associations to torture here, as well as the points of mental suffering and anxiety.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for neglecting to take self-responsibility for torture.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for distancing myself from torture by taking on the belief that torture is only something that really happens in a far away secretive place where government or military agents are torturing a terrorist as a means of getting them to confess certain information.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for believing that torture is something that only happens to very few unfortunate people.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for thinking nothing the phrases...."stop torturing your mother"....or "stop torturing your brother"....or "stop torturing him/her"...or "Why do you have to torture him/her, you know it provokes them?"

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for taking amusement from torture.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for deliberately provoking others into uncomfortable situations because I believe it is good for them.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for believing that torture is good for some people...like they really need to learn things that most unfortunate way.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for justifying torture.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for thinking that torture from the perspective of deliberately triggering strong emotions and discomforts within others isn't really torture.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to dismiss actions that deliberately provoke and stir up emotion within others without providing any frame work of support in order to remove/remediate/correct emotional disposition.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I have tortured myself within incessant thought/feeling/emotion participation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understand judgement to be a form of torture.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to torture myself within self-judgement and self-comparisons.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for torturing myself within and as my accepted and allowed backchat about anything and everything.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing a relationship with torture to exist within myself where I accept and allow torture to as a justifiable action.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for compromising my relationship with myself and others as a result of accepting and allowing the validation of torture to exist within myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for neglecting and disregarding myself and all all Life here within and as the justification for the existence of torture.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for disregarding the extent to which our world system perpetuates torture.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for nor realizing and understanding the inherent nature of my mind in thriving off of the acceptance and allowance of torture.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how polarized energetic word relationships contribute and perpetuate the existence of self-torture within one's mind/body relationship....as an unfortunate out flowing consequence of the accepted and allowed input.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for manipulating myself and others with torture tactics from the perspective of deliberately invoking anxiety and angst within another.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to become addicted to torture.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being inconsiderate to others who are being tortured by themselves and their relationships with others.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for neglecting compassion for humanity.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the extent to which humanity tortures itself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the mistreatment of humanity.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for justifying the mistreatment and torture of humanity.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to ignore and excuse the torture of animals.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for justifying the torture of animals as being necessary for the benefit of humanity.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for rationalizing the existence of torture.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for torturing others within and as my deliberately intense interrogation.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to torture myself within and as the acceptance and allowance of subtle thoughts that seem so right.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to torture myself within harboring opinions about others.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for believing it to be necessary and normal to participate in assumptions, judgments, opinions about others.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for torturing myself within reacting to information....and believing it necessary for me to react.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the extent to which torture exists here in our shared reality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not even regarding the design or torture here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for ignoring the torture that exists here.

I forgive myself for justifying the denial of the existence of torture here because it is something that is very negative and I believe it is better to focus on the positive.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for perpetuating the existence of a negative world as a result of believing it is better to focus on the positive.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for dismissing accountability and responsibility for actively disengaging torturous acceptances and allowances here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being conditioned to torture as being a normal part of life on our planet.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having resisted to really reflect upon the point of torture.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for dismissing my mind/body relationship within and as the word torture.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding abuse within language as a point of seemingly invisible violence. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing  myself for not realizing and understanding a toxic tortuously toxic vocabulary

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go along with the torture that exists in our shared reality, by not speaking up.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how cruel and inhumane the design of our shared world system in fact is.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being fearful of torture to such an extent that I would submit and suppress the expression of myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding torture to exist as like a fear derivative.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I have been manipulated by torturous tactics.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to manipulate others with torturous tactics.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding the relationship with torture and schadenfreude.


When and as I see myself about to engage myself in torturous activity, I stop and breathe, I see/realize and understand the unacceptable abuse and disregard that torture is in fact. I realize that torture is reacted out in many different ways. I commit myself to let go of reactions by grounding them into the earth with the awareness of my breath here as the recognition and acknowledgement of knowing what is and isn't best for Life.

I commit myself to sharing insight and perspective about the extent to which we humans have collectively accepted and allowed a World of torture to exist here as our shared reality and planet.

I commit myself to assisting and supporting the transformation of a prison planet world system to that of and as Heaven on Earth as the presentation of what is best for all Life.

I commit myself to sharing my vision of playground planet earth.

I commit myself to stop the existence of Torture.

I commit myself to providing realizations about the ridiculousness of torture.



In looking at the word torture....

it's like "to right you are.....too right you are....the self-righteous staunch of justification/spite/retribution/revenge/belief/security/control/programming/conditioning... torture...torch her...an ultimate burn....it's like an act of killing...if you consider the trauma that can be associated with torture...it's like killing someone's beingness whether they actually totally physically die or not, because if a being is so traumatized....it's like you/they are already dead inside....like a serious stuckness....where it's like this constant shaking of instability and insecurity....where it's like being so broken and compartmentalized into these tiny pieces....yet in actuality you are the sum of all the pieces...


I commit myself to stop perpetuating an existence of Torture.

I commit myself to the prevention of Torture.

Day 533 Ranting and Raving Friendship Judgement

There's hesitance in me to write this evening. A point that surfaced early in my day today was the point of attraction...where I saw and realized there is judgement within and as the point of attraction within myself. Like, I was looking at this with regards to friendship and the particular type of people I am interested in engaging and how there is so many people that I don't even register any particular interest to really engage. It's like an immediate judgement...where I size someone up and I see if this is someone who seems to align with all my particular self-interests. Like basically someone who is exactly like me...where It could be said, ya were on the same page...like I like this page and you also like this page....we got the same attitude about things. 

It's interesting how extensive this point is. I see how I am influenced by the presentation of people...like without really even knowing much about someone...just seeing them within a classroom setting...it's like I have tailored my picks of people to talk to based upon the way in which they are presented.

I see how my interaction with people has been conditioned within the veils of self-righteousness. Where I will or will not communicate with people so often because of my self-righteous judgement and the desire to align within and as my self-righteous judgement.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being extremely self-righteous and judgmental about developing friendships/relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for resisting to develop relationships that are in my immediate environment out of spitefully holding out for a believed better person/people to develop relationships/friendships with.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being close minded within developing relationships.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for desiring to connect with people who are exactly like me within and as starting point attitude of shared self-interests.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for suppressing the expansion and development of relationships within my reality as a result of not realizing and understanding how spiteful and self-righteous I have accepted and allowed myself to be.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how extensively I have accepted and allowed myself to be afraid of my own nastiness as spite and self-righteousness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how I have been influencing people with my accepted and allowed spite and self-righteous attitude of judgement as accepted and allowed hierarchy of inequality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being disappointed and shamed within facing unpleasant truths about the nature of my acceptances and allowances.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for bullying myself and others within spite and self-righteousness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for holding myself within the belief perception of and as an authority within and as self-righteousness where I believe and perceive myself to know and trust in my own self-judgement and self-righteousness.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for being discriminatory within my communication as like being energetically inclined to want to communicate with people who have the same self-interests as me and less inclined to communicate with people who do not obviously appear to share the same self-interests as me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for judging people based upon how cool I think they are...like even if they do share some of the same self-interests as me...like based upon how cool I think their external appearance is...

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for limiting my communication with people as a result of judging people's external appearance.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for creating a hierarchy of cool...as like believing myself to be the authority of cool as separate from others...and judging others as to where they fit in within and as the scale of cool.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not being interested in letting go of self-interested judgments.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for holding onto self-interested judgments.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for feeling guilty within seeing and realizing how extensively I have accepted and allowed myself to judge and discriminate against other beings within my reality.

TO BE CONTINUED